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Five months clean! :)


EstherEmily

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Five months clean. It feels pretty good. The cravings have went down, slowly but surely, these last couple months. After month three things seemed to get a little easier.

I still tend to dream about Adderall, almost nightly. It's something I haven't been able to escape completely, but I knew this wouldn't be easy. I also am a bit of an "emotional cutter" - I'll find myself looking at photos on FB of when I was out tweaking with my friends, and I really miss it. My friends and I all had scripts and such, and these girls are still good friends of mine, but I've cut contact a lot. They know I'm done with it, and it's something we don't discuss. I refuse to be around it.

Though it's been easier for me than most, since I quit when I found out I was pregnant. So relapse is not an option, and for that I am grateful.

So, I just wanted to check in. Although I'm still struggling, it's definitely not as bad as it was.

Every day it gets easier, and that's something I can smile about.

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Thanks for coming back and letting us know how you are doing.  Congrats on the coming baby and 5 months with a no relapse option is as good as it gets.  It's hard to leave your tweaker buddies behind.  My addie buddies were also really good friends and I vowed not to give up those friendships due to quitting.  But I found out that we had less and less in common with time after quitting.  Their world still resolves around drug use and my world wants none of that lifestyle,  so we have gradually gone different ways.  I wish you the best of luck in your life beyond Adderall.

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