Thinking about getting off Adderall after being on for nearly 16 years

[Jmans407]

Hi all. Been thinking about getting off Adderall, here's my story:

 

When I was born I had something called Short Gut Syndrome and almost died. Weighed 2lbs and spent several months in an incubator. They removed much of my small intestines and I miraculously survived. In second grade I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 6. I was prescribed Adderall. We found that because I have less intestines that everyone else, less medication gets absorbed by my body and as a result, doesn't work as well. After fiddling with dosages for a year or two, we found what worked and as I got older dosages increased.

Today, I am 21 years old. I take two 30 mg of XR when I wake up, another two 30 mg of XR 5 hours later, and one 20 mg later on in that day if I have homework or sports. That's a total of 140mg of Adderall per day. Yes, I know, it's a lot. I see a specialist every 6 months to test my heart and just check up on me. Tests come up normal every time.

I am a junior in college studying education. I recently began to think about what life would be like without Adderall. I've been taking it every single day since I was 6 and I literally don't know what life is like off of it. Adderall is all I've ever known.

Just wanted some input on what you guys think about my situation and what it was like for people who quit Adderall after being on it for an extremely long period of time like myself.

[Frank B]

 I think your situation is fucked up and should have the right to sue your doctors for creating a life long amphetamine addiction in someone who should have never been put on it. Your extreme dosages seems to be criminal especially given the health risk you have. I hope you have a desire to quit because think it's not really a option to continue on at your pace by the time a doctor finds irregularity in your heart probably be too late. But hey then they can always make more money off you to treat that. See it for what it is your a addict doctors are your drug dealers they beleive you'll be a lifelong consumer started you very very young and whatever damage they do to you will only profit them more. Sorry maybe not what you want to hear but that's my belief and sure a few others on here may see it that way also. 

[Subtracterall]

Curious about how you feel physically and mentally. After over twelve years on addy (low dose) I was totally burned out and that's putting it mildly. Of course you are way younger then I am. Anyway sad to say it, but I agree with Frank. The good news is you made it this far and are alive and well. Flipping nuts they give this poison to young children. How do you feel when you don't take it?  Are you able to get out of bed in the morning and go about your normal daily routine?  If so what's stopping you from quitting now?

if it was me...I would complete my degree and then plan a three month vacation to quit this stuff for good.  But if you can graduate without it, quit now.  IMO life is different off addy. Different and better.  You deserve to try it out for yourself. 

[Cheeri0]

While you're on a high dose, it sounds like you've never abused your script. Is that true? If so, you might have avoided the very slippery slope of binge use (which, at your monthly consumption levels is pretty life-saving). If you feel spiritually/mentally/physically off, college (although stressful) might actually be an ideal time to experiment with sobriety. Building sober confidence now would serve you well in the future if you decide to stay med-free. Please keep us updated and let us know what you decide! We're all rooting for you.

[Jmans407]

Thanks for the replies you guys.

Frank, these extreme dosages were the result of the medication not being fully absorbed. An Adderall specialist writes these prescriptions.

Mentally, I feel okay. Physically, perfectly fine. I play baseball 3-5 days a week. After going through the ups and downs of Adderall on a daily basis for the last 16 years, I'm kind of growing tired of it. I want consistency. Adderall affects my thoughts and emotions daily and I want to know if there's more to life than this. Without Adderall, for all I know, I could completely evolve as a person.

I haven't gone a day without taking it in about 10 years. Back in middle school I forgot one day and I remember having an extreme urge to be very annoying along with a lack of motivation and coordination. I'm pretty certain that if I decided to quit Adderall I would have to be checked into an inpatient rehab facility. Couldn't do it on my own. I want to do this over the summer but the problem is, I don't have that kind of time. I work all summer until September when school starts again. One thing I think about is that if I do begin that process of quitting and ridding my body of Adderall completely, there's no going back forever. What if I do still need it? What if I cannot focus without it once I'm off?

Also, I've never abused it, been pretty good about it. 

[Lizzie]

I hate to say it,  but the mood swings and emotional instability will just get worse if you continue taking it.  It is not for long term use, don't lie to yourself. I took it 15 years and never wanted to admit it was the culprit for my roller coaster emotions. I've been off it for almost 2 months and my real personality is so much better. Make the change, you can do it. It will be hard, but totally worth it. 

