Rev&Rush

Day 38 & unhappy I've gained 15 pounds. I feel bad writing that cause I don't want anyone to consider staying on this stuff If they are fearful of gaining weight. This is my experience. I'm sure other people are diciplined and won't eat like a horse. I'm tired & have stopped caring about being productive. I have some very important meetings and would love to crawl in bed and watch Netflix through all of them. I just don't care. I don't want to see anyone, talk to anyone, or do anything. I can't be bothered. I just don't care. I don't remember to do things so I get grief about that. But I don't care. I'm hoping people just stop asking me. My own complaining annoys me. I know I can't live like this and I'm seriously considering going back. What's worth it. I'm posting here cause I'm lost. Im just lost.

For some reason I can't play the video. Can you provide more info so I can google it. Like names & stuff?

Oh, the fish oil is omega 3 & 6. Not just wrung out fishes. Go to a health food store and get the good stuff. Well worth it.

I had the same thing. I started taking LOTS of vitamin D & STRONG fish oil. The vit d helps with the aches. The fish oil helps with brain stuff. It worked for me but check with your dr. I am not one, so you mint want to ask him or her.

Me too

I have used journaling with very troubled students in my class and everytime it has proven effective. Please know that they are 6 & 7 years old. I used gratitude journaling. But it still worked. I believe that the hardest work we do is the work we do on ourselves.

I know. It's a huge bummer. But in this time of testing tells all, no one cares about the creative development of our future. I fought to have her instruction modified so she wouldn't have to take pills, but it fell on deaf ears. It's a quick fix. I just hope she doesn't end up here someday.

Oh! This reminds me of one of my students. Before she was put on ADD meds she would give me these beautiful elaborate pictures she drew. Then they put her on meds, and I got lots of neatly written letters asking how I am doing and her plan for the day. No more pictures. It saddened me greatly.

I could actually hear my fathers voice when I read that.

Day 18. Still going. Advice to others: do the first week cold turkey when you don't have a demanding schedule. If there is some flexibility in your day, it helps. I was worried before my day 1, that I wasn't going to be able to do as little as possible. But I chose a week tthat I knew wasnt going to be that demanding to begin with. It's weird, but I used the adderall to help organize my cold turkey. Kind of a chicken before the egg, or turkey in this case. After the second week, my brain seems to be healing, so I'm able to organize myself on my own. Since towards the end there the adderall was no longer working as well as it did 8 or 9 years ago when it made me feel like Superman, I think I am doing an ok job getting my shit together, post-pills. Today my all time favorite part of not being on adderall is my even temper. I could have flown off the handle SO MANY times today, and I didnt. I actually gained some perspective.

For now I will track here. Day 17. Yay! The hardest part was day 2, day 4, day 6. I don't know why those were tough (& they are even days) but they were really hard. I actually felt physically sick on day 4 but looking back on those days, I think it was the amount of sugar & chocolate I was eating. If anyone is starting out, get a big sack or Hershey's kisses or even better, dove chocolate. For some reason i needed them. It was well worth the calories cause now I'm here. I feel totally fine. I take a bunch of vitamins now, & that could be why I'm fine too. But the chocolate helped. I smoke, but had much less of an urge to smoke while not on adderall so the chocolate may have subbed in. If you are in your single digit days, try it. Im no longer strapping a feed bag of chocolate to my face, but I am finding little tinfoil wrappers still, all over my classroom. The second week was mostly lack of motivation. It's frustrating but it did not cause nearly the same amount of anxiety as when I was on adderall. When I tool adderall & started to procrastinate, the anxiety from that used to make me so... Fearful. I would shake & cry & then I'd take more. Cause that makes sense. Now, if it doesn't get done, then the world does not end. Really... It doesn't. But my home is messier, my classroom is a bit more disorganized and I stop mid sentence almost always. But guess what? The world does not end. I know, I'm surprised as much as all of you are.

A calculator is cool, but maybe another section to count & write. Like tell your story, post everything here... Count your days. Tally up & reflect. I don't know. I'm really ill tempered today amd easily frustrated. I just don't want to keep repeating myself trying to remember what the hell I talked about where. I can't even find my physical shit right now. Much less my cyber crap. I'm going to sleep.

Inspiring. Thanking for being committed to yourself & for committing to sharing your road with us.

We need a place to count days. I have stuff on different threads but I would like a place to put stuff so I can document my days and adequately update anyone who wishes to read where I am. But for now I'm cutting an pasting. Is there a place to put a day count for yourself and reflect in writing? I dunno. Maybe I misses it. But here's what I wrote in another thread. Sorry for the repitition. Day 15. Just checking in. I'm ok. Tired & fat. But not popping pills. I'm off to get some sleep, my old friend. One more reason I'm happy I'm off. I can sleep, without having horrible anxiety dreams, without another handful of anxiety pills, without grinding my teeth. Sleep... With all my weird twisted dreams. Not always scary. Yawn. Good night.

Day 15. Just checking in. I'm ok. Tired & fat. But not popping pills. I'm off to get some sleep, my old friend. One more reason I'm happy I'm off. I can sleep, without having horrible anxiety dreams, without another handful of anxiety pills, without grinding my teeth. Sleep... With all my weird twisted dreams. Not always scary. Yawn. Good night.