Renascido

Ohhhh Yeah. I remember how frustrating this was when I quit about 8 months ago. It took me about a solid month to feel like I was moving regularly again. Just another pesky side effect that'll pass in time Edit: Oh wow, had no idea this thread was about three and a half years old. I hope your recovery has gone wonderfully and that you have remained clean

Hey man, sorry for the late response. I've stuck to the regimen pretty hardcore over the last month or so. Honestly, I haven't noticed much of a difference up until the past 2 weeks. I doubt it's really to do with the supplements I've been taking, but I figure it doesn't hurt to be taking them (within limits). Like you said, I think I've likely been feeling better due to the natural progression of abstaining from adderall. I actually just hit my 8 month mark yesterday, so that's pretty great. I think I noticed a real turning point at around 7 months. Before then, I really couldn't tell ANY difference from month to month. I hope to continue riding this train. Let's see how much we can heal. Good luck to your brotha

Don't compare apples to oranges. You want some motivation? I've been there. I've been one of those people that has suffered through cancer. Growing up, I battled a bone cancer in my neck that ultimately took three years and two surgeries to defeat. That same year that I overcame cancer, my mother, father, and uncle all struggled with cancer as well. My Uncle wasn't lucky enough to see another day, but we're stronger for what we went through. Here's the thing though: I'm no hero for overcoming what I went through. Without a doubt that was hard, but as I've mentioned before in a previous post, I have never struggled with anything more in my life than what I am currently struggling with, and that is finding myself after quitting adderall. So don't belittle your struggles. This is not some walk in the park. Sure, it may seem like something "little" when you compare it to other major life events, but none of those life events physically alter your brain's ability to handle life like adderall does. Cut yourself some slack because 5 months is a huge deal. So many other people would have gotten caught back into the vicious cycle of using again by this point. It will get better; you have to believe that. The most important thing to do in this fight is be kind to yourself. Because in life, no matter the obstacle, if you've forgotten how to love yourself, you're fighting a losing battle. Press forward, it's the only direction you have to go. Good luck to you, brother

Nice find. I just read the study. I was a little disappointed by the lack of thoroughness throughout the study. There were a lot of details that I consider pertinent to repeating the study that were omitted. The exact doses, number of doses, and ingestion times weren't really covered. Fortunately I was able to find some of those details in the references.Since there were so many treatments, and none of them were isolated, I'd like to see more similar research to help understand what factors are definitively contributing towards the statistical improvements. Still, this is absolutely great because so much of what gets passed around on the internet is based on anecdotal evidence, so having this with some empirical data to support the claims is nice. Great preliminary research. I'm going to attempt a similar personal regime, and I'll report back with some of my findings. Thanks for sharing!

Really great to hear about your progression. You're definitely improving and adapting to the lack of artificial stimulation. I'm glad you're doing it in the way that works best for you. Remember the best plan of attack is the plan that you stick to. It doesn't matter how fast you get there, as long as you're headed in the right direction. Keep up the great work.

Perfect. I just hit 6 months on the 2nd of this month . Can't wait for that year mark though

First of all, welcome to the forums. Your story sounds very similar to mine. Although I wasn't using as often as you, I was on and off for about 3 years time, with a consistent use for the final 6 months or so. Prior to taking adderall, I was not someone you'd describe as having anxiety. Although I did struggle with depression bouts, it was nothing out of the ordinary. But since quitting ~6 months ago, I've gone through quite possibly the most difficult 6 months of my life. Battling through cancer twice doesn't even compare to how difficult this struggle has been. But by pushing through and pushing through, I have finally begun to see light at the end of the tunnel. The intense "oh my God, I'm dying" or "I'll never get better" anxiety has lessened as of late. I've had a decrease in brain fog. Things, overall, are getting better. And just as you've described, there are days where the symptoms come back full force, but that's just part of the process. During post acute withdrawal syndrome (PAWS), you won't heal in a linear fashion. You will begin to notice good days sprinkled about your bad days, but as you progress you'll begin to notice the good days become more frequent until eventually the good days outnumber the bad days. The thing to keep in mind is this: it takes time. On average, PAWS can last 2 years. Just roll with the punches and let your brain do its thing. You're not going crazy. Rest assured, what you're going through is completely normal. As for the stimulant supplements and Wellbutrin, I would recommend tapering off of both. It is only my opinion, but I think anything that is going to alter your dopamine activity is going to hinder the natural progression in your healing process. Adderall has completely ravaged your dopamine basal levels, receptors, and transporters. Your brain is hard at work at repairing these mechanisms, but if some outside substance is altering their levels, it makes it more difficult to repair what is wrong. Again, this is only my opinion. Others on this site have healed just fine while using caffeine as a supplement, but in my opinion, I think it may play some role in the length of your recovery. But also, on top of this, stimulants and anxiety do not mesh well. If you are struggling with anxiety, I recommend limiting your stimulant intake. Both caffeine and Wellbutrin have been known to affect anxiety levels. I would keep the Wellbutrin on hand for days where you absolutely need a pick me up. Just try to use it more sparingly. Stick to a clean diet, strong exercise regime, and adequate amounts of sleep. Keep pushing. It will get better, brotha. Feel free to message me if you're ever in need of a talk.