[Subtracterall]

" I work all summer until September when school starts again. One thing I think about is that if I do begin that process of quitting and ridding my body of Adderall completely, there's no going back forever. What if I do still need it? What if I cannot focus without it once I'm off?"

Part of getting off adderall is accepting that we are human - not super human machines.  You probably won't be the same without it and that's okay - you have to accept your real self and your natural productivity which you may find is even better then what you do now.  As for not having time - try quitting while holding down a full time job, mortgage, kids and being the family breadwinner. What I'm trying to say is since you are young and don't have kids this is actually a very good time in your life to do this.   

[Frank B]

On 6/6/2017 at 10:42 PM, Jmans407 said:

Thanks for the replies you guys.

Frank, these extreme dosages were the result of the medication not being fully absorbed. An Adderall specialist writes these prescriptions.

Mentally, I feel okay. Physically, perfectly fine. I play baseball 3-5 days a week. After going through the ups and downs of Adderall on a daily basis for the last 16 years, I'm kind of growing tired of it. I want consistency. Adderall affects my thoughts and emotions daily and I want to know if there's more to life than this. Without Adderall, for all I know, I could completely evolve as a person.

I haven't gone a day without taking it in about 10 years. Back in middle school I forgot one day and I remember having an extreme urge to be very annoying along with a lack of motivation and coordination. I'm pretty certain that if I decided to quit Adderall I would have to be checked into an inpatient rehab facility. Couldn't do it on my own. I want to do this over the summer but the problem is, I don't have that kind of time. I work all summer until September when school starts again. One thing I think about is that if I do begin that process of quitting and ridding my body of Adderall completely, there's no going back forever. What if I do still need it? What if I cannot focus without it once I'm off?

Also, I've never abused it, been pretty good about it. 

Your young still but one day it's going to hit u like a ton of bricks. With school sports job it's never going to be "the right time to quit" seems a lot of baseball stars take this shit you might know Chris Davis 1st baseman Baltimore he takes it and u know back in 2014 his addiction really helped my Royals easily sweep the Orioles post season because he was not eligible to play because in a drug test it showed up as a PED. In 2015 off it he couldn't do shit off addy so guess what 2016 he got a doctors excuse he was ADD then being allowed to take it by MLB all the sudden he was a great player again. I see him as a cheater no different than Barry Bonds and steroids but he makes multi millions so he can live with it but deep down he knows just as I did taking it he is cheating it's not normal and eventually your going to pay for it one way or another. 

[Jmans407]

I know all about the Chris Davis story! It was very important for his career to produce results on the field as quickly as possible, thus why he went back to the drug. For me, however, the circumstances are not as dire. I believe that over the years I have been able to teach myself to focus when I need to, and I am confident that I will able to execute that even more once I'm off Adderall full time.

[Jmans407]

UPDATE:

On Monday, July 3rd, I began cutting out the second dose of Adderall XR. Now I just take two 30mg (so, 60mg) of XR in the morning around 7am when I wake up, and nothing else the rest of the day. The first two days were fine, but lately I've been starting to feel kind of spacey and out of it later on in the day. I think it's just going to take some getting used to, I'm not sure. It's a weird feeling I've never felt before. It feels like I'm in a daze. I'm managing it though. Any input?

[Frank B]

36 minutes ago, Jmans407 said:

UPDATE:

On Monday, July 3rd, I began cutting out the second dose of Adderall XR. Now I just take two 30mg (so, 60mg) of XR in the morning around 7am when I wake up, and nothing else the rest of the day. The first two days were fine, but lately I've been starting to feel kind of spacey and out of it later on in the day. I think it's just going to take some getting used to, I'm not sure. It's a weird feeling I've never felt before. It feels like I'm in a daze. I'm managing it though. Any input?

Your brain is craving the drug in the afternoon it sort of shuts down a little that nothing unusual. Your brain feels it must have this drug to function. But cutting back before quitting 100% will help the shock just be sure to map out the plan and follow it no matter how you feel or what comes up in your life.