lunax Posted August 7, 2013 Report Share Posted August 7, 2013 i feel like I'm so close to coming out to someone about my addiction. But I'm scared that it will make look hypercritical for all the times I've judged others with addictions, and most of all I'm afraid that my closest friends/family will lose respect for me. I'm getting married in a few months and although my fiancé knows I'm on it, he chooses to turn a blind eye to the fact that I'm abusing it. I think he would be so turned off by me especially since hes dealt with my addictions before i.e. my binge drinking a few years back. I'm going on 6 yrs on and off of adderall. I'm half way through a bottle I just got last week and this time I'm actually scared of how my body will respond to not having it. As I type, I am having pain in my left kidney which I know I've caused. I've reached rock bottom this time and I need help getting back up. This is why I'm here. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jessy Posted August 7, 2013 Report Share Posted August 7, 2013 It is scary as hell just thinking of not having something to take, I know this. But you just gotta jump, just do it, take it one day at a time until it starts to get easy, until you do that nothing will change. I know what its like to be in the "closet" with it, my family and friends thought of me as a perfect angle! lol wow were they wrong, but you just deal with it, there going to love you no matter what happens. I felt they might lose respect for me too, and hell some of them might have, but im getting better everyday and really its just something in the rearview mirror now. My fiancée did the same thing with me, turning his head like nothing was going on, but he is my biggest supporter now he wants me to be happy and healthy and im sure your husband will feel the same way. The people that love you will always love you, hang in there everything will work out. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lunax Posted August 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 7, 2013 Ironically enough my best friend is taking me to the ER for the kidney pain ( as we speak)and somehow I managed to tell her about it. I feel like she didnt believe me but Im sure we will discuss it in more detail later. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jessy Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Good luck, I hope its nothing to serious! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catw66 Posted August 8, 2013 Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 good luck and I too hope it is not too serious wiht the kidney thing. Keep yourself hydrated. Adderall withdrawal only lasts so long - at leas the worst parts of it so if you can handle it, you can get through this. I had to cut myself down and then did the suggestion to take an adderall holiday - just one day off - and kept going from there. It is bad at first but I really wanted off the stuff as I was having such severe depression headaches when it would wear off and was feeling suididal and like I couldn't stand another moment of my suffering some days. This slowly went away finally and keeps getting better. L-Tyrosine and good vitamins of the B-type really helped as well, I believe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lunax Posted August 8, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2013 Thanks guys. It turns out I have a bladder infection which sucks but was a good reason to stay home again today and sleep in....which is all my body wants to do after a second day of not taking adderall. Feeling extremely tired, lazy, unmotivated, and hungry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tessa0412 Posted August 9, 2013 Report Share Posted August 9, 2013 Take it as a sign'!!! It got u to open up to a friend and open ur mind to telling people. I' was a closet adderall abuser for YEARS let me tell u opening up to people makes u feel like a thousand pounds are lifted off of u... N honestly that feels better than Anybody calling u a hypocrite ( which I dought will happen) don't be scared to speak your truth. Open that throat chakra and be honest . N if anyone gives u shit than fuck em they are not a positive energy to have around u at this time anyway Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tessa0412 Posted August 9, 2013 Report Share Posted August 9, 2013 Oops from my last post .. I meant... *that weight lifted from speaking your truth feels better and bigger than any thing... so that being called a hypocrite is the last thing u will care about . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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