Despite what some people may lead you to believe, the brain is entirely capable of making a full recovery, but things obviously vary from individual to individual. There is a plethora of scientific papers regarding the brain's innate, yet 'limited,' ability to recover from stimulant abuse (although often on other mammals, such as rats), but there are several things wrong with what they purport. First off, very few, if any, of these scientific papers follow the patients' recovery for longer than fourteen months. Second off, most of these papers focus on methamphetamine abuse. Although the two substances are literally just one constituent different in terms of chemical structure, there is a difference in how the two chemicals are metabolized.Third, as I said before, many of the "research subjects" are often rats or monkeys. Fourth, many of the tests subjected the animals to absurd doses of amphetamine. In a study conducted on vervet monkeys, 2 x 2 mg/kg doses were used on the animals. For me, that would translate to taking 336 mg of adderall daily for a few weeks. And lastly, there is no way to directly measure the amount of dopamine being metabolized by the brain, so the studies instead use indirect measurements such as the density of dopamine transporters present. Now, even with ALL of that said, despite the flaws behind translating this to human use, the test subjects still showed improvement; it just took time. In one study conducted on methamphetamine abusers (humans) that I found, there was some great improvement among some of the subjects after a very long period of abstinence; we're talking fourteen months. Even then, with the subjects that showed marginal improvements, there are still plenty of reasons behind why some were only able to heal to a certain extent. The researchers were at the mercy of the test subjects. It is impossible to account for any relapsing that may have occurred. Obviously any of the patients that may have relapsed would show considerably less improvement. Secondly, the amount of abuse and the duration of abuse was highly variable between the patients. Someone who abused the drug for ten years would likely heal much slower than someone who abused the drug for say three months. And lastly, the sample pool was very limited. Also, like I said earlier, the indirect measuring of dopamine transporters for dopamine activity is inconclusive. To sum it up, please please please do not let anyone (or yourself) scare you into thinking that the damage incurred is permanent. The damage is not permanent. The brain is highly plastic. Always remember that the brain controls the mind, but the mind also controls the brain. They work together in harmony. What I mean is that if you scare yourself into believing you cannot heal, you will develop very unhealthy neural pathways; you will be utilizing the brain's amazing neural plasticity for harm. On the other hand, if you do everything to your ability to heal yourself, you will help accelerate the process. What I mean by that is practicing "in the moment" exercises. Train your brain to relearn some of its natural cognitive abilities. As hard as it may be, you need to have a proactive approach rather than a passive approach. Good luck to you. Vervet monkey source: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9359594

