Kyle_Chaos
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Posts posted by Kyle_Chaos
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I started taking this supplement nightly a few nights ago. I have been in an abnormally good mood the past few days.. it could just be me feeling slightly better, not exactly sure. It's worth a try
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The video was amusing, but you have a history of saying really upsetting things. You think its funny when children get hurt? We al come here to lean on one another. These types of comments that you make are counter productive and very upsetting to me. Many of us are suffering in our quitting process. It certainly hasn't been easy for me and I was on a super low dose, but I'm dealing with the aftermath of depression. Reading things like that that you write are just plain awful. Please be mindful of this.
I don't find children getting maimed or killed funny, but watching a youtube compilation of children getting injured is funny to me.
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Yesterday was a nice warm spring day and I had a lot of yard work planned because the entire month of April has been cold and wet around here and the snow just finally melted for good. I have several yard projects I have been itching to get started on. I also had some supply shopping to get done on my day off. Anyway, the phone rang before 9 AM and it was a friend from another town. They (married friends) wanted to come and visit me. We usually have long visits and sometimes they stay overnight. I told her I was working in my yard but I would love to see them too, so "come on by". So they arrived about noon, we drank a beer or two, went out to dinner and they left after that.
These are friends whom I have known for over 20 years. Never an adderall connection with this friendship. But I can't tell you how many times they had called while I was tweaking and I would either
1) not answer the phone because I wasn't "taking calls that day"
2) answer the phone but lie about what I was doing
3) delay returning their calls until much later
4) act weird and busy when they showed up unnanounced
Essentially, I was dissing my friends and sometimes my family because I was too goddamn "busy doing projects" on adderall. Couldn't be bothered with a social visit, and the thought of giving up a half day of busy work for anything was unsettling. Couldn't spend too much time just talking on the phone, either.
I am glad that my friends and other people in my life can be forgiving of my selfish behavior regarding social time. I thoroughly enjoyed our visit yesterday and still managed to get most of my shit done. This "normal" balance of friends, work and life was simply not possible in the later stages of my adderall addiction, and I am grateful it is forever behind me.
I would like to wish everybody who has read this post a happy and friendly Spring!
I can relate to that, it's impossible to abuse Adderall and maintain any sort of relationship after a while.
It makes anyone "all ego"
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Would you like to share any of the gory details with us, or was it just a standard relapse?
I hadn't really mentioned much about it until now, I didn't want a big thing made of it because I'm already going through a lot with getting out of the military.
It was just a standard relapse.
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Kyle. Hahaha. You're the best.
I had no idea who he meant, my picture isn't really all that frightening.
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than watching someone injure themselves.
When children get hurt it's even more funny
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Kyle,
I thought you had far over a month clean??
Nah, I relapsed about a month ago.
Luckily once I get out of the Air Force (in a month) I will no longer have access to medication and I definitely won't be able to afford it.
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I posted a few weeks ago writing that I thought I had "nearly recovered." I must have had one too many red bulls that day, because that isn't the case at all. I'm nearly a month clean and because of the severity of my relapse, it's like I'm starting all over.
Just a word of advice to anyone who gets tempted, you'll be right where I am. I feel as bland as a sack of potatoes.
It's definitely not worth it to feel like "god" for a few hours when you'll be feeling less than human for about 4-6 months.
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You are incorrect. According to the Book of Mormen The Lamenites were cursed with dark skin but became what we refer to as the native anericans, not black or African Americans. I believe that The bulk of the BOM concerns events that allegedly took place in North America
I'm not incorrect, Reddit.com is incorrect.
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Today I learned that mormons believe black people are black because god cursed them.
Book of Mormon
Wherefore, as they were white and exceedingly fair and delightsome, that they might not be enticing unto my people the Lord God did cause a skin of blackness to come upon them (2 Nephi 5:21)
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I seriously doubt they cause any harm, I just know they can repair alcohol damage.. and since I have been a stereotypical Airman and have been wasted for almost two years of my enlistment.. I am positive there is damage.
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I think this may be the same as piracetam, which I started taking more consistantly recently. It does seem to help a bit with memory.
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has anyone else heard of this? I ordered some a long time ago and have been taking it nightly, it seems to make my dreams vivid and it's supposed to fix alcohol related damage in the brain.
