ldmcniel Posted August 15, 2013 Report Share Posted August 15, 2013 I haven't posted in awhile. The good news is I'm still clean and sober, the bad news, the mistakes I made while on Adderall are catching up to me. I've lost my job of 14 years. I'm most likely black balled in the medical community and have ruined my career. For those of you who are not ready to quit, DO IT! DO IT NOW! Do not wait until you cause a string of problems. I hate Adderall! I hate myself more for letting it control me and ruin me. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted August 15, 2013 Report Share Posted August 15, 2013 I'm sorry to hear you lost your job. I just went through this and can identify. It seems like everyone on this site either gets fired , quits or get demoted from their jobs. I'm in the process of finding another job. I don't think its because we are incompetent or haven't done our jobs. The Addy's just fuck with our social skills. Any ways I'm sure your not black balled, that seems a bit extreme. I like watching sports comeback stories. Check Vice Magazines profile of legendary skater Guy Mariano and his come back from drugs etc. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sebastian05 Posted August 15, 2013 Report Share Posted August 15, 2013 idmcniel, could you elaborate please? why did you lose your job? what happened? how's the quit going. how are doing emotionally etc? zerokewl, looks like ur new to this forum. all due respect, i think "sucks dude" is a little insensitive. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
resetBrain Posted August 15, 2013 Report Share Posted August 15, 2013 idmcniel, So sorry you're having to deal with this. So many of us are struggling to pick up the scattered and shattered pieces of ourselves and put something back together, and have either gone through this situation or are afraid we will. This job loss sounds nothing less than devastating. Based everything else I've seen ZK post here--honest stuff, supportive stuff--I'm pretty sure "sucks dude" is meant the same way. Honest and supportive. You say "I hate Adderall! I hate myself more for letting it control me and ruin me." I hear you there, but I also see that YOU ARE NOT LETTING IT CONTROL YOU ANYMORE. And in the big picture -even though it may feel that way now- you are not ruined. You are strong, and you are resilient. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted August 15, 2013 Report Share Posted August 15, 2013 ldmcniel I'm so sorry to hear all that you're going through. Adderall leaves us all with a huge mess to clean up and it takes a long, long time. Especially the social side of work-- it can take forever to clean up those pieces once people have a certain impression of us. I'm so happy to hear that you're still clean. That's most important. Quitting is a whole new beginning in so many ways. Maybe there's a better job for you out there? Maybe this is an unexpected push towards a better future, in ways that you can't even see yet? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted August 15, 2013 Report Share Posted August 15, 2013 Sorry about the sucks dude comment. I really did mean it a supportive way. I too lost my job/ career to adderall abuse. Ironically one of the reasons I lost my job was saying stupid and unprofessional things like "Sucks Dude". I've never been good at the office politics. Good at the job bad at the politics, very naive and too honest. When I get back to the real world I need to change this. Before I go back to work I need to read some books on office politics. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted August 15, 2013 Report Share Posted August 15, 2013 ldmcniel, You inspire me by staying free from Adderall during this crisis. I wish I had healing words for you about losing your job after 14 years. I don't have any magic words. I know if it happened to me, I would be crushed. You just have to survive this somehow. You have already proven your resilience on the battlefield. Here is a link to a "Dear Sugar' column that may lift your spirits. It's called "The Future has an Ancient Heart" I send it to you with the best of intentions, knowing that they are merely words. It doesn't even have anything to do with losing a job. I guess I'm also trying to say I give a fuck about you because you are a member of this community and would like to see you recover from Adderall in every way. I am one of the little ducklings riding in your wake. http://therumpus.net/2011/05/dear-sugar-the-rumpus-advice-column-72-the-future-has-an-ancient-heart/ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catw66 Posted August 16, 2013 Report Share Posted August 16, 2013 I hear you. I've been on Adderall for three years and I believe it was the icing on the cake of my psychiatric drug taking career that caused me to realize I need off of the other two meds I have been on for depression and pain and let me tell you it is no picnic. PAWS or post acute withdrawal can last a long time for some of us and it may always be some sort of an issue. I think to still give it time, keep doing my yoga, keep eating well and working on things that activate my brain in a different way. I am still getting crushing depression headaches though not nearly as severe when I was on Adderall. My life too was ruined by a lot of things and not thinking clearly, because I was being controlled by toxic chemcals. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ldmcniel Posted August 17, 2013 Author Report Share Posted August 17, 2013 Thank you everyone. Sometimes you just need others perspective on things Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quit-once Posted August 17, 2013 Report Share Posted August 17, 2013 LDMcNeil, Just curious, did your losing your job have anything to do with your anti-adderall facebook page? I remember you worked in a doctors office and you have some very good insight into the evils of the medical profession and drug industry as it relates to prescribing harmful, addictive drugs and the creation of artificial "disorders" to be treated with these awful drugs. Once upon a time, we had a constitution that guaranteed our free speech (#1) and freedom from searches and seizures (#4) among other things. Those days are behind us now. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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