Hey there, microbiologist here (not that adderall has anything to do with microbes ). Essentially adderall works in multiple ways. First off, it mimics dopamine, epinephrine, and norepinephrine in chemical structure. On top of this, it also increases the amount of dopamine that is secreted between neurons, which is responsible for the artificial feelings of euphoria you felt during just about anything you did while on adderall. Dopamine is the driving factor behind our motivation; it is our reward system. Just ate your favorite ice cream? Dopamine is released. Just conquered a test that you have been studying for for weeks? Dopamine is released. Just had sex with your partner? Dopamine is released. Just took adderall? AN IMMENSE amount of dopamine is released.That's why when you took adderall, it didn't really matter what you did, it just felt good. Things that were perhaps uninteresting to you before the drug suddenly seemed interesting. Problem is, when you take adderall, in attempt to maintain homeostasis (balance things out), your body will reduce the amount of dopamine being produced as well as being released. That is why when you stop taking adderall, you likely experienced a crash where you were unable to feel. After maybe a half day, you probably felt normal again. With extended use of adderall, however, some of the dopamine transporters and receptors throughout your brain can actually be damaged through neurotoxicity. That's why, like most of us on this site, we experience a severe feeling of readjustment after quitting. The good news is neuroplasticity does exist; your brain has the ability to adapt, and the main requirement for this is time. Unfortunately there are no catalysts to accelerate the process other than adequate rest, clean dieting, and exercise. Some supplements, such as L-tyrosine, can help alleviate some of the symptoms, but nothing is going to substitute for time. This also explains why certain things that didn't seem so appealing before seem quite appealing now, such as alcohol. Alcohol actually works on dopamine as well, although in an entirely different cellular mechanism. Try to refrain from taking too much of anything to fill the dopamine void left by adderall. Just be patient. To help clarify between serotonin and dopamine, both of these neurotransmitters are responsible for well-being. Neurotransmitters work in a complex, tree-like manner so a lot of intertwining does occur. An imbalance in either neurotransmitter can cause depression. In your case, you more than likely are feeling the way you are due to the dopamine depletion caused by adderall. Dopamine depression is characterized as very anhedonic (life lacking the spark it once had), a severe lack of motivation, lethargy, inability to focus, and often anxiety. Serotonin-based depression, on the other hand, is often a feeling of blues; everything in life seems as if it has had a cast of gray drapes placed over it. The two are honestly quite similar, but there are some distinct differences. It is possible for your serotonin levels to be insufficient due to natural causes (like many depression episodes are), but they are likely not anything to be concerned over. They will rebalance themselves once you begin to feel a spark in your life again. Once you're able to start enjoying the things you used to enjoy, serotonin levels, as well as other neurotransmitters, will begin to balance in harmony once again. Just give it time. I commend you on rejecting the antidepressants from your doctor. The majority of antidepressants work on your serotonin levels, and as I have mentioned before, your serontonin levels are not likely the culprit here. Stay strong and take great care.

I'm very glad to hear you're making the commitment to rid yourself of adderall for good. It's certainly not the easy way out, but it's the right way out from all of the troubles you're speaking of. I know exactly what you mean about being over critical when it comes to relationships. Adderall ruined any sort of intimacy I had. It took me about two months to see the old me coming back, in terms of not being over critical on girls, friends, or family. The intense roller-coaster of a ride that you're going through right now is just part of the process. If at all possible, give yourself at least two weeks to do absolutely nothing. Be kind to yourself. If you feel like sleeping, sleep it out. Don't feel like seeing anyone? Then don't. Grab some warm popcorn and watch some Netflix. Just do anything to distract yourself and keep reminding yourself that it is temporary. It's a slow process, but I guarantee you that it is worth it and that it does get easier. Take care of yourself, brother.

You will be amazed at how well you handle all things in life without any of the meds you were originally prescribed. I'm not saying it won't be difficult, but once you get the swing of things (like riding a bike), it'll progressively get easier and easier. You'll learn coping mechanisms; you'll learn what really makes you happy (rather than taking a pill that leads you to believe you like everything); you'll learn what it feels like to actually feel again, and you'll likely be far more empathetic than you were while using. Also, don't worry if you don't remember who that person was before you took the drugs! The neural pathways that you developed throughout your life, sans adderall, have not vanished. I guarantee they're still there, and the good news is the neural pathways that you are going to develop during your recovery, such as coping mechanisms, will stick with you as well. So, if anything, you'll begin to become an even stronger version of yourself. And even if you're not feeling like yourself after a few weeks or a few months, don't panic! All of the pieces are definitely falling into place. Patience and acceptance is all you need. Feel free to send me a message if you ever need some more encouraging words. Take great care of yourself!

The debilitating anxiety is exactly what got me to quit that terrible drug as well. Just rest easy knowing that it is drug related. I know you said you were originally struggling with anxiety before the drug, but rest easy knowing that your anxiety hasn't worsened for good. When you quit the drug the level of panic you have been feeling should slowly begin to fade. You'll also begin to feel deep emotion again, which is a beautiful thing. Just remember to take it day by day. Some days will be more difficult than others, but don't fret; each month progressively gets easier! Great to meet you.

