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SweetCarolinee

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Posts posted by SweetCarolinee

  2. DAY 4 OFF ADDERALL

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    ForMyDaughter,

    I agree with what everyone else has said on here to you! And hell yeah to the cutting off your supply, that is a huge step towards quitting, great job :) And CONGRATS being 8 days clean, that is huge... keep going!! :) We are rooting you on.

    The depression is normal as well. So keep telling yourself this is a normal step/part of recovery. I went on Zoloft in Oct. 2 months before I quit and stayed on it up until around a month ago, it worked wonders but I believe it also made me more tired than I already was and it also made me gain weight. Of course, everyone is going to gain weight after stopping the use of a stimulate but I was craving crazy foods, I never ate or wanted before (like white bread) and I believe it was from the Zoloft. I've heard great things about Wellbutrin.

    Because of the anxiety, I have been taking I tyrosine supplements but only when needed (so not everyday) and only at night but you may be able to take them during the day, I'm not sure. They make you very relaxed but not too sleepy.

    I didn't do much during my first few weeks of quitting, besides sleeping, resting, relaxing, watching lots of movies, spending a lot of time on this site and then started yoga. Take it easy, be easy on yourself. Don't beat yourself up or be too hard on yourself. You are healing. This is a big deal. Your doing something amazing. I honestly think quitting Adderall was one of the best decisions I've ever made in my LIFE. I couldn't be happier right now. Of course, I still have my down days but who doesn't, that's apart of life. Overall, my depression and anxiety is way less than it was on Adderall or ADHD meds. I will be 5 months clean in 8 days! If I can do it, you can! Just take it one step at a time, one day at a time.

    Coffee has been helping a lot now with waking up and energy - I'm not a morning person lol And also running, exercising and trying to eat as healthy as possible helps… I also try to drink at least 72oz of water a day.

    You can also look into b12 supplements or shots for energy!

    • Like 1

  3. 12 Miles a Week Runners Club - NEW

    in Lounge (off-topic stuff)

    Posted

    Occasional - that is so awesome, thanks for that tip and YAY on the yoga! I'm gonna make myself that same goal, to start going back to hot yoga and I got myself a Groupon for unlimited classes for a month that expires at the end of summer so I feel like I have to go soon or I waste money haha

    Cat - that is AWESOME, congratulations… that is AMAZING time. Damn!!! You are such an inspiration, just reading your post, makes me want to go running and start trainning for a half marathon haha I'm so proud of everyone!

    • Like 3

  6. 12 Miles a Week Runners Club - NEW

    in Lounge (off-topic stuff)

    Posted

    Hey guys,

    Mostly everyone did great this week and if you didn't get any miles in, no worries there is always this week! :) I'm proud of all of you!

    This week:

    Tuesday: 4.06 miles (intervals)
    Friday: hiked 5.20 miles
    Saturday: 5.59 miles (intervals)

    So I did that 7 day free trail at that gym 2 weeks ago but ended up deciding not to join right now. It was kinda expensive and since my boss is away for 2 weeks, I have to pick up all her events and mine so I figured I would be too busy to run but that turned out not to be true! So, now I have one of those water bottle backpacks and I've been running outside in the 86 weather but I figure the sunshine and good ol' vitamin D is good for me.

    My new favorite thing to do running is intervals. I sprint my hardest .10 miles (1/10th) then power walk the next .10 miles and then I do this, back and forth for 4 miles or more. It's so fun and like a game and/or contest. It makes it not boring. Plus if I'm sprinting and trying to convince myself to give up, I talk myself out of it during the .10 power walk. Also during the .10 power walk, my heart rate goes down and I try to not overheat myself during it. I recently read intervals is very good way to burn fat so I'm all about it lol

    And yesterday I went four wheelin' and it was a woot!

    • Like 4

  9. DAY 4 OFF ADDERALL

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    ForMyDaughter,

    That is so awesome and strong of you to toss out your prescription, good for you and we're proud of you! And on Mothers Day, that is amazing and very sentimental and you will always look back and remember this date as the day you decided to get healthy and get control of your life again. Your making the right first steps to become clean and starting your healing/recovery process. The first few weeks are hard as hell. I don't even remember them, I think I slept for most of it. Definitely tell your family/loved ones what you are doing so they understand, support and are there for you to help you out with anything during this tough time. Also, you tossed out your current prescription but you should cut ties with your doctor and/drug dealer so you can't get your hands on any more in the future.

    I felt very sick and flu like the first few weeks after quitting, I believe they can possibly be some Adderall withdrawal systems. And it's normal. It sucks and is very uncomfortable but normal. You were on a very high amount though and I do agree with Justin, about possibly getting some professional help to make this as comfortable as possible and this quit permanent. I got those same systems just by not taking it for a day (like I was hungover or something), before my quit.

    About 3 weeks or so, after quitting, I started hot yoga and it helped so much. I know it sounds crazy and like a lot of work but it felt amazing and sweating it all out really helped and been great. I think it has helped a lot in my recovery. I gained a lot from it and since I have moved to FL (the beginning of April) I haven't done any hot yoga and I'm really missing it. I just got a Groupon and going to start going again within the next few days. Hope this helps! And I hope you start feeling better :)
     

    • Like 2

  14. If I take Phentermine, does that mean I relapse?

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Thank you again everyone for all your help and support. I haven't touched it since and don't plan too. I have come too far and fought too hard to go back down the rabbit hole. I went back to the doctors today and got another B-12 shot and some herbal supplements instead. I also hiked on this wildlife park on an island for 5 miles in the beautiful sunshine. My anxiety is up a little tonight and I'm not sure why and I hope this will pass soon. We'll see how it goes!!!

    • Like 3
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    • Popular Post

    If I take Phentermine, does that mean I relapse?

