Extreme social anxiety

[Confused84]

Anyone else develop extreme social anxiety while on Adderall?

[LILTEX41]

Funny you mention this. I had social anxiety before Adderall and I found Adderall helped me with it....but sometimes it did the opposite effect. I have found that social anxiety is the thing I struggle the most with not having Adderall. What's going on with you? Do tell!

[Confused84]

Hey LILTEX,

I've heard of it going both ways. I've been on Adderall now for over half my life--about 15 years (every day at between 30 - 40 milligrams a day). I was prescribed it for inattentive ADHD. I've never had a problem with abusing it. Before Adderall I had been taking Ritilin for 2 years--but it hardly did anything for me.

I was first prescribed it in the summer of the year I graduated middle school (this was in 1998 and I had just turned 14).

Most of the friends I'd had in middle school ended up going to a different high school in the fall, so at about the same time I was first prescribed Adderall I was also going through that whole transition as well.

Anyway, once I started high school and was taking Adderall I pretty much just locked myself in my room and completely focused on schoolwork (I'd always been a terrible student before Adderall). Needless to say my grades improved tremendously. The problem was that I began to completely shut everyone out and wasn't socializing, wasn't making friends, and wasn't dating. My personality totally changed and I became quiet, cerebral, and (frankly) kind of boring. I began to relish in the time I spent alone. For a long time I didn't really have a problem with being around other people, I just preferred being alone.

Then gradually it came to be like I couldn't STAND being around other people.

After years of this sort of degenerative behavior it got to be like I'm "addicted" to being alone--tough to explain but anyone with this type of issue probably knows what I'm referring to.

About eight years ago I was diagnosed with Avoidant Personality Disorder--which is like an extreme version of Generalized Social Anxiety Disorder.

At the time I didn't think too much about the diagnoses but as the years passed by I've gotten worse and worse.

All through high school and up to this point I've literally only had one person I can say was an actual friend (but we wen't our separate ways quite a few years ago). Sounds helluv pathetic, I know--but most people don't see that there's anything wrong with me. Anyway, that's kind of my story as far as the social anxiety goes. What are your issues?

[LILTEX41]

Confused, I have been reading up on Social Anxiety and GAD for the past few days. I've found a couple of helpful websites. From what I'm learning about anxiety, the reason it gets worse is by doing exactly what you've been doing..hiding away, isolating, and not facing your fears. To overcome it, we must do the things that we fear and keep doing it. From what I'm reading it's all about re-wiring our brains to dispute our Automated Negative Thoughts and replace those thoughts with new healthy thoughts. It has to be done repetitively. It is persistent training that must be done daily. Here's a link to the websites I found: anxietyzone.com and http://www.socialanxietyinstitute.org/

Here is a magnificent poem I read last night from this new website I found...so awesome.

My Garden

Deep inside of me there is a garden, full of many seeds. Three very special seeds have names. Those names are Confidence, Calmness and Contentment. I was born with these seeds, but when I was young the garden was not tended to, and the seeds of ugly weeds began to take over Confidence, Calmness, and Contentment. As I grew older, I thought that the weeds had taken over the garden for good, and that Confidence, Calmness, and Contentment were killed.

Gone forever.

What I didn’t know was that the little seeds, no matter how many times they were stepped on or neglected, were the strongest seeds in the garden. They were alive, only lying dormant, for many years. For when I began tending the garden myself by nurturing the seeds with the love and respect that they deserved – small, yet strong, lovely sprouts began to grow.

Someday soon they will chase away the weeds and become the most beautiful flowers in my garden.

Eventually, they will drop other seeds into the fertile soil and they too will grow strong with lovely flowers, with names like Hope, Pride, Peace, and Dignity.

Nobody will be able to walk on my garden again --- I won’t let them!

For I know that every human being has the right to grow a beautiful garden inside of them.

[LILTEX41]

One other quick thing I found on this...someone said what was helpful for their anxiety was to change their diet (healthy of course) and taking B-Complex and Magnesium vitamins. I got some the other day and I think they are already having an effect on me. I do actually feel calmer. Just thought I'm mention it. Gotta go back to work now. Sorry I don't have time to discuss more, but wanted to post my findings.

