ionehitwonderi Posted December 17, 2012 Report Share Posted December 17, 2012 I didn't take the adderall on Friday & actually felt good & wasn't coma like & feelin like dying. (I've been taking 30mg daily for the past year, 60mg before that). But saturday it hit me in the face like a huge brick. I ended up taking it and guess what... i felt even MORE like shit. I literally sat on my chair staring at the wall having NO motivation to do anything.. I did that for 4 hours. I felt "STUCK" if that makes sense. Stuck in a horrible horrible chemical induced hell. Yesterday I took 15mg and felt the same shitty stuck nasty feeling. But once it wore off, I started feeling better! And not only that but I was able to feel my creativity come back... the one thing that is worth everything to me! This is what I wrote: Dehydrated with a killer migraine. Memories engrained I try to kick to the curb. Paint my souls portrait into words...I used to do without an effort. Till I met Esther the go getter. Courtesy of my chemical endeavors. Such a careless fool i was at the time. But I'm ready to forgive her. Paying off the debt I owe. Reaping what I sow. And I've never felt so low. But I've never had such hope either. I keep telling myself it's okay. Even when I'm not okay. I keep telling myself it's okay. Knowing it will manifest one day. Perception is reality. Searched for a remedy in spirituality. Transcend this fake illusion. Hoping it will shift my current state. Can u relate? Transmutate this self hate cuz I'm tired of one too many heartaches... knowing now that I did it to myself. Love will never come ur way if u dont love yourself. And I hate cliche ass quotes, but I awoke to the truth and I finally understand. The energy you give will smack you in the face with a backhand. Put u in ur place where u belong. Leave u stranded in the snow with nothin but a thong on. But I keep it moving with style and grace... I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I want funnel cake - "Getting off the Addies" 12/17/2012 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goodgirl804 Posted December 18, 2012 Report Share Posted December 18, 2012 Hi there, Just wanted to share that this happened to me as well. I stopped taking my pills after a surgery I had because I knew I was gonna be out of it for a few days and sleep most of the time. On the fourth day, I needed to do some work stuff and couldn't focus, so I gave in and took 20 mg. Not only did it NOT help me get my attention straight or get motivated or anything, I felt like absolute sh** after an hour or so. I took the time to really take notice of how bad I felt and how it wasn't worth it. I haven't taken any since, and that was 5 weeks ago. Try to use your experience as a reminder, any time you feel the temptation to take some. Remember how much it DIDN'T help anything, and how it actually made you feel worse. I think that my "slip-up" is actually the thing that has helped me the most with being able to refrain from taking any more. Congratulations on this progress! Michelle 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ionehitwonderi Posted December 18, 2012 Author Report Share Posted December 18, 2012 thank u! I havent taken any today. Im drinking coffee and about to force mysef to get on the eliptical. I feel fatigued yes, but I feel a glimpse of "myself." The fatigue and laziness is 10x better than the shit feeling I felt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyle_Chaos Posted December 18, 2012 Report Share Posted December 18, 2012 I didn't take the adderall on Friday & actually felt good & wasn't coma like & feelin like dying. (I've been taking 30mg daily for the past year, 60mg before that). But saturday it hit me in the face like a huge brick. I ended up taking it and guess what... i felt even MORE like shit. I literally sat on my chair staring at the wall having NO motivation to do anything.. I did that for 4 hours. I felt "STUCK" if that makes sense. Stuck in a horrible horrible chemical induced hell. Yesterday I took 15mg and felt the same shitty stuck nasty feeling. But once it wore off, I started feeling better! And not only that but I was able to feel my creativity come back... the one thing that is worth everything to me! This is what I wrote: Dehydrated with a killer migraine. Memories engrained I try to kick to the curb. Paint my souls portrait into words...I used to do without an effort. Till I met Esther the go getter. Courtesy of my chemical endeavors. Such a careless fool i was at the time. But I'm ready to forgive her. Paying off the debt I owe. Reaping what I sow. And I've never felt so low. But I've never had such hope either. I keep telling myself it's okay. Even when I'm not okay. I keep telling myself it's okay. Knowing it will manifest one day. Perception is reality. Searched for a remedy in spirituality. Transcend this fake illusion. Hoping it will shift my current state. Can u relate? Transmutate this self hate cuz I'm tired of one too many heartaches... knowing now that I did it to myself. Love will never come ur way if u dont love yourself. And I hate cliche ass quotes, but I awoke to the truth and I finally understand. The energy you give will smack you in the face with a backhand. Put u in ur place where u belong. Leave u stranded in the snow with nothin but a thong on. But I keep it moving with style and grace... I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I want funnel cake - "Getting off the Addies" 12/17/2012 You will return to normal. It's almost a blessing, most people take their normalcy for granted..when you start to get it back after being on speed, you really appreciate the simple things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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