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1. Independence 2. Enjoy 3. Family 4. Home 5. Assurance 15. Power 14. Prestige 13. Loyalty 12. Leadership 11. Mastery 6. Friendship 7. Achievement 8. Wealth 9. Challenge and Self Development 10. Serve

Being a teacher is a job that definitely requires you to be "on" more than a lot of other jobs. I'm not a teacher but was in a similar situation at work, being the one that would always say yes to new projects and solving problems. Here are a few lessons I've learned (a month into quitting). When your emotions level off, it gets easier to speak truthfully and acknowledge your limitations. You can say, "Honestly, I don't think I have the capacity to take on this extra project right now." If you're always the one taking on extra stuff, hopefully they will cut you some slack. You will also feel less guilt and anxiety about saying no. My anxiety was through the ROOF on adderall. Anytime an extra task was added to my plate, I'd feel the pain of intense anxiety in my chest knowing how much I'd already committed to but hear myself saying, of course I can do that. I was jealous of people who had the ability to say no. Off adderall, my emotions have leveled off and I find myself able to reasonably assess my workload and turn down projects without feeling guilty about it. The worst part only lasts a week. You'll feel completely helpless for a week, but after that your confidence will return and you will be able to start taking on a little more. You can do it.

The harsh reality is there's no good time to quit. When you're not taking 18 credits, you have a summer job. And then you're working full time and can't afford to take time off otherwise you can't pay the bills. And maybe then you have kids, and you can't just take a break from kids. Unless you go to rehab, you will have to keep some of your commitments and obligations while quitting. Read through the stories here and you'll be inspired by what others have managed to do. Quitting while attending school or working full time, balancing family and kids, and more. It can be done. If you decide to do it, this site will be here to support you.

That's awesome! It has been years since I pulled an all nighter without Adderall, I'd be terrified too. And very proud after pulling it off. It's funny how on Adderall, procrastination was like the default way of doing things. I would purposefully put big projects off until I had a whole night or weekend day to work on it. Why work on something in incremental steps when you can do it all in one epic binge?! Relearning how to take it step by step now.

Agree with MFA that schmoozing/networking/interviewing is so much easier and more natural off Adderall, so you've got that going for you! I kind of cringe to think about the series of interviews I did a couple months ago when I was frequently taking two 50 mg of Vyvanse a day. Awkward city. Thank goodness I still managed to convince my current job to hire me.

Getting up and going running is probably a good idea. It helps just have some kind of routine or ritual that gets you going in the morning, whether it's running or coffee or vitamins. Plus you said last time it took 3 months and now you're just a few weeks in, so stick with it!

So great to see this on the front page today. I hope the story spurs more media coverage about the less extreme but increasingly common cases of Adderall abuse and addiction. I just can't believe doctors (who are supposed to be smart, right?) accept this circular logic of Dr. Katz at the end, that it's an innocuous medication that will work on people with ADHD and those who don't have ADHD won't feel it working, so they won't take it. It's a stimulant. It works similarly on all people and it can be abused.

This is so true for me too. Cheers to a new day.

K I'm back with my own non-work to-do list for the day. Hold me accountable. 1. Clean and vacuum upstairs room. 2. Go on a walk 3. Tweet three professionally relevant things (pertinent not to current job, but to hopefully future job) 4. Recalculate monthly personal budget based on new salary Been putting that fourth one off for a month now...

Dude, that's an ambitous to-do list! It would take me like three days to accomplish all those things. I totally believe you could do it all, cause you seem like a badass. My one tip is for tasks with undefined endpoints, like "research US citizenship process and begin studying for exam" I find it helpful to set time-based goals and break tasks into small pieces. Like: - Spend 30 minutes (or one hour) researching citizenship process and studying for exam - Purchase books needed to study for professional certification exam You can totally check those things off at the end of the day. A sauna sounds like a great reward for accomplishing all that!

Occasional01, we're all in this shit together. Glad you didn't relapse.

