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  • 2 weeks later...

Hmm.. I definitely made it into stage 7a/b. It was by far the darkest time in my life. What a great reminder of where that path leads.

Paradoxically, I did gain weight during that stage, and now it's coming off.

I also haven't been sleeping as well as I was. I keep wondering why, and if it has something to do with quitting. Stage 7b, the idea that my brain was so burned out I was producing extra sleep chemicals to rest before returning to hell, makes a lot of sense..... I used to have very long, comatose sleep sessions. I kinda miss those. (Edit: Wait, did I just say that I miss being in stage 7b? HELL NO!)

But, I wonder how long until this gets better. Anyone else have this experience?

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MFA,

You quit Ambien right around the same time as adderall, right? I'd be willing to bet your body is dealing with withdrawal from that as well. Good for you for kicking both right away. I'm not looking forward to withdrawals from klonopin, after my doctor and I discuss tapering, because insomnia is a definite side effect.

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Good point, Ashley. I quit ambien about 2 months after adderall. I am still adjusting I think. I find it really hard to get to sleep at night, and then usually wake up about 3 or 4 am for 30 mins or so before going back to sleep again. Sometimes I am just awake but exhausted and agitated from 3am till sunrise, and then I will drop back to sleep about 15 mins before I'm supposed to get up.

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  • 11 months later...

WOW! This is such an eye-opener! Thank you for posting this. I was definitely in Stage 7a/b before. I was in stage 7A I believe, right before I chose to quit for good. I'm only 9 days clean so far and it's been hard but stuff like this is great motativation to never want to go back... I can relate to the "being so angry at the world and blaming all the people around you for feeling like this...feeling like shit" part so much. I was stuck in that state of mind for like the last 6 months to a year of my life and didn't know why. But I knew why the entire time. Too scared to stop, too scared to get fat and lazy and lack of motivation but enough is enough already. I pick no more stuffering. I want to love and life again.

 

My OCD negative thoughts, anixiety, and depression were getting so bad, my doc put me on zoloft and I've never been depressed before in my life nor is it in my family history. I honestly blame myself and the adderall for it. Hopefully I can get off the zoloft soon too.

 

Thanks again!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Great post!

I made it thru all the stages and into the last one (8)- thankfully that all ended 12 months ago. I am still physically, spiritually and mentally recovering.

I was taken back by the information on "word salad", this was the exact term I used when trying to tell others that something was definitely wrong inside my head. I had learned that term in a psychology class but did not know it was related to schizophrenia, I had been told it was due to brain injury. Scares me looking back at that time and piecing together info now about what was really happening to me.

Thanks for posting this, it is very informative.

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  • 3 weeks later...

wow! im transitioning between stage 2-3. I would never think this pill can cause this much trouble for people or me if i dont stop! I dont notice a difference with my life with the pill so far but i guess im not that deep in the process i have been taking 15mg a day where i split a 30mg in half and even though i take more now i still have to split the pill,ew paranoia. This has been the most helpful post out there thank you, reading about what you willingly and purposely did to your body,brain and life throughout years kind of makes me never ever want to reach stage 3. The most thing thats puzzling me is the fact that everyone here is incredibly superrrr smart how can a pill take this much control??!! 

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wow! im transitioning between stage 2-3. I would never think this pill can cause this much trouble for people or me if i dont stop! I dont notice a difference with my life with the pill so far but i guess im not that deep in the process i have been taking 15mg a day where i split a 30mg in half and even though i take more now i still have to split the pill,ew paranoia. This has been the most helpful post out there thank you, reading about what you willingly and purposely did to your body,brain and life throughout years kind of makes me never ever want to reach stage 3. The most thing thats puzzling me is the fact that everyone here is incredibly superrrr smart how can a pill take this much control??!!

addiction hijacks your brain so that the reward response of taking the drug overrides logic. It has nothing to do with your intelligence level. Anyone can become an addict given the right circumstances. It's a natural instinct to seek pleasure and avoid pain.
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