Dear Wellbutrin, Thank you.

[Kathleen]

If you've read my up and down roller coaster ride with amphetamine drugs for the past 6 years, then you know how horribly I've been struggling with "quitting"(aka breaks) and then back onto the grind.

I think I'm just freaking over Adderall. It's tiring to even think about. I called my parents upset again after feeling depressed, fatigue, like the whole world was dark...and wondering "Does this mean I need Adderall or is this how withdrawal feels...?"

MMMM...I couldn't stop feeling so tired, laid in bed for weeks feeling down about a broken heart,reflecting the damage I'd caused on/off/on/off Adderall and I finally was just like.."This shit isn't working for me, my life is not going to continue like this." I went to the doctor, told her how I felt, she told me I needed to stay on the Adderall in moderation. (Hell no) I told her I wasn't there for a narcotic...but for an SSRI. She diagnosed me as "clinically depressed"(after some questioning) and I started taking the 150mg of Wellbutrin. I felt terrible the first few days--like nauseous drugged out and fatigue...but after about 6 days...I started feeling-what I identify as-"CLEAR".

My cravings for Adderall haven't been around for a few weeks, and I feel like I'm finally in a mindset that can begin to make rational, adult choices. I've been going to Yoga, thinking about my future in a more creative, peaceful field. I want to find something I am passionate about, something I can wake up and feel like I am contributing to or making a difference. I'm looking into Aveda schools for massage therapy...my degree from Auburn, mmmm...not considering utilizing it any longer.

I don't want to live life going 120 MPH anymore. It's weird, I'm actually focused at work now too without Adderall.

I was initially put on Adderall as a quick fix for my depression, lethargy and mild ADHD. I think if I would have given Wellbutrin a chance back then, I wouldn't be on the road I have been. I believe that my head has been off balance for awhile and I'm feeling things I haven't felt in over a decade...normality. Wellbutrin has been a great help...I feel like it's been leveling me out back into a regular person...and not some strung out junkie on and off Adderall.

<3

[FALCON]

Hay there sister I am glad you have found a antidepressant that works for you it’s a blessing. I have tried numbers of antidepressants for 20 years now sometimes 4 different drugs at one time thats 4 chemicals working on your brain at ones thus this make sense to you it is not logical to me. Butt what do I know I’m not a fuckin shrink I’m jest a depressed person looking for some relief all the deferent medications I have tried worked for a little then stop working on me.

This is called drug resistant depression. I hope wellbutrin will do its job for you in the long run. I know about 4 people that are on wellbutrin they are all satisfied with the results congratulations on your 5 weeks clean this is a millstone in my opinion you have graet sperit Keep it up.

Your friend FALCON

[ashley6]

Kathleen,

I love your post. Love love love.

[Kathleen]

Ashley,

<3 Thank you. Thank you for always being there and helping me through this battle, girl.

[tinybuddha]

Kathleen,

Your post always hit home with me. I found wellbutrin to really help with quitting adderall. I felt very sick when I began, but after I built up to the 300XL the side effects went away. My doctor contributed it in part to the brand of generic wellbutrin. I was reluctant to try it because I had been on cymbalta for awhile; it was not a good experience and pretty horrible to get off. I quit adderall and cymbalta(had to do a very slow taper) around the same time. I tried to quit ambien not that long ago and it was a nightmare. The extreme exhaustion really triggered my feeling of needing adderall. I felt very tired but slept only about 6hr in 7days. Also, other stress factors like moving twice, fiances, and relationship drama played a big role. The last few weeks I have slipped back into taking the adderall. No where near the crazy high doses that I was taking before but still it fills me with self loathing that after all of this my weakness won out. It has been a great feeling not having to stress at the end of the month about not having enough pills. This last visit with my pysch.(who really is all about staying on the pills) after discussing feeling depressed again he suggested increasing my dose from 300XL(that I have been on a little under a year) to 450mg. I am not sure I want to do that. I am going to try to give it more time and see if I can do it without. I am feeling very hopeless right now. My degree that I killed myself for I am not able to use right now and feel the time ticking by on that situation as I still need to take my boards 4years later. I feel like I wasted the last 6years of my life and have nothing to show for it. It makes me feel very ashamed on a regular basis. It is like after the initial struggle of just focusing on getting off the pills to a level I didn't feel like I was going to really destroy myself or even die has been reached(it took over a year) I don't know how to start putting the pieces back together. It was difficult before but now without the crutch of the pills I feel lost and like just getting through the day without a pill can't be the rest of my life. I feel my self slipping back into isolating(a major issue of mine with adderall abuse) I am going to try to come back on the forum every day to hold myself accountable and not feel so alone in the struggle as I try to get this in check before it spirals out of control again. I pretty much left my whole life behind(which in many ways was a good thing but not entirely) when I decided to get serious about quitting. Does anyone have any advice on how to start living in the real world again after addiction? I feel lost right now. Sorry, I rambled completely off the topic of wellbutrin! Anyway, I think the wellbutrin will really help Kathleen. Your in my prayers and continue to be an inspiration to me with my struggle to become whole again after adderall. Your candor about the set backs helps more than you know. Thank you.

[Evie25]

I'm on a combination of Lexapro and Wellbutrin. Honestly, I don't think I'd have been able to quit the adderall without the SSRIs (5 months clean now). I think part of the problem is that I was using adderall for my depression, which obviously was a bad idea.

I don't feel SSRIs are addictive at all-have been on and off them for most of my life and it's never been a problem going off.

I think more people should consider this option when quitting. Not all drugs are bad

[Kathleen]

You're right--the nature of an SSRI is completely different than a NARCOTIC.

I don't think I would be where I am right now without the Wellbutrin. My head was severely screwed after years of Adderall. I'm all for medicine..but of course I've had to take measures in many areas to get better off Adderall on my own...the Wellbutrin has aided in bringing my head back to normality.

I highly recommend this option to anyone who is still struggling with Adderall.

[zentopia7]

Hi, I'm new to this site, did a google search for "Adderall withdrawal wellbutrin" to see if there's truly hope for me to battle this, and the link to this post came up, I fortunately asked my psychiatrist a few days ago if I could get a script for Wellbutrin SR 150mg once or twice a day and your post has given me hope, I actually also saw a youtube video on methamphetamine addiction treatment and in some states the instant release wellbutrin is approved for withdrawal/cravings, not sure why the instant release version, anyway I am on my last 5 capsules of Adderall XR and I am so happy I'm finally going to be off this stuff, I'd run out too soon and crave the day when I'd get my next refill, the stuff should be banned in all countries I think, its poison. I also got a bottle of DL-Phenylalanine to get my brain to cope with dopamine withdrawal, its an amino acid that converts into Tyrosine then from that into dopamine, so it's great for many applications, depression, ADHD, amphetamine and nicotine cravings even. Glad you made it off the stuff, I've done it before now I just have to stick with my current psychiatrist so I don't go to another one looking for adderall from another one. I've made an early appt next week to tell her I want to quit the adderall and also going to send an email first, this is the first step, next is to follow through and have faith that I will get through this and be healed. Thanks.