Possible Adderall outcomes in the ADD brain versus non-ADD brain?

[#Less]

    I have joined this community because of its high quality content, straight-shot format and tone.  I understand the mission of this website and have read and understood the terms and disclaimer of,

 

“Adderall is appropriate for some people. This website is not for everybody…If you are deeply debilitated by severe ADD, you should ignore this entire website.†-Mike

 

     With that said, I am a not here because I am trying to quit, but because I am of those mentioned in the disclaimer category of "If you are deeply debilitated by severe ADD"  However, I am still here to ask for your help because I am new to Adderall after having learned (last month) why I have been so dysfunctional my whole life (mid-40s).  I feel relieved, my family is relieved, and am thankful for the meds at this time.

 

     However, now that I have performed my shot-gun wedding with Adderall, I can clearly see that there can be potentially serious consequences for accepting Adderall’s friendly and firm handshake.

 

Down to business

     The intense testimonials here describing the depths of Adderall addiction, (from its Siren’s Song Honeymoon phase, to its chronic/grinding, life-force draining attributes) are unsettling; moreover, the accounts of amphetamine induced psychosis continuing for some, even after cessation, are nightmarish. 

 

     However, what I am not seeing in any of the articles, stories, or comments (that I could find) is, what ever happened to the actual hardcore ADD after users have concluded that Adderall is ruining their life despite its helpfulness with the intense ADD?

The fundamental quandary is, I cannot tell what % of the Adderallics testimonials are:

 

1) People like me that are suffering greatly from ADD, but after a long period of being thankful for the medication, are now wondering if they unknowingly jumped from the frying pan into the fire by accepting Adderall’s help.

 

2) People that never needed it, but secured a steady supply via prescription (or other), and were subsequently enslaved.

 

     This distinction means a lot to me, because I am trying to determine (as a user) if Adderall’s apparent hostile effects on the brain and mind are the same for the biological mechanics of the ADD brain, versus those who do not have an ADD brain, but instead needed/wanted Adderall for other reasons.

 

     I could not find a single relevant peer-reviewed article on Google Scholar pertaining to my question, using search variations of:  results of mixed amphetamine salts efficacy with ADHD brain versus healthy brain? Or, does the ADHD brain have the same level of addiction potential, and probability of outcomes such as amphetamine induced psychosis as the healthy brain taking the same stimulant?

 

     Asked plainly, are there many examples of ADD sufferers (who really dislike the idea of going back to the world of ADD) yet are nevertheless running out of the burning Adderall building yelling, “This is even worse than the ADHD ever was! Get me the HELL OUT OF HERE!â€

 

     For those members who were not ADD, but embraced, and became addicted to Adderall for your own reasons, and are now suffering and trying to quit; my heart sincerely admires you, and I am so sorry that you are suffering, and wish you the very best during your recovery process.

 

Thank you members for allowing me ask my question in your forums.

 

[Doge]

I myself am in the non-ADD category.  My attraction to the drug was born out of desperation for help during a seemingly impossible situation.  It got me during that time (when in fact perhaps withdrawing from my academic program would have been by far the better choice) but then my use continued and evolved into a full blown addiction due to greed and ambition - so I'm not sure if my experience would be helpful at all. 

 

Maybe some other users can offer better answers.

[Zerokewl]

ADD or ADHD is a difference in cognitive ability not a disorder. I have ADHD became addicted and abused the pills. I felt it was helping at 1st, but later needed more and more of it to feel normal. Other stimulant based meds did not have the same effect on me.  

 

[Cassie]

Addiction doesn't discriminate. Anyone can become addicted to an addictive drug given the right circumstances. Look at meth - also speed, also prescribed for adhd as Desoxyn. Lots of addicts, some who had underlying problems, some who did drugs out of boredom or peer pressure. There are many reasons people become addicted to speed. There's no studies because 1) adhd is diagnosed through questionnaires. There's no biological markers being analyzed and 2) it would be unethical to give people with no problems an addictive, mood altering drug just to see what happens.

This site is a mix of people who have add vs people who were seeking a performance enhancer. Both categories struggle to get off the drug once addicted.

[AlwaysAwesome]

I am a ADHD sufferer (?) and I managed to live my whole life being a jack of all trades and master of none.  This was because I didn't stick around long enough to get really good at anything.  I started taking Adderall when I was 32 years old.  WOW!  It was great...at first.  I never took more than my prescribed dose, and I quit because it stopped working and I didn't want to increase the dose.  I was experiencing all of the side effects, the same as the hardest binge addict.  It doesn't matter...I am an Adderall addict.  I always will be, but I will never let it back into my life. 

