dolssa

non adderall users will never understand

4 posts in this topic

I recently made a post about my recent relapse after almost a year clean. My mom noticed that i had more energy when i took the adderall and doesnt understand why i dont just keep taking it. I tried to explain that its an addiction and the good doesnt last and ill pay for it later. a few weeks ago i went home to visit her (i was still clean then) and I thought wow i feel good compared to a year ago when i first quit. we went shopping, i participated in family games, i didnt have alot of anxiety at dinners and a year ago this weekend would have been unimaginable without adderall. i just got off the phone with her and she made a comment like "you are better than when you came to visit" it broke me. non adderall users will never understand getting through the days without it. because compared to other drugs it can look normal. she also said "its been a year" theres no way you are still feeling the affects of when you took adderall. i just wish she understood that YES. im STILL dealing with the affects of my addiction of 5 years, even having taken the correct dosage. its so hard. really no one but adderall users will understand. its such a misunderstood addiction. :/ 

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19 hours ago, dolssa said:

a few weeks ago i went home to visit her (i was still clean then) and I thought wow i feel good compared to a year ago when i first quit. we went shopping, i participated in family games, i didnt have alot of anxiety at dinners and a year ago this weekend would have been unimaginable without adderall. i just got off the phone with her and she made a comment like "you are better than when you came to visit" it broke me.

this all sounds like TREMENDOUS improvement!! I'm so sorry that your mother's comment robbed you of that accomplishment, but I think you've rightly recognized that it's not really her fault. our addiction is definitely unique, and the long term effects are seriously misunderstood. Pharm companies and doctors do a very good job of marketing Adderall as a "medication", but we all know it's just pharmaceutical speed. If you were addicted to "drugs", I'm sure your mother would never encourage continued use!

hang in there - things are going to get A LOT better this year (:

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