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Almost 2 months clean and STRUGGLING


back2life

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I don't know what's going on. I was doing so well before, getting stronger, more confident, more energetic, ............ AND THEN, out of nowhere, I began to get those intense cravings, INTENSE!!!

I know its still very early in my recovery but I am just very insecure now about how and IF I will ever get past it.

Has anyone ever experienced something like this at about 2 months off this drug?

 

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LOL, anyone?  How about EVERYONE!  You are experiencing recovery from Adderall.  It SUCKS, but it does get better.  It will not get better if you get back on the drug, though.  You are doing so great!  Just hold steady and stay the course.  Have a nap and a snack!  Don't worry about weight at this time.  Have some comfort foods.  I ate soooo much icecream when I was at the 2 month point (damn bluebell and their bacterial contamination!).  Chips and salsa, cookies and milk...yummy.  Netflix, snacks, and time.  That is the best medicine. 

 

This too shall pass.  It won't be the last time, but the cravings become fewer and farther between.  You can do this. 

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I had cravings for Adderall for months after quitting, especially when I would be in situations I know the pills would help me because I felt so foggy at the time. I'd give it around 6mths to no longer crave, but everyone is different. I feel like you just have to reoccupy your mind and make sure all sources of getting the drug again are cut off. I think its also good to have a close friend or relative you can talk to when you feel like this, so they can remind you why its not a good idea to start again.

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THANK YOU GUYS,

I MEAN REALLY THANK YOU! Yours comments are so inspiring.

I don't really have anyone whom I could talk to. Its only this site for me, for now....

I hope at some point it will change.

I am not caving, part of the reason is I told my psychiatrist that I was moving to another state, I have no other way of getting it otherwise.

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there is something about the 60 day mark which was bitter sweet for me.  after that the bitterness fades and the sweetness becomes fuller and richer!  You are doing SO AWESOME you will see the other side of the hill soon, i promise!

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Still early days. Congrats. Your brain is recalibrating to life without adderall. This is perhaps the most difficult and hardest thing to describe.   This is a good time to start exercising regularly. Any activity is good for the mindgrapes and depression. I know you won't feel like it initially but  try to do something, anything really.  Sleeping is normal at this stage. 

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I think the worst part about approaching the 2 month mark is that you have the worst of both worlds.

 

1) the lethargy from it still being fairly recent that you quit

 

2) you start to put more expectations on yourself because you're frustrated with not wanting or being able to do anything

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I've probably already said this before in different words but the thought just hit me.

 

I still have cravings often, but the power dynamic between me vs them shifted at some point during the 3rd month.

 

I now feel much stronger, and I dont have the anxiety, or impending feeling of doom - like I used to feel like deep down it was just a matter of time before I caved.  At some point between day 60 and 90 I started feeling stronger than my cravings were.  Keep at it and you should expect this too!

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I am just over a month and I feel your pain! I'm so glad I came on this site bc I've felt like my willpower has been dwindling- I am searching for a job and have had a few interviews and I am just feeling like its the worst time ever to have quit!

Anyway, all these positive posts are giving me hope and making me realize I can get through this! And you can too!

Thank you all for being so encouraging and making me feel a little more optimistic.

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I've tried quitting every months for the past 6 months. I only made it to 7-10 days at most and them ran back to my doctor to yet ask for another script.

I always thought I would be stronger and do better and be in a better place next month............but it never happened. I guess the longer I waited the harder it became to finally quit for good.

 

Beautiful Disaster,

I hope we will make it this time, we are stronger than the pill.

Love

XOXO

Keep in touch

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June 5th will be my "1 year".  I am feeling great!  It is hard to get past the cravings in the beginning.  The sense that it will be better if you could just get your Adderall back.  Maybe it has been long enough that it will work the way it used to.  Ha!  Lies...all lies.  I am so grateful to the people on this site for being a sounding board and a source of inspiration.  They helped to keep me from going back to the doctor.  If you feel weak, read the articles and posts.  You can do this.  Don't give in and you will see...

 

I am proud of all of the newbies!  It is so hard in the beginning.  Love to you all!

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