 

Next month I will be clean 1 year.  The ADHD is back, but I don't resent it.  It is part of who I am and I am glad to have me back.  I am back to being a jack of all trades and not a very organized person.  My house is cleaned sporadically, not in a constant feverish scrubbing...  My kids are happier, my husband is happier, my body is healthier.  I preach against Adderall use to anyone I can.  Don't think it won't happen to you!  It is the drug, not the person.  Our stories are all so similar, because the one common variable is the drug. 

 

Good luck and I hope that this helps.  There are non stimulant medications if you feel like you need something, but I am finding that the ADHD is like an old friend. 

[LILTEX41]

Yes, I have ADD.  At first ADD drugs were the most magical thing on earth. They solved all my problems.  I went on and on about how insanely wonderful they were and I felt like I could conquer the world.

 

Then as time went on, I couldn't imagine my life without them.  When I switched from concerta to adderall things deteriorated quickly.  Life was amazing as long as I had my pills.  When I ran out early, I would fall asleep at my desk at work or spend entire weekends comatose. 

 

Anyhow, the point is yes, I have ADD.  The pills worked in the beginning, but as I became more and more addicted they took over my life and made me into a crazy person.  

 

I am now the same person I was before I took adderall.  I am no longer super woman.  I am normal, I work hard, and I get by and I've done really well without it.  I started my career on ADD drugs. I was scared to death when I stopped my career would fall apart. It didn't.  I actually got one hell of a promotion without it.  And all the time I was on it, I think it just made me people scared of me.  I was very stressed out, super intense, hostile at times, overly energetic, and emotionally all over the place.  When I quit, i became a normal human being again and to my surprise I was better off.  I know this is probably not what you want to hear right now, but that's my experience anyhow.

 

I will say I do have a friend who is a recovering crack addict. He's been sober for over 15 years.  He takes ritalin. He has a prescription.  He says sometimes he forgets to take it.  I don't know how that works being that he was addicted to crack, but yet not ritalin.  Ritalin is no adderall, but still a stimulant and it's addictive.  I think everyone is different though.  Maybe you can take it and be fine.  Nobody can answer this riddle for you unfortunately.  What I can tell you is that I've experimented with a lot of things.  This was by far the most addictive drug I've ever tried though.  It's a sneaky one because you are given a prescription, they are cheap, and it's actually approved for usage.   Plus, it makes you productive so you can rationalize how great it is to get high all the time.  I guess it's good to know all of this going into it.  If you start to feel concerned you can just stop and be done.  If it were me though, I'd throw the pills away right now and not risk it.  Once you're hooked, it's really hard to walk away from it.

 

Keep us posted!

[AlwaysAwesome]

Run away, as fast as you can!  That is my advice...for what it is worth.

[#Less]

Thank you for all of the replies.

 

     These forums are the first topic specific forums that I have entered since I was prescribed my Adderall 40 days ago. My first stops were at ADHD forums, however, I never signed up to post.

The esprit de corps over at the ADD/ADHD forums I visited were a little bit too much like pep-rally, “hey, we are kind of like comic book heroes, in that we each have our own unique super-powers of accelerated creativity and observation! Go Team ADHD!† T-shirts are for sale that have ADHD written in AC/DC font, complete with lightning bolt between the D and the H. Meanwhile, YouTube is full of wacky-zany videos trying to explain (apparently for the benefit of others), how creative, intuitive, spontaneous, and yes, a bit scattered, preoccupied, and unfocused they/we all are! I could not relate to most of it. They felt almost self congratulatory or ego stroking. I don’t know. But at this stage, I found it all rather annoying.

 

     Are you familiar with the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator, you know, the whole “I am an ENTP personality type!â€, of course you are, it’s been institutionalized.  Well, the vibe of the ADHD forums I lurked in for a few days had much of the same flavor as the dedicated forums for specific personality types, “How ya’ll doing out there my ENFP peeps!â€â€¦yeah…no thanks.

 

      There wasn’t much there for me.  My adult ADHD mutated into blinding relentless rage and misanthropic—damn near agoraphobic—tendencies; further exacerbated by combative, confrontational, dog-chasing-its-own-tail, negative feedback-loop thinking.   Not the quirky, fun loving, life-of-the-party, absent minded professor ADHD. There must be some kind of public relations campaign problem or something, because the “life-of-the-party, hyper-expressive, can’t concentrate because I’m just so gosh darn eclectic and eccentric†model that is being presented to the general public [apparently] in order to help them understand the diagnosis, is only highlighting that style…not the road-rage flavored ADHD, less sexy I guess.