[Confused84]

Thanks for the comments LILTEX! I'll post more later ...

[Cassie]

Adderall may have made me a tad more social in the beginning - like the first year or so - but it went downhill incrementally after that. The best way I can describe it is that I always felt like I was a third party watching my actions and dictating to my brain what to say, rather than having free flowing conversations in the moment. I became socially awkward and my interactions clunky.

I also remember at one point being afraid to go jogging outside because other people jogging might look at me funny, so there was definite paranoia too.

Liltex's tips are good, but if you try to do those things while remaining on adderall then you're missing a big and obvious piece of the puzzle - removing the drug which has caused you the anxiety. I can't tell you how many self help books I read on adderall because I was in denial that the adderall was the cause of my problems that I was desperately trying to use self help techniques to fix. It's like taking medicine for type 2 diabetes but not cutting out the junk food and sugar that caused you to develop the disease.

[whosthisguy]

Has anyone found that this gets a lot better after quitting? I have always been self-conscious but able to manage well. On AD, this got a little better at first (like Cassie said) but it spiraled out of control. I almost failed a class one time because I COULD NOT GET OUT OF THE MIRROR. I would stare for 30 minutes combing my hair until it was in perfect symmetry. And if you knew me, you'd know that there is no symmetry to be had. By the time I had to go to class, I'd be super late. I have no qualms about being late, that's just my personality, but I was so paranoid that people were going to stare at me when I walked into class. So unlike me. It's starting to get a little better now, but I sort of used Adderall as a social crutch (paradoxically) and I miss it. :/

[ashley6]

Has anyone found that this gets a lot better after quitting? I have always been self-conscious but able to manage well. On AD, this got a little better at first (like Cassie said) but it spiraled out of control. I almost failed a class one time because I COULD NOT GET OUT OF THE MIRROR. I would stare for 30 minutes combing my hair until it was in perfect symmetry. And if you knew me, you'd know that there is no symmetry to be had. By the time I had to go to class, I'd be super late. I have no qualms about being late, that's just my personality, but I was so paranoid that people were going to stare at me when I walked into class. So unlike me. It's starting to get a little better now, but I sort of used Adderall as a social crutch (paradoxically) and I miss it. :/

Yes, it gets soooo much better after quitting. I did fail a class because I was so anxious (now I believe it was paranoia) because I couldn't function well in public. It got so terrible the last two years, I didn't want to go anywhere. Fast forward to now...it is SO much better. I still get social anxiety here and there, but I'm more confident and comfortable in my own skin, and a lot of that stuff (like trying to get your hair perfect) just fades away. That's my experience anyway. Also, I began to believe those awful fears and anxiety were just a part of me...when it was the adderall exacerbating it. For someone who has social anxiety already, stimulants are a bad deal....this is my opinion. Hope it helps!

[Jon]

^{A huge part of my initial attraction to Adderall was a newfound outgoingness. I loved the way I could talk to anyone, anywhere, even in front of a group of people. True apothecary, as Shakespeare said when he drank the deadly poison.}

 

^{Isolation during withdrawal period sounds appropriate, with so much sleeping and rest necessary. I work rotating shiftwork, which is inherently isolating. By nature, I lean toward the introversion side of the continuum. I feel the bite of isolation acutely at this point in my quit. I do not dislike it, but I think it is, like the drug itself, unsustainable. I am making a determined effort to connect with friends this weekend.}

[catw66]

Hi - I've always had a certain degree of social anxiety and am an introvert, though I find myself talking to the right people at times as an empath - possibly trying to relieve any of their anxiety....very strange.

 

Interesting about how some people think adderall drove them in after a while. I think it did the same to me. I just felt unmotivated as all getout and I attribute that to depression, which has also been really bad the past few years. Wondering if the Adderall dipped my energy over time and then I just kept finding excuses not to go out and engage.

 

Determined myself to go to some Ragtime street fair and take pictures this weekend....even feeling very tired.