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Cannot continue like this


swearengen

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I've been hooked on adderall for about 7 years. I began taking it for school, and it became a recreational habit. Though it has helped with my studying, i also notice i get side tracked into doing other irrelevant tasks. Long story short, the trend i'm in now is...

1.Get scrip - 20mg (30)

2. I go through it within a week and a half - (abusing it heavily, even when i do not have work)

3. Once i'm done, i usually go into a depression mode for about a week or so..irritable, extremely fatigued and crazy appetite.

4. About a week later i start up working out again...makes me feel good and i usually get back into a good routine of sleep, work, gym etc.

Sometimes i'm in this good routine for weeks, other times i'll be chasing my next appt with the doctor. On the other hand, I've been able to go without it for months at a time -(so i know i'm capable to quit). For some reason no matter how long i'm off it, something triggers the urge to go get it. And bottom line is its killing me financially, health wise and i think mentally. I've become extremely paranoid, anxiety and i am impulsive with the wrong things. To be honest, i dont even need it for college i'm able to study if i put my mind to it. I'm just tired of this trend, i want off it...i dont want to be doing this the rest of my life...its taken up way to much of my life already. As far as health reasons go, I've had some very bad feelings in my chest after abusing, my heart pinching... numbness sensation in my head and face. I'm worried that if i continue along this trend i'll do permanent damage. Or worst...god forbid. I also only ever smoke cigarettes when i'm taking addys. Off it, i cant stand them.

Anyway, I've got two pills left...and the cycle is ending. I want out.

Could really use some advice from people in the same boat.

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Welcome my friend you are a true and blue Adderall addict it’s like when you’re broke two days after you just got paid what a fucked up feeling. I feel for you it looks like you need to hit the bottom of the pit at zombie land or end up in the ER of your favorite hospital looking up at the selling and saying to yourself how the fuck did I get here brother you need to make up your mind to quit or not to quit that is the question. Make up your mind do you have what it takes will power it’s all in your hands bro we can’t help you if you do not help yourself first

Your friend FALCON

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So, what is your plan to make this time different? Have you cancelled your script?

I havent touched those last two pills, i took a GNC sports Vitamin (twice a day) and funny enough i mustered enough energy to workout. I woke up pretty refreshed this morning and i plan to do the same today. Good question about the scrip..i'm wondering if i should call the doctor and tell him I've been abusing? is that a bad idea?? Either way i better act fast before the addy demons come back....

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I think telling your doctor anything that will make them stop prescribing you is the best idea for your quit. Maybe not suicidal, because they have an obligation to commit you, if you tell them that, as far as I know. I told my doctor the anxiety was just too much, and the side effects were outweighing the benefits, as I broke down in tears. Go for it today while you're remembering the adderall for what it is, poison.

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I think telling your doctor anything that will make them stop prescribing you is the best idea for your quit. Maybe not suicidal, because they have an obligation to commit you, if you tell them that, as far as I know. I told my doctor the anxiety was just too much, and the side effects were outweighing the benefits, as I broke down in tears. Go for it today while you're remembering the adderall for what it is, poison.

I agree. And if you call the doc ASAP and cancel your prescription subscription you can keep those two pills as a souveneer of your addiction, because you won't be able to replace them. Good job so far staying off them. You have proved to yourself you can resist the temptation, and that is really, really huge. Good luck and do keep us posted on your progress!

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Hi, welcome to the forums. You're in the right place. You are surrounded by people just like you, who have felt frustrated at themselves, the drug, confused, alone, annoyed, angry, sad and sometimes all those things at once! Quitting adderall is just such a difficult thing to do.

None of us really understands why it's such a bitch to get over and why it takes SO BLOODY LONG (ok, so yeah our brains need to produce some chemical on their own and the brain is plastic so hurry up and do it already), but the psychological aspects of adderall addiction are really unique, and ALL of us struggle from time to time with wanting to relapse, and most of us have relapsed once or twice.

The thing you said though that maybe you should explore a bit though is why you have returned to adderall repeatedly. What is it that has been missing in your life that you think ONLY adderall can fill? It's only when you can answer that question that you will be really free from the drug.

We know you can do it, we are here fighting that same fight, so feel free to bitch and moan and celebrate with us as much as you like!

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I havent touched those last two pills, i took a GNC sports Vitamin (twice a day) and funny enough i mustered enough energy to workout. I woke up pretty refreshed this morning and i plan to do the same today. Good question about the scrip..i'm wondering if i should call the doctor and tell him I've been abusing? is that a bad idea?? Either way i better act fast before the addy demons come back....

By the way, beware the false placebo effect. Don't mean to be a debbie downer, but...

1) adderall takes a while to clear itself from your system (up to 72 hours in some cases), so your energy may be a residual effect; and

2) vitamins are known to be v effective, but only after sustained long term use and not after just taking 2 pills. It's likely your mood enhancement may not have been just because of the vitamins.

But don't stop taking them!!

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I feel the same exact way you do, you pretty much just summed up how I feel! I've also gone long periods of time without it but always came back to it and I want out.

I think going to your doctor would be a great idea! They may even ween you off of it, if they believe you'll take the new dose the right way so you don't have as severe symptoms of withdrawal. but if you say you're suicidal he may send you to a hospital if he feels that you're a danger to yourself. So I def wouldn't recommend saying that unless you really are..

Good for you for wanting to kick the habit and if you every want to talk, feel free to message me. <3

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