Olivia, that was totally me. Needing adderall just to function even in situations that required no focus or creativity. It's funny how ridiculous it seems even looking back with just a few weeks or months of perspective. Have to celebrate a moment just now... I've been focused on my work this afternoon and actually enjoying it. Just looked up and couldn't believe it was already 5 pm and two hours had passed since I last checked the time! I can't believe my ability to focus is already starting to come back after 25 days. And best of all, no pounding headache, no grinding teeth, no clenching jaws. The difference is that whether my focus returns tomorrow is far from certain... with adderall every day was the same (flat) but now life deals me good days and bad ones. Bring it on.

Naps Cooking dinner and drinking a glass of wine Downton Abbey ! Doing the crossword Catching up on political news Buying something I want (new clothes, something for the house, or whatever) Ice cream Just plain free time free of anxiety from not having gotten shit done

Congrats on getting through Day 4, ld. Do you have a calendar where you can mark off each day? For some reason marking the days with a big red X feels really satisfying for me, especially on the shitty ones.

Yeah, talk about enabling abuse. Those last few months were the only time in the 4 years that I was abusing it regularly, knowing it would all soon come to an end.

Do it! I don't have anyone in my "real" life holding me accountable because no one knows I took adderall except my doc. This site has been super important as a motivator and way to hold myself accountable.

Hmm, I kinda want to try it. 5 hour energy makes me twitchy and unable to sit still, but does not help with focus. So I have stopped using it. How does it work on others?

Seriously, the doctors blow my mind. Here's a story. So the last time I saw my doc was 6 months ago. She had decided to cut back her practice and semi retire, seeing only patients who really needed to talk... which was not the case with me, I only saw her to get my script written. I completely understood and saw this as my opportunity to quit. She gave me 3 more months of scripts... and then she went and pulled out a big unmarked blank bottle full of pills. The prescription information had been sharpied out. She said "technically I'm not supposed to do this, but here's another three months worth of Vyvanse in case you have trouble finding another doctor." She meant well, but it's crazy. Do you think doctors take this stuff themselves? I seriously wonder if they really know what it does.

Thanks for starting this. I wanted to contribute to have a record of all the reasons, just in case I am ever dumb enough to think about doing it again. Health/physical reasons Racing heart and blood pressure Gum pain and tenderness. This was one of the worst side effects for me. I would do this suction thing in my mouth without realizing it, and it was so bad that my dentist said my gums were receding. Gross! Teeth grinding Hair thinning WEIRD health problems that I swear were related to adderall. I have always been super healthy overall, but I started coming down with weird shit. Like shingles. It is quite rare for someone in their 20s to get shingles, but I did and I swear it was from the stress of adderall. All of the physical side effects stopped immediately when I quit. Other reasons Lower sex drive Irritability and anxiety Drinking too much Mush brain, words didn't come easily, my writing suffered Couldn't sleep without a sleep med Fear of being addicted for the rest of my life

Heather67, no kidding. Planting window boxes at 11 pm in June, spending half of Saturday cleaning the house. Not wanting to go walk to the coffee shop with coworkers because I was too busy focusing. Like you, I could NEVER live in the moment on adderall. Even if I was having fun at a particular moment, I would also be busy worrying about what we'd be doing next, what we'd do tomorrow, stressing about stuff I hadn't accomplished yet, and zillion other things. MFA, good question. I'm counting on appreciating more moments as the time goes on. - Reading a book - Drinking a cup of tea - Laying in bed on a really cold morning and just enjoying the warmth of it. Before, I'd need to get up immediately and start being productive. - Riding in a train and just looking out the window and appreciating the sights, while listening to music, and reflecting on things. That type of experience was never possible on adderall. Thanks for the responses! If anyone else wants to talk about small things or feelings they appreciate more now that adderall is gone, add your list.