I do, however, find it odd that it's been recently taken off amazon.com
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Dispite my relapses, I feel like I am nearly recovered.. my cognition is about where it's always been. I am motivated and happy most of the time, and I have always been a negative person so...
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I think the Lexapro has been good for me overall actually. Now, klonopin could have something to do with it. I don't abuse it, never had the desire to, but even 1 mg a day could be messing with my brain. I just have legit anxiety, so I know quitting that will be a process.
I see, I've been tempted to try Lexapro because it'd be nice to have something that acts on serotonin rather than dopamine.
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Do you still take Lexapro? If you are, that could be slowing you down a lot mentally.. I know when I took Celexa (which is almost exactly the same as Lexapro) it made me feel like I was mentally retarded.LilTex,
Ahh....so relieved to read your post. I have a year, and I can't say I'm fully recovered, but I'm making big strides. Sometimes I'm thinking I should be further along in my recovery, and I even wonder, is this it? I KNOW that this is better than adderall life, and I don't think I give myself enough credit sometimes. I think the most important thing is that I'm learning to live life on life's terms, and I'm doing it without relying on that stupid pill. Just wanted to thank you, girl. I'm so happy for you that you feel fully recovered! We should all be happy to read this
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That they do.. I will illegally download a few of the songs on the list when I get the chance.
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Nice list! My post was a complete joke, btw.. Manowar is the cheesiest band ever.
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At one point in the video, the drummer knocks the highhat off of his drums..
now that's BRUTAL!
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I believe your brain will be as sharp as it was, but if you're comparing it subconsciously or consciously to the speed that the mind works on speed then it's always going to feel slow in comparison.
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I went back through the forum's to look for motivational posts..
Hopefully this helps.
"It's taken me about 8-9 months to start feeling like myself again on a regular basis, or at least to feel like I've finally broken through to the other side. I was really afraid that my sense of humor was lost forever. It's just now started to return to the same level as before adderall. I felt supremely unfunny and serious for the first 8 months off adderall (and on adderall too - one of my reasons for quitting). Maybe I was just so depressed in the first 6 months or so of sobriety that it was buried down somewhere deep and couldn't surface. My emotions and moods were all over the map too - still are to some extent - but like I said, I now feel like I'm starting to cross over to another phase of growth after addiction. It is frustrating, the chasm between what you want yourself to feel and act like and what is actually happening. It does eventually sync up, but be prepared for a long wait. I think that's the most helpful thing to know - that it may take you 9 months, or a year, or longer, to feel that syncronization occuring. To feel like you are starting to 'know' yourself again, your wants, interests, who you are deep down. The point at which things start to make sense again internally.
Have you ever heard the saying: "The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease."? I thought it was Hippocrates or Plato who said that, but I'm glad I looked it up because it was actually Voltaire (I was way off!) Well, I think that holds true for quitting drugs. You do whatever it takes to get through the early stages of recovery and distract yourself from the misery and confusion that accompanies your newfound sobriety, because ultimately the only real 'cure' is time.
So, what are you going to do to amuse yourself while you wait for time to heal your brain, body and spirit? I don't believe there is anything 'amusing' about forcing yourself to engage in social interactions if you don't want to. Do what you want to do. If you want to see people, go out. If you want to stay home and be a hermit, do that. For me, I just tried to focus on being as healthy as possible because eating healthy and exercising felt good to me, and I think it helped recover faster (however minimally). The first time I tried to quit I forced myself to jog all the time and I was miserable. So, the second time, I just walked when I felt like I should exercise and it was a lot easier. Do whatever feels good to you and doesn't feel forced in any way. That will only add to your mental resistance.
Anyway, I hope this helps a little. I took adderall for the same length of time as you, and I really relate to all the thoughts you've been experiencing
-Cassie"
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I just listen to this!
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I hope so too -- that's why I've been so obsessed with lions mane mushroom supplements. I do feel better overall though. A lot better.
I feel a bit better too. I refuse to believe that we've permanently ruined ourselves from abusing amphetamines. If you exercise and read often/study to improve cognition, the brain can still grow.. it is a muscle, after all.
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It's like this article
http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/93w0h/i_am_a_former_meth_addict_ama/
You can expect it to be dull for a while, I've heard from most people on the forums that it was around 9 months before they felt better.
Genesis Pure rehydration and energy supplements
in Supplements, Energy Drinks, and Alternatives
Posted
It's expensive stuff, but holy cow do I feel great! Look into it!