Searchingsoul9 Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 Sorry to be posting so damn much. I am annoying myself. I have a question though. It is only day 2 of recovery, but i have gone a week in the past and each time i notice i am VERY hostile. I get frustrated so easily. If my jeans don't fit right or i am having a bad hair day, i FLIP out. I throw things, i scream, i throw a damn tantrum. And i also have been SO on edge with my mom. She is great and all, but EXTREMELY overbearing and she can be a bit condescending and it is driving me off the mother fucking wall. She takes things VERY personally so i can't just say "please leave me alone" or else she will go nuts. I don't want to be a mean, nasty, little snot nosed bitch for the next however many months. How long does this bitch phase usually last??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 I think the way addiction and recovery manifests itself is different for everyone. For me, I was just terribly depressed rather than full of rage - the rage was part of my addiction, rather than my recovery. I wish I had an answer for you, but I can tell you for sure that I hardly ever turn in to the cruella deville that I once used to be on a daily basis. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Searchingsoul9 Posted January 29, 2013 Author Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 I think the way addiction and recovery manifests itself is different for everyone. For me, I was just terribly depressed rather than full of rage - the rage was part of my addiction, rather than my recovery. I wish I had an answer for you, but I can tell you for sure that I hardly ever turn in to the cruella deville that I once used to be on a daily basis. The depression is totally there too. For me it's like i am an angry bitch one minute, then crying over spilled milk the next. It's a rollercoaster for sure. But i just contacted my psychiatrist and cut ties, telling her i am no longer seeing her or taking adderall 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 Do you have SOMEONE to talk to? That's really important. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 i just contacted my psychiatrist and cut ties, telling her i am no longer seeing her or taking adderall GREAT. Alright - you flushed your pills and cut off the doc. You faced some of your hardest challenges this week. How about your primary doc? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SomedayDreamer Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 Sorry to be posting so damn much. I am annoying myself. I have a question though. It is only day 2 of recovery, but i have gone a week in the past and each time i notice i am VERY hostile. I get frustrated so easily. If my jeans don't fit right or i am having a bad hair day, i FLIP out. I throw things, i scream, i throw a damn tantrum. And i also have been SO on edge with my mom. She is great and all, but EXTREMELY overbearing and she can be a bit condescending and it is driving me off the mother fucking wall. She takes things VERY personally so i can't just say "please leave me alone" or else she will go nuts. I don't want to be a mean, nasty, little snot nosed bitch for the next however many months. How long does this bitch phase usually last??? SoulSearching9 The second week, I did notice some major crab ass moods (usually mornings) where I felt like throwing tantrums over tiny frustrations (low dopamine?? IDK) Have you been smoking a lot fewer cigarettes since quitting addie? Could it be nicotine fit be exacerbating the withdrawal? I wasn't planning to quit smoking just yet, but I did because cigarettes just weren't as "good" anymore and I'd feel like falling asleep after every smoke. So I got nicotine patches and noticed the raging moods got a lot better. No cigarettes for 6 days now-- I don't even miss it, it's crazy how the compulsion to smoke diminished when I quit adderall. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sky Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 your brain n body is like a science experiment right now- chemicals n hormones all out of whack. it'll all normalize in time, give it time, n prob the best thing to do with moms is tell her! "yo momma I'm sorry I'm being so nutty I stopped taking adderall and it's wreaking havoc on my system... bear with me please..." or something along those lines. bitch phase officially lasts 10 days. do stuff to release energy and sweat when you're up to it. don't give in or up, you got this, things'll get better soon and then they'll be waaay better than before or ever.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Searchingsoul9 Posted January 29, 2013 Author Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 Do you have SOMEONE to talk to? That's really important. Do you have SOMEONE to talk to? That's really important. At this point in time, no. I am trying to find a new counselor who specializes in eating disorders, but it's been a process Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Searchingsoul9 Posted January 29, 2013 Author Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 GREAT. Alright - you flushed your pills and cut off the doc. You faced some of your hardest challenges this week. How about your primary doc? My Primary care doctor is looking into putting me on welbutrin. And i am trying to find a new counselor that specializes in eating disorders, but it is taking some times :/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashley6 Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 You're taking some major steps to getting well both with adderall and your eating disorder! I think the importance of dealing with your eating disorder will become even more of a priority now that you're clean, because you tend not to give a shit about taking care or yourself when using. I ruined my teeth on adderall, didn't work out, didn't take care of the daily maintenance of my life in general, ate like shit (still kind of do), but you get what I'm saying. The mood swings were really prevalent for me when I quit. I wasn't so much angry, just cried at the drop of a hat, but I've never been much of an angry person. I don't know if I mask that emotion or what. Your body will be all out of whack for awhile with your dopamine levels being all messed up for sure. I don't know if this is any help, besides to tell you you're a normal quitter You're doing this thing!!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motivation_Follows_Action Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 Finding a good therapist is such a crapshoot. I had a really amazing shrink/therapist but there was a conflict of interest with my work so I had do find another one. Both of us were pretty bummed about it as he liked working with me, too. He used to say "if you're still coming to see me in 6 months then I haven't done my job properly". I hate the way some shrinks want you to see them on a weekly basis for the rest of your life. Parasites. Don't get me started... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FALCON Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 <a href=" Searchingsoul9 Hey baby girl your doing OK talk to your mom sit down at the kitchen table and give her the heads up let her no how your feeling and that you will be a bitch for about 2 weeks let her know how much you love her and appreciate her support during your withdrawal you will be surprised how much compassion and understanding you will receive from her jest by having a normal conversation with out any hostility or sarcasm involved. Your head is finally in the right place all your quit adderall friends are proud of you you are showing a great deal of matcherity .Please jest hang in there 10 days two weeks you will look back and be proud of what you have accompliced. FALCON 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea Posted January 29, 2013 Report Share Posted January 29, 2013 I'm more of a depressive although at times I get very impatient. The depression I'm just trying to tolerate because eventually it subsides. I have noticed some brief moments of lightness in silly things like watching the pets play and certain expressions like "brain fart" ... go figure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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