When is a better time to quit?

[Regrettingtheyears]

I need advice.

Let me first start off with some background information. 

• I am almost 2 months off adderall (30 mg ER) after being on it for 8 years (since I was 20).
• No, I don't really have ADHD (I exaggerated majorly to my psychiatrist just to get it).
• I have been studying the LSAT (a standardized test to enter law school) for coming up 3 years now.  I have been putting off applying to law schools the last 2 years because I was unsatisfied with my score, but I made a vow that this year, no matter my score, I will apply.  I plan on taking the LSAT in June/July.
• Also, I should mention, studying for the LSAT has become my full time job, meaning I don't work a job; all I do everyday (except weekends) is study.
• Since I have quit adderall, I have been a zombie, eating and sleeping, and no studying at all.
• The LSAT is coming up rapidly and I am feeling the time pressure to resume studies, but I am honestly scared to even try because I don't want to do ANYTHING.  I barely even want to watch tv.
• I told my psychiatrist that I quit cold turkey without consulting with him first and he said that was a bad idea to do that and this isn't the "best" time to quit.  I agree with him in that I already have been thinking about the things he said to me... that now is crunch time to try to get the best LSAT score I can; that I have been studying for YEARS on this test and that quitting adderall so close to test time is crippling me.

After speaking with him, I made up my mind to resume adderall and he refilled my scripts (different doses; 10 mg ER and 20 mg ER to eventually go back to 30 mg ER).  However, I'm still hesitant because when do I truly quit for good?  After my test?? But what about law school?  It is a very intensive make it or break it 3 years of schooling.

Sigh.  Someone give me some advice.

[GettingOffOfIt]

There is never going to be a good time.  I thought the same at your age but stayed on it for 14 more years.  If you are at 2 months off just stick with it.  I am almost at 3 months but I weaned off and it hasn't been as bad for me.  L-Tryosine will help you focus for your exams.  That and a 5 hour energy shot every so often.   You got this.  

[SleepyStupid]

Hi @Regrettingtheyears

welcome to the forums! this sounds like a pretty challenging situation, and I can certainly understand your desire to resume Adderall to get you through this final exam period. here's the thing: there is never going to be a "perfect" time to quit. there may be some times that are better than others, but life tends to get more complicated as time goes on. what I mean is that you need to actively make the time to quit. the best time to do this sounds like now to be honest - you're not working and you're not in school.

On 4/8/2022 at 7:45 PM, Regrettingtheyears said:

I have been studying the LSAT (a standardized test to enter law school) for coming up 3 years now.  I have been putting off applying to law schools the last 2 years because I was unsatisfied with my score, but I made a vow that this year, no matter my score, I will apply.  I plan on taking the LSAT in June/July.

can you not postpone your self imposed deadline? what is more important right now - meeting this deadline, or your health? if you've already been studying for 3 years, perhaps there isn't as much of a "crunch" as you think there needs to be. maybe you just need a couple of more months off the pills to clear your head. 2 months is unfortunately not enough time away from the drug to assess your capabilities.

On 4/8/2022 at 7:45 PM, Regrettingtheyears said:

However, I'm still hesitant because when do I truly quit for good?  After my test?? But what about law school?  It is a very intensive make it or break it 3 years of schooling.

this is the correct line of questioning. I think you would feel a hell of a lot more confident surviving law school if you conquer the LSATs Adderall free.

gl and keep us posted! we're rooting for you (:

[DelaneyJuliette]

You may not be open to hearing this... and that's okay.  But what if u quit and took a year before law school?  In my experience it would make SUCH a difference for you.  It would give your brain time to heal from the post acute withdrawal that is so very real.  I get it though.  There have been times where I didn't feel like stopping (whatever I was doing) was an option.  But one time my friend said to me... "I know u are saying you have to do it (start a program I was ab to start), but would u still do it if u were diagnosed with cancer right now?"  My answer was no, I would not.  And even though that may sound dramatic, it was what I needed to hear at the time to re-evaluate what I'd been telling myself was already a forgone conclusion.  Keep coming back!!

[lawstudent13]

Hey man, I’m a bit late to this post, but I have some unique insight that I think could be helpful.. I quit adderall halfway through my first semester of law school, right after midterms. I was overwhelmed with fear about becoming lazy and less focused, but I made the decision to do it for myself, put my best (adderall free) self into my studies, and accept whatever happened. I ended up jumping from the middle to the top of my class. I actually did the same thing earlier on the lsat. Took a break from adderall and jumped from the 85th to the 97th percentile. I learned to take care of my body and mind, work smarter not harder, and carry a sense of well-being into my work. It was far more enjoyable but also more effective. 
 

edit: I have a lot more to share about this. Feel free to PM

[DelaneyJuliette]

On 4/14/2022 at 11:08 AM, DelaneyJuliette said:

You may not be open to hearing this... and that's okay.  But what if u quit and took a year before law school?  In my experience it would make SUCH a difference for you.  It would give your brain time to heal from the post acute withdrawal that is so very real.  I get it though.  There have been times where I didn't feel like stopping (whatever I was doing) was an option.  But one time my friend said to me... "I know u are saying you have to do it (start a program I was ab to start), but would u still do it if u were diagnosed with cancer right now?"  My answer was no, I would not.  And even though that may sound dramatic, it was what I needed to hear at the time to re-evaluate what I'd been telling myself was already a forgone conclusion.  Keep coming back!!

I can't even believe this was me writing this before.  I feel like i am unable to stop now bc of all i have going on.  Ugh.