On a side note, I want to say it's very nice to finally get to talk to you guys. It almost feels like I'm meeting celebrities in a way haha. In your own regard, you guys are all professionals of quitting adderall. For nearly five months now people like AlwaysAwesome, LilTex, Cassie, Greg, BeHereNow, QuitOnce, GrumpyCat (or Dogedog, I think he's constantly changing names), and so many others that I forgot to name have given me the strength I've needed through some really rough days. Just want to say thanks for contributing all that you do. It says a lot when it's been years since you quit, but you still actively logon to contribute to those who really need the help. Thanks to all of you.

LilTex, I think it really does have a lot to do with that. Here's why: instead of just going with the flow and realizing that I'm not going to be able to converse as effectively and as effortlessly as I did on adderall (or even pre-adderall just yet; it takes time), I constantly get lost in my mind, wondering if the other person knows that I'm slightly retarded at conversing. Then I start to worry and before I know it, I'm having a mini-panic attack in my mind. I think I've let it get out of hand; it's to the point where I'm worrying before I'm even conversing. This has got me to thinking. I think the root of my debilitating anxiety has proliferated the problem to other facets of life, to the point that I'm uncomfortable in nearly every setting. I'd say about 85% of my thoughts per day are wondering whether I'll be normal again. Anyways, I think that realizing that is really going to help me progress. Because in all honesty, I can feel some real improvement in terms of mental clarity, energy, and I'm beginning to feel emotion again, so I just need to remind myself that constantly thinking about whether I'm getting better is really what is making me worse by causing all of this unnecessary anxiety.

I know it's not me missing the high. I honestly didn't have much trouble quitting the drug, and I've experienced absolutely no cravings to go back to the drug. I know some people have experienced psychosis when coming off of the drug, so what I'm thinking is that I didn't get to the point where I'm hearing voices, but I did get to the point where I'm feeling panic. So if there was a spectrum, on the extreme side there would be delusional thinking and voices and on the moderate side would be discomfort and extreme anxiety. I'm not sure that makes sense to anyone, but it's what let's me sleep at night haha. The good news is yesterday was one of the first days in awhile where I felt like my old pre-adderall self. I noticed it after my 5 mile hike.

Hi everyone, this is my first time officially posting on this website, but I have been lurking in the shadows for well over four months now. A little background: I began using on a fairly regular basis about two years ago, but it wasn't until 2015 that I let the using become a habit, where I often would take adderall on a daily basis for studies. By the time summer of 2015 had come around, I had switched from 30 mg IRs to 40-50 mg Vyvanse. In brief, I had one very abnormal experience where I felt extremely anxious on the drug, which had never really happened. After that experience, whenever I took vyvanse it was never really the same. I decided I needed to quit, so on September 2nd, 2015, I took my final pill. Everything was sort of smooth sailing for the most part. I was expecting to be sleeping in 14 hours a day, and I had a few months before my fall quarter would begin, so it wasn't really a big deal. Anhedonia sucks, but I can deal with that. What happened maybe one month later is what concerns me. I developed this overbearing sense of uneasiness. I'm not talking about anxiety, where you can't get your mind off of bad thoughts that are beyond control. I'm also not even talking about panic attacks; I've never had one of those. I'm talking about a "feeling" of angst that is quite debilitating. I am uncomfortable with my surroundings, even when I'm familiar with them. I am uncomfortable in restaurants, the movie theater, the grocery store, you name it. Beyond just being socially awkward after quiting, I am pretty terrified to talk to others due to this overwhelming sense of uneasiness. I want to emphasize that this NEVER happened to me before using. I have never had any difficulty talking to strangers; I actually think I was more on the extroverted end of the spectrum prior to taking the drug. I studied abroad in China, Scotland, and Thailand before using the drug, and I had absolutely no difficulty adjusting to my surroundings or making friends then. I am 100% sure that this began after quitting. I have read a lot on this site about people feeling anxious after quitting, but like I described before, I am not sure this is best described as simply feeling anxious. Has anyone else went through this? If so, can you offer some input as to how long things took to settle down? And if you took any measures to help cope with these symptoms. Thanks!