Calo

Yay!! That is some news I can use! Being sleepy sucks. I got the giggles today. It seems retarded but I was just stoked for that. Soooo moving isn't as much of a problem now for you? That ones pretty hard.

Also I responded after only reading the first page. I'm still a bit flaky, sry guys.

Forks over Knives was a brilliant doc. I just watched Food Matters and am now curious if it really is our governments wish to restrict the use of vitamins and healthy foods in favor of meds. I mean, even my doc didn't suggest Adderall being the culprit behind my laundry list of health issues. For Pete's sakes, my hair was falling out. Would it have been so hard to mention, get whatcha eating and drinking these days? Oh nothing? Except the vending machine at school every once in a while? Hmmmm you may want to stop that.

Idk what this is? What's it do exactly?

Ok, so I'm going to pick up some tyrosine tomorrow. Anyone know of a comprehensive site for vitamin dosages and interactions? I've been reading up and its sooooo confusing to keep track of, plus I got a vitamin container, like the monday thru Sunday things but the probiotic needs to stay in the fridge and I cannot for the life of me remember if I've taken it or not! I've always had that problem with meds( except adderall of course, aaaalllwaaays could tell when I took that!) any suggestions on how to remember?

I bookmarked the face wash and the CEDSA sounds fascinating. Any advice for those without health insurance? That screening sounds expensive. That's a big thing that got me interested in medicine.... I can't afford it. Kind of sad really that Adderall is one of the cheapest and most harmful medications to maintain a valid prescription for. I'm just hoping that quitting it and going whole food will right things because I'm effed otherwise. Also Mikey, got any suggestions for IC?

I'm alive. Still no meds. Idk why but for whatever reason I've been in the best freakin' mood all day today. (Not to be confused with energetic, still taking naps a lot)Didn't really want to get on here prior to that, too tired and depressed. I didn't want to discourage anyone from quitting, and I've been a rather unpleasant person. Buuuuut today I laughed, like a lot. And for no particular reason. Just feeling giddy and silly. Being on Adderall makes you forget how much fun being ADHD is. It's not like I got a whole lot accomplished towards the end anyhow, too much time spent making lists and plans and and plaaaanning for how I was going to do something. I know I'm still a long way from right, but getting just a little of my spark back feels epic. I had to buy new pants. That's unfortunate, but idk if I'm imagining it but my hair feels softer almost? Not breaking out nearly as bad either. I've modified my diet as well. Not sure if I should try the tyrosine. Been eating all kinds of fish and eggs and vegetables and healthy stuff. Maybe diet is the ticket?

I like that bit, we all end up being a lady someday honestly it was hard not to get depressed reading this initially, being dumpy and tired sucks. And I feel soo dumpy. But then I remember, I was already gaining weight back, the stunning girl was already gone regardless of staying on it. I guess that's the thing we ladies need to remember? The illusion is just that, an illusion. What's not an illusion is acne, dried out skin, hollow eyes, and a strung out personality, oh and garbage term papers, those happen too. 20 lbs or losing the rest of your hair? Worst part is that I had to think about it. Thank you for your story. I want to make it a year.

You probably won't be as snappy too? I give you kudos for teaching in general. It takes a special type of individual to tackle that spot. You'll be great. Tired for a little, but you'll feel better and they'll be better for having you fully present

You think the hair will come back? Oh, I flushed the pills finally. Its really bad cuz my main thought was damn, those were expensive. I looked at my perscription and was like hmm I wonder if I could,like, return these and get my money back? Like its a bottle of 1/2 used perfume or something. Yes, these are the conversations I have with myself these days. I swear I am not this dumb normally. That was the selling point for flushing them though, I can't afford to be this dim witted. Natural selection will end up getting me before adderall does.How do you start exercising? I'm not being funny either. I moved the recliner and coffee table to do the Kinect workout and then went back to lay down. I'm pretty sure that doesn't count. In serious news his wife got back so it's been set up, Chris' funeral is on Tuesday. I waffle back and forth between being really really sad and really really pissed at him. I wish he was here so I could yell at him for leaving, but I'm pretty sure he'd yell at me for this pickle I've gotten myself into. Thanks for the support. Its weird but it really does help. How'd I end up so reclusive that there is no one I have in my life I can talk to about this?

I'm sorry you went through that but it's kind of a relief almost to know none of it was "just me". I'm not the Lone Ranger to go full retard while taking something that supposedly makes studying easier. Another issue, I've always been really good at language and word problems but have noticed Adderall has shot my critical thinking skills to shit, for real. I over analyze(shocking right?) and come up with answers that are way off target. Ummmm will that go away? Math is different cuz it's one of those it is what it is things. I hate to think I've permanently lost the ability to grasp nuance tho. Damn, I'm depressed.

I'm pretty sure my doc was. I like the guy though. He means well. Weird right?

I can't get it to post or delete those as I am iPhone retarded, but here's the link. http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8pec4zpwQ1qelkv8o1_500.jpg

This is the best one I found today. I so needed to laugh. My friend and I were discussing some heavy stuff and he informed me his wife is pregnant. I'd been waiting to use this one. Best part? He thought it was funny.

Your story gives me hope. I lost a friend recently as well. One of my best friends, and because adderall made me so reclusive, that says a lot, and I'm having a bad time with guilt. The withdrawal mood swings make all of this seem like the worst time ever. Congratulations on staying strong and keep posting, cuz knowing how others are coping with all these aspects I've got kicking helps a lot.