You are farther along than me so I don't have answers about when it gets better (although reading other posts, it seems like it takes anywhere from 3 to 6 months if you're lucky, or even a year). I think it's an important realization that adderall tricks you into thinking you'll get more done when really it's the opposite. On adderall I spent so many hours believing I was "working" but really it was cleaning, organizing, or getting hyperfocused on details. Focus does not equal work! To be honest, the time I spend slacking or procrastinating now is probably equal to the time I wasted being TOO focused on adderall. Congrats on staying off so long, can't wait to reach 85 days.

Occasional is right. Writing it down is so important! What you wrote here is so, so true. Totally resonates with my experience. "I thought I was taking you to help me be successful. But what the hell kind of success is that life? It’s the opposite of success, and it’s no way to live. By robbing my soul from me, my work, and the world, you made me LESS successful. Far less successful. By socially isolating me and stifling my soul, keeping you around was ruining my career and my life, and the scary thing is that I didn’t even know it. For some twisted reason I still believed in you. You would always beckon, whispering these sweet lies I wanted to believe. You told me that as long as I took a bunch of addies I would be able to write, would be able to finish it up."

It's been 23 days since my last adderall after nearly 4 years on it. So thankful for this site. You guys have helped me get through some hard days. My story is similar to a lot of yours... prescribed adderall when I was 23 after having made it through college with stellar grades and a bright future ahead. I knew I didn't have ADHD, just loved how adderall made me even better at everything and found a doc who was easily convinced. At first it was great, and then it wasn't. I would take my pill, feel a little bit of energy (an ever diminishing amount) and then feel numb and irritated for the rest of the day. Sure, I could focus, but in a drone-like, emotionless way. And on all the wrong things. Mostly I took what I was prescribed (40 mg Adderall a day for a while, then 50 mg Vyvanse) but occasionally I would double my dose. On Vyvanse that was a bad idea, it made me hyperfocused to the point where I would literally take two or three hours to write a blog post at work, just obsessed with perfecting every single word and sentence structure. Yet I still did it on days when I had a "big assignment" thinking I needed that extra focus. Seriously! My drinking became out of control. If I could start drinking at noon, I would. Otherwise I'd get off work and come home and drink a bottle of wine. Hangovers were masked with another pill the next morning. I was scared shitless of quitting. I thought I needed adderall to feel happy, even though I knew it was making me very unhappy. But I guess that's addiction. Every single morning, my brain would crave that dopamine surge and I knew exactly how to feed it. I do mourn the past four years of my life, but I mourn for myself, not for the loss of the pill. I feel sad that my mind was tricked into thinking adderall was the thing I needed to be happy. It hurts especially to think of the happiest times -- vacations, adventures, time with my family, friends, my sweet boyfriend. All those mornings I woke up in a beautiful location surrounded by people I loved, and popped a pill, felt a tiny bit of euphoria for a minute, and then didn't feel anything for the rest of the day. In a post from a while back, someone said "if you can't enjoy a sunset, feel love, or appreciate the small things in life without a pill -- something is wrong." That's what I'll try to remember when I'm discouraged and depressed. It might take me longer to complete tasks at work. My house won't be as clean as it was. I won't be superwoman anymore. But it's worth it for the small things and for love. It's going to be hard but SO worth it.

Like Ashley6 I have had countless Adderall dreams since quitting. They usually involve a situation in which Adderall is available or tempting, and I'm scared about not being strong enough to resist. I wouldn't call them nightmares but they're definitely unpleasant and it's a relief to wake up and realize it wasn't real.

Day 2 totally sucks. Day 3 might be just as bad. Foggy, exhausted, painful, slow hell. Just slack as much as possible. Call in sick or go home early (people will probably think you are legitimately fatigued/sick anyway) if possible. The first week is hell but the fog WILL lift. Just hold out and read this site. I read all of Mike's articles the first week and then re-read my favorite ones... They reminded me why I was doing this. Also reading these boards helped, just knowing that other people are struggling through the same thing. You can do it!