 

Earth feels like Pink Floyd – The Wall …not Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.

 

     Why am I here at your forums? Because I understand self-medicating, and addiction, and doing things to cope; and if I really want to know what I may be up against when trading my current problems for Adderall problems, then this is the door I wanted to knock on first. I don’t have time to screw around and play paddy-cake over at the ADHD pep rally; maybe I was at the wrong ADHD forums. Plus I had a hypothesis that I wanted some validation on confirming my notion that ADHD is a meat-and-taters biological brain-wiring thing, and not only a perception or personality type, and therefore Adderall (although dangerous for all) did different things with the ADD brain, such as being less susceptible to amphetamine psychosis, etc…

 

      Not gonna get that advise over at the ADHD forums, they embrace the meds, they talk about the Adderall lifestyle like it’s some kind of Martha Stewart talk show, “you know…when I am coming down off of my last 20mg XR for the day, I always find that a little slice of pumpkin pie with some chamomile tea, really helps me unwind and reflect.†I know I am being a bit hyperbolic, but you can’t bust up the vibe over there and start making threads about amphetamine induced psychosis.  You make a thread over there titled, “Hi, I’m new. How many of you started hearing voices after a while?†and it will be as if you farted in the room.

 

     I have only been on Adderall (50-60mg/day) for 40 days, but I can already see some weird shit happening. Yes, of course it is helping me immensely now because I am fresh-meat  and the new-me is making my family want to pick me up and crowd-surf on their raised hands; however,  I decided to de-tox myself for a day and was amazed how utterly worthless I was. I thought without it I would just be my usual old cranky self, like before the pills; instead all I wanted to do was stare and drool. I did not want to do anything!…no grocery store, no chores…nothing. I couldn’t take it. I lasted until about 2pm and was like, “ok, this is weird, but I I will investigate this phenomena later, right now I have to get something done.† Down the hatch! 20 minutes later. “Well now! Hi Honey, give me that grocery list…I’m on it!† Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

[LILTEX41]

 

 

I know I am being a bit hyperbolic, but you can’t bust up the vibe over there and start making threads about amphetamine induced psychosis.  You make a thread over there titled, “Hi, I’m new. How many of you started hearing voices after a while?” and it will be as if you farted in the room.

 

Omg, you are hilarious and a phenomenal writer.  This is so true.  I was with new friends one time who had just started taking the pills and when I told them about my experience he stopped the car and told me I could get out.  He did NOT want to hear ANYTHING negative about this drug.  Now, this was a very shady character and luckily we not friends today as he is crazy, but that's how powerful this drug is...people go NUTS over it in the beginning.  I am glad you are doing your research on it early enough to know what you're getting into ahead of time.

 

Anyhow, I'm enjoying your posts.  Made me LOL.  Good luck!

[AlwaysAwesome]

OH, yes!  You are seeing the problem and the reason it is so addictive.  If you could quit and just be your old self instantly, then there would be no draw to go back to it.  It changes you.  Immediately.  It takes a good deal of time to get back to the old you, and trust me you will miss the "old you" eventually.  That amazing feeling doesn't last forever.  I love your posts and I can completely relate to the ADHD cheerleaders being annoying.  Try listening to people talk about medicating their children and not be pissed off.  I can't do it anymore. 

[survived]

I believe I have ADD. I don't think I really believe that Adderall works differently with an ADD (vs) a Non-ADD type brain. From the stories I have read, I think Adderall seems to equally boost both types of people and negatively affect us just the same. Just my thoughts.

[survived]

Thank you for all of the replies.

 

     These forums are the first topic specific forums that I have entered since I was prescribed my Adderall 40 days ago. My first stops were at ADHD forums, however, I never signed up to post.

The esprit de corps over at the ADD/ADHD forums I visited were a little bit too much like pep-rally, “hey, we are kind of like comic book heroes, in that we each have our own unique super-powers of accelerated creativity and observation! Go Tet relate to most of it. They felt almost self congratulatory or ego stroking. I don’t know. But at this stage, I found it all rat

This reminds me of the ADD forums I used to visit years ago! It's like you couldn't say anything negative about the drug, and if you did prepare people to defend the Adderall in every way possible. It was like Adderall could do no wrong! I think I started picking up on that and started treating it the same. I don't know what it is about this drug that can make you feel like you want to protect it. It's crazy.