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Yeah, I'm pretty pissed too but at the end of the day it's my own fault and I gotta take accountability.

    But, the good news is I made a decision and I'm not taking anymore of the Phentermine. Hopefully, this was just a minor roadblock, detour and setback and I can continue on my journey of health, recovery and healing.

    Thank you all for your advice, it helped a lot and you all were just restating what I already knew in my head and heart.

    Today I have to do 2 paintings and an event tonight but tomorrow I'm going back to the place and bringing the Phentermine and giving them back because I don't want or need them. It really did remind me of Adderall too much and made my heart hurt. Also, it made me not eat and feel weird and not in a good way. It also reminded me of Adderall in the fact, all I wanted to do was drink on it and that is so unhealthy and not me anymore or the person I want to be or become. I will see if they have something all natural or herbal instead.

    Last night, before bed I couldn't fall asleep and I checked my e-mail and I read an e-mail from "TUT…A Note from the Universe" and it said:

    "The long and short of it goes something like this…

    When one stops looking for the quick and easy way, Caroline, and just deals with what's already on their plate, the quick and easy way soon finds them."

    I couldn't believe it, I related so much to this saying and I'm taking this as a sign!

    I also haven't given 100% to lose any of the weight I've gained, I've tried a little so time for me to put more effort into it. It's been a little harder lately because I've been so busy with the new job, which I love by the way and is so much fun, I haven't gotten to work out as much as I wanted and it's definitely put a damper on my mood. I need to make it a priority to try to work out as much as possible because that just helps with overall well-being and awesomeness. Haha the first time I reread this, I wrote "make out" instead of work out… more making out and working out, foo sure!
     

    Thanks everyone again, you all are the shit :)

    • Like 5

  19. If I take Phentermine, does that mean I relapse?

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Hey guys,

    Thank you so much for your answers, it means a lot to me and I agree with ALL of you. I knew not to take this shit the whole time but was just being an idiot. Sadly to say, I did take it Saturday… I knew in my heart not too but it was an act of desperation and that fact I had access to something that will make me lose weight without even trying and fast but surely not the answer or true way to keep the weight off.

    It's pretty ironic because up until I moved to FL, at the beginning of April, I still had my 3-month supply of 50mg of Vyvanse and never once touched it, looked at it or wanted to take it and I never did. Right before I left for FL, I gave the pills to my mom (who I know would never take them and would know what to do with them). But as soon as I got my hands on some appetite suppressant I went ape shit.

    Saturday, I didn't eat anything and went to a house party, partied my ass off and drank way too much. Sunday, yesterday, I was super hungover and threw up 10 times, couldn't eat anything until 6pm and had to work last night but I got my shit together and taught an awesome Mother's Day Paint Nite class. My heart still hurts a little. I'm still trying to figure out what to do, I haven't taken it today nor do I want too. But if I have them I'm more likely to take them. I may call the doctor and bring them back or see if they have a herbal one instead. Thank you guys again, I feel so ashamed. Unfortunately, I've always known the only thing that would ever make me want to do a stimulate again is weight loss related.

    When my new health insurance kicks in, in a few weeks and I'm still struggling maybe I will explore Wellbutrin.

     

    And thanks for the articles, I didn't get time to read them yet, I have to go meet up with my boss in 15minutes but when I get back I plan on reading them.

    • Like 2

  21. If I take Phentermine, does that mean I relapse?

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    Hey guys,

    Hope all is well and everyone is having a great weekend so far.

    I have to admit something to all of you because I want to keep it 100% and I want to be as honest as possible.

    This morning I went to the wellness doctor/appointment my boyfriend got me for my birthday, which I asked for and wanted. It went well but I have to say, I have gained 20-very-unwanted-and-noticeable-lbs in the last 4 months and I am not happy about it and it's been driving me crazy (because I have been working out and eating kinda healthy). I guess not hard enough. I think it was the combo of quitting Adderall and being just on Zoloft and Birthcontrol, 2 medications known to make women gain weight -- me esp. The Zoloft made me crave crazy foods that I have never eaten and I wasn't even raised eating like white crabs and cookies and I would eat a full-balanced meal and still be hungry right after and it was very unnormal for me. But what is normal these days? And I don't want to make any excuses.

    They put me on some crazy ass 800cals a day diet. Um what? And gave me a B12 shot in my ass. They also gave me a daily multi-vitiums, stronger B12 pills (because I can't come in for the shots the next 2 weeks; my boss is going out of town and I have to do all her events including mine) and an appetite suppressant called Phentermine.

    Phentermine is a "…short-term (you can only take it a few weeks) adjunct in a regimen of weight reduction based on exercise, behavioral modification and caloric restriction…" and is a stimulate… I believe a Stage 4 and Adderall is a Stage 2. Way milder than Adderall but if I take it does this mean I relapse? And all that I have worked so hard for, will it all be gone and for nothing?

    I have a 2 week supply, they just gave me it at the appointment with all the other supplements and I told them my history with Adderall. They said it's fine.

    Part of me feels guilty as hell and I don't want to let you guys down or myself but another part of me just wants to take it for 2 weeks to get a jump start on my weightloss and help speed up my metabolism again. I don't know what to do.

     

    If I knew the "appetite suppressant" was going to be a stimulate, I probably wouldn't have gone. Maybe I was just being naive because I am so desperate to lose the weight I put on. For my job, I am in front of or on a small stage of a large group of people, anywhere between 15-60 people (teaching them to paint) and I don't want to think people are staring at me and judging me. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin again. Maybe I need to go talk to someone? But my new health insurance starts the beginning of June.

    Words of advice, anyone who is in or has been in a similar situation or suggestions, please help and let me know. I just don't know what to do anymore.

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