The school post is such a beacon. I'm terrified to start back up in school. Luckily I guess I have to wait for residency to kick in. I have the smarts but school is rough! I did so well and now focusing on anything is virtually impossible. It's true Adderall makes you late on everything. I've obsessed and ended up butchering quite a few assignments trying to make them "the besteverdefinitelygettinpublishedforthisgem" and not turning them in period. And neglecting my friends, people who needed me, as well. It seems adderall addiction is common amongst the law and med school set. Sucks.

That's a plus. How long does it take? There doesn't seem to be a concrete Google answer as most would have you believe Raynaud's is "rarely" a side effect of Adderall. I already have to squeeze into my "fat pants". I'm just so bummed. My life is in shambles and while it isn't all the fault of drugs, I have come to accept that it hasn't helped at all. The depression isn't being helped by the fact that in addition to all my stupid problems a very good friend of mine committed suicide this weekend. Not because of meds, he was just sad I guess. I feel so horrible because I've been worried about this and he never said anything at all that would indicate there was a problem. I talked to him Friday and he was asking when I'd be down to visit again. I said I wasn't sure, in my head scared to go back because I didn't trust myself not to go to my doctor. I've got to go back for his funeral. It's such private stuff, I feel weird telling strangers, almost like talking to the air, but I'm cold, and I'm sad and it all seems so inadequate a description.

Maybe he will see it. The post about making it through the MCAT gave me so much hope. I was awarded a very incredible scholarship to a totally rad school, Chapel Hill, and they were going to pay for everything. All I had to do was finish my associates, and only had a semester left. But I got sick from all of the chaos in my life and knew I had to move. I gave it up, pissed a lot of people off, but none more than myself. The people in my life were making success impossible, and adderall couldn't keep up with the insane demands I was making on my body and just stopped working. That's the thing for those on the academic route, if you keep burning the candle at both ends eventually it's going to disappear. I know I'm smart on my own and the drive will come back but it sucks. This was a second career decision for me after 10 in a completely different field. I'm 30. My worry is I'll be too old for med school by the time I get done. Adderall eventually makes you stupider fyi. It helped a lot for me in the beginning but toward the end nothing registered properly and I was having to spend far longer to get the material than before I'd ever taken it. I hope it gets better, cuz right now things seem so bad. I hope if any students read this though, stop taking adderall, if you have the slightest grasp on long term effects, quit, because it won't last and will destroy your endeavors in the end.

This is so true. I was awesome 2 years ago, and from there it's gotten icky. I miss the thin girl with the 4.0. Idk what to do with the unemployed drop out who is decidedly less attractive and already 15 lbs heavier. Adderall stopped working for weight since I moved and have been tapering. This is the first day I have taken 0 in so long and I miss the old me, just not sure which one. Thanks for the quote.

I feel your pain. Quitting is the best thing you can do though, if you want to have a baby. The stories all over this board about the suckiness of coming off adderall are from adults. I haven't looked up anything on adderall withdrawal in newborns specifically, but from various other news reports and stuff I've seen on drug dependency it's really bad. I don't think a baby could possibly benefit from coming out of the womb hooked on something so strong. And who knows what effect it has on the development. Its gotta do something jacked to forming neurological processes, IMO. Stay strong and you'll get there. I'm miserable right now and foggy and depressed myself, but seeing others going through the same thing and those who've made it is such a help. You have support and that's the biggest thing.

Also, does the blue fingers thing go away ever? It'd be nice not to be so cold and deathly looking.

The health part does suck. I am ready it just sucks being so, so tired. And I hate being fat. It's a shallow concern but so is the major reason for quitting, I want my hair back. Plus I know better. That's what makes it so embarrassing. It isn't the first time. Happened when I was in HS too, only I was prescribed Dexedrine then. I figured it was that I was young and stupid about it and with an adult mentality things would be fine. Well, I was super wrong and this time I've gone and gotten myself sick. IDK on flushing them. I should. It's just so final.

Hi. It's taken me so much just to get to this point, the point where I admit I have a severe effing problem. I am 30 and in the process of weaning, because I have managed to thrash my system rather soundly by eating pills, as prescribed and all and am rather ill. I've cut from 40 mgs, 2 20 mgs a day for the past 2 1/2 or so years to 10 mgs 2x a day for 2 weeks and now at 5 mgs once a day for the past 2 days. I had 1/2 a pot of coffee and a monster mini can and this is the second 2 hour stint I've been awake in the past 24 hours. I feel like dogshit and I kinda hate everyone. Its been a garbage year but back to the ill part, and why its taken me so long to admit its a problem, I am a perfectionist. And adderall made me perfect. I got suuuuuper thin( read 5'5, 110, and toned, sooo kinda like skeletor with a fake tan and long hair) I mean I was hot, oh! and smart, genius style. I went back to school, my logic for taking them, and was getting a 4.0 etc, and then I got sick. First lethargic and acne, and weird rashes from my tanning shennanigans and fragrances, and then the flu, and then bronchitis, and then mono. I started constantly feeling cold and having blue fingers and toes, so what did I do? I bought a mini heater to drag around....cuz that's normal. And then my hair started falling out. It changed texture and snaps off at the slightest provocation. It's gone from almost waist length dark brown glossy awesomeness (I have always had a thing with my hair, don't judge!) to above my shoulders and firmly under a hat cuz its gross. I had my thyroid checked out during the mono sitch, levels are well within normal, soooo its probably time I admit no its not some mystery ailment, its that I brought this upon myself by being an insecure spaz with illusions of grandeur. I googled adderall side effects and after some weird and crazily biased sites stumbled across this one. I don't have health insurance. I recently moved to escape the unhealthy situation, the story is worse and a lot sadder but would take forever to get into fully and I'm working on the perfectionist thing. I am definitely hellbent on quitting after reading all the stories on the site. So hi folks, I look like hell and feel worse, now what?