zhenka11230 Posted October 1, 2013 Report Share Posted October 1, 2013 I believe low-grade depression was why I started taking the drug anyways. I was particularly hopeless at that period of my life and the drug seemed like an answer. Of course the initial euphoria did cure all my problems, but after a few month I started developing sudden onsets of severe mood disturbances while ON the drug (not crash). At first I would have a few days when the drug would cause my to feel sad all day long (similar to mourning), and then it got worse and worse until it turned into a permanent depression. Of course I was told that I had a co-morbid problem but thankfully I was smart enough to realize I was just suffering from drug-induced brain damage and needed to stop ASAP. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted October 2, 2013 Report Share Posted October 2, 2013 On Adderall I experienced a full spectrum of amplified emotions. From what I can remember my thinking was pretty erratic. Grief was one of those emotions. I used adderall to numb some emotions and improve my self-esteem. Making the first few months off adderall particularly emotional. Adderall really messes with your brain chemistry and your brain to get back to normal dopamine/serontonin levels. Brain chemistry is really tricky it just takes time to heal and create new synapses etc. Overcoming depression is something I am struggling with since I got off Adderall 4 months ago. Determined to not take any pills for it I did all the things recommended for depression (exercising, meditation, eating right, abstinence from all substances), though these things help. Reluctantly I started taking anti D's a few weeks ago that seem to have levelled me off. Depression is tricky anti-d's are just part of the solution. I haven't beat it yet and completely understand the place you are in. Eventually this will pass. Don't give up and keep fighting. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted October 2, 2013 Report Share Posted October 2, 2013 On Adderall I experienced a full spectrum of amplified emotions. From what I can remember my thinking was pretty erratic. Grief was one of those emotions. I used adderall to numb some emotions and improve my self-esteem. Making the first few months off adderall particularly emotional. Adderall really messes with your brain chemistry and your brain to get back to normal dopamine/serontonin levels. Brain chemistry is really tricky it just takes time to heal and create new synapses etc. Overcoming depression is something I am struggling with since I got off Adderall 4 months ago. Determined to not take any pills for it I did all the things recommended for depression (exercising, meditation, eating right, abstinence from all substances), though these things help. Reluctantly I started taking anti D's a few weeks ago that seem to have levelled me off. Depression is tricky anti-d's are just part of the solution. I haven't beat it yet and completely understand the place you are in. Eventually this will pass. Don't give up and keep fighting. I just turned this in to a sticky on my desktop. So true, so well said! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted October 2, 2013 Report Share Posted October 2, 2013 Wow thanks I feel honoured. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted October 2, 2013 Report Share Posted October 2, 2013 the more I think about it. I was depressed before, after,during and after adderall. Hmm well I'm dealing now. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassie Posted October 2, 2013 Report Share Posted October 2, 2013 A good book I read once about depression is called "Get it Done When You're Depressed". The gist of it is that sometimes motivation follows actions, but often times it doesn't come at all, and you have to get things done in spite of that. So when you do things, instead of motivation being the impetus or the reward, the reward is more like, "oh, I did this and it wasn't as impossible as I thought it would be when I begrudgingly started. Maybe the next thing I do won't be as impossible either." It has some good strategies for working with your depression, rather than against it by "thinking positive" and other things that don't really work when you're depressed. Your depression will definitely get better the longer you are sober though as well. 4 months is pretty early on. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerokewl Posted October 2, 2013 Report Share Posted October 2, 2013 ugg 4 months still early days. God this was only supposed to take 6 weeks tops. Well I am moving forward and I think I'm now dealing with issues (self confidence, social anxiety, depression and anger) that we're what lead to my speedy decline. I really do believe I am going to better than ever when this period of my life is done. It is a longer haul than I expected. Thank-you for the book suggestion and summary. I've always been jealous of you literary types, i just don't have a long attention span for books. I do read, just in shorter bites (comics, magazines, web content). Here is my summary of book I've been reading on the topic. "The Little Engine That Could" . http://www.printmag.com/obsessions/watty-pipers-1930-the-little-engine-that-could/ It has some useful coping strategies, like using cognitive behavioural techniques and positive affirmations. The protagonist and his friends overcome an insurmountable obstacle by simply believing in themselves and one another. Peace! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
resetBrain Posted October 3, 2013 Report Share Posted October 3, 2013 Zhenka11230, I HIGHLY suspect depression was induced by Adderall for me. I've mentioned this elsewhere on the forums...yes, I had a major bout of depression for several years during undergraduate school with zero Adderall involved. But I had more than a decade without severe depression...until about 6 months after I started taking Adderall. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeHereNow Posted October 5, 2013 Report Share Posted October 5, 2013 Hi zhenka, I definitely had adderall induced depression. I was not depressed when I started. It was one of the happiest times of my life. (Wow what a mistake I made.) Well, within months I was extremely depressed. Yeah there were some life changes involved so I blamed them, I never blamed it on the adderall but in hindsight I know it was because I know how it affects my brain chemistry now. It got worse and worse. My final month on adderall was probably the worst month of my life. That adderall hell was so much worse than quitting. I've been depressed through much of my quit, but there is NO WAY that even the worst bout of PAWS-induced depression could even come close to how bad it was last November/December. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted October 6, 2013 Report Share Posted October 6, 2013 Zhenka - there is no doubt in mind that adderall addiction causes depression. Any addiction would cause depression + all the chemical changes its making in your brain. I definitely had adderall induced depression. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted October 6, 2013 Report Share Posted October 6, 2013 A good book I read once about depression is called "Get it Done When You're Depressed". The gist of it is that sometimes motivation follows actions, but often times it doesn't come at all, and you have to get things done in spite of that. So when you do things, instead of motivation being the impetus or the reward, the reward is more like, "oh, I did this and it wasn't as impossible as I thought it would be when I begrudgingly started. Maybe the next thing I do won't be as impossible either." It has some good strategies for working with your depression, rather than against it by "thinking positive" and other things that don't really work when you're depressed. Your depression will definitely get better the longer you are sober though as well. 4 months is pretty early on. Cassie I own a copy of that book too. Its amazing how much it applies to adderall addicts who are quitting because we often feel like without the pills we have no motivation to get anything done. And we are also depressed. And that book is all about how to motivate yourself to get things done when you have no motivation. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.