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1 Month!


sirod9

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Today marks 1 month free from adderall. I still have a long ways to go, but I don't care. I am just grateful to be crawling out of the hole I dug myself into while taking that drug.

Here is a list of things I am experiencing:

  • My natural life force energy is increasing;
  •  Work is getting easier. I was close to quitting my job towards the end of my adderall use because I found my job unbearable (weird, huh).  but now my enthusiasm is returning. I find my work easier to perform WITHOUT adderall. and I know when to ask for help, take a break;
  • I'm a bit bloated. I've gained 10 lbs (give or take); but I am getting back into exercise and eating healthy (during the weekdays);
  • I enjoy TRUE rest during the weekends, and there is no shame in my lazy time;
  • I feel CALM. I can feel my nervous system relaxing. it is very peaceful;
  • My relationship may be salvageable. I about ruined it due to my awkward, paranoid, angry adderall disposition. I love him very much and I'm hoping we can reconnect. He is really closed off, but he still loves me and is beginning to open back up. I'm no longer in a "me against him" state of mind. I'm able to be kind without worrying that I am being messed with - adderall made me isolate and think everyone was against me. This absolutely killed my relationship and was extremely toxic. I am seeing how that operated in the background causing all sorts of issues.
  • BUT, if the relationship is not salvageable; I am okay with that. I care about myself and him enough to let it go, if needed;
  • my dreams are WILD. lots of crazy self learning going on in that area of my life
  • I can return to partaking in ayahuasca and have an ayahuasca weekend planned in October. 
  • I love myself enough to know that I am better without adderall. I am good enough as is and am capable of improving in any area of my life should I choose to do so
  • I'm happy
  • I'm excited about life again

so, in case anyone is wanting to quit, but they are scared. I hope this helps. it is scary, and I was convinced that I would lose everything if I stopped taking adderall. some folks do lose everything, but they gain it back. I think seeing the forest through the trees helps when considering quitting. at this time last month i was in a lot of pain, but i knew that things would get better, and I knew it was worth it.

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1 hour ago, sirod9 said:

so, in case anyone is wanting to quit, but they are scared. I hope this helps. it is scary, and I was convinced that I would lose everything if I stopped taking adderall. some folks do lose everything, but they gain it back. I think seeing the forest through the trees helps when considering quitting. at this time last month i was in a lot of pain, but i knew that things would get better, and I knew it was worth it.

Lots of people DO lose everything, but that usually happens when they fail to quit before the bad things caused by addiction happen.  Nobody needs to reach the "rock bottom" in order to turn their life around.  

thanks for sharing your journey of quitting over the last month, and a huge congratulations for regaining your freedom and sanity! 

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3 hours ago, quit-once said:

Lots of people DO lose everything, but that usually happens when they fail to quit before the bad things caused by addiction happen.  Nobody needs to reach the "rock bottom" in order to turn their life around.  

thanks for sharing your journey of quitting over the last month, and a huge congratulations for regaining your freedom and sanity! 

Thank you! 

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  • 2 years later...

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