Motivation help

[Emmz12]

14 months in, and still doing poorly. I'm mainly suffering from low motivation and energy levels. I'm still wondering if it's actually depression that's really at play l, and I was using adderall to treat that as well as ADD. I never abused adderall, but I was on it from a very young age (6 years old!) and used it daily (between 10 to 20 mg daily) for 20 years. I was not fictional when I was off it. Could not find the motivation to get out of bed, always hungry, couldn't keep my legs still, (having a mix between restlessness and low motivation to move is a very mentally exhausting battle). Well I wanted to know if I could actually function off of adderall if I quit. So I weaned off of it for about a year, and now I've been off of it for 14 months. Some of my symptoms have proven to be withdrawl. They went away in the first couple of months. Motivation and energy have yet to come about. I walk around with no sense of purpose, sometimes not leaving my house all day, often bargaining with myself to even get out of bed. To me this sounds like depression, although I'm not sad. Feeling hopeless, yes, but not sad really. I was on cymbalta for a while and that made the hopelessness go away... I was content in my laziness... but still low motivation and energy levels. Now I have just started taking sertraline... it hasn't started working yet. Looking for suggestions on which supplements to take to help with the motivation and the energy. 

Was thinking Wellbutrin, DL-phenylalanine, or lithium orotate... thoughts?

[Emmz12]

I might add that I have tried l-tyrosine and it didn't seem to help much, neither has fish oils and DMAE made me feel 100 times worse! 

[EricP]

I really don’t know if there is any one trick to help this common complaint. Each of us is different in our recovery however our complains are very similar. I was also on sertraline and can say it helped curb some morning depression for me however it did nothing to modivate. I stopped after a few weeks however my doc said I should have given it at least 3mo to truly evaluate. 

As for supplements I think taking Tyrosine as well as multi vitamins, B’s etc may just help fuel the body a bit as a foundation however nothing that you will really “feel”. 

Mucuna pruriens is an interesting one over the counter to try on a low dose. Many people use it for mental clarity, fitness etc however it is basically natural form of L-dopa. I have tried a few times and definitely feel clearer minded on the days I have used it. I just don’t think it should be used long term or every day. For me it just helped confirm that low dopamine is the main issue as by adding this my brain worked better. I am reserving it use to once a week max just to avoid getting stuck dependent on anything else. 

Is your energy lows every day or do you sometimes have some or any ok days then crash? 

[Frank B]

Can relate it’s very hard last it seems forever. Can’t imagine starting that young and for so long congrats for making it this far off it!  I know one member is looking to start a class action lawsuite. To me anyone who was forced this narcotic against his or her free will should be compensated heavily for the pain and suffering of withdraw. For me it was a choice sort of knew anything that felt that good I was going to have to stop and go through hell eventually and I was right. 

[Emmz12]

On 2/16/2018 at 6:55 PM, EricP said:

Is your energy lows every day or do you sometimes have some or any ok days then crash? 

My energy levels start out low but then increase over time. I'm a bartender so most days I don't wake up until noon, get energized by 6 and then go to bed by 2 am... it's more my motivation that's the problem. I don't want to do anything on my days off but just sit on the couch or in bed watching TV. If I have plans with people I go,  and I usually have a good time, but most people are at work during his time. I think I was mentally better off during a time where I had a normal 9 to 5 job. I can get myself out of bed to go to work, but not if I don't have anything to do...

[SleepyStupid]

18 hours ago, Emmz12 said:

My energy levels start out low but then increase over time. I'm a bartender so most days I don't wake up until noon, get energized by 6 and then go to bed by 2 am... it's more my motivation that's the problem. I don't want to do anything on my days off but just sit on the couch or in bed watching TV. If I have plans with people I go,  and I usually have a good time, but most people are at work during his time. I think I was mentally better off during a time where I had a normal 9 to 5 job. I can get myself out of bed to go to work, but not if I don't have anything to do...

i totally relate to this. i spent over a year basically shuffling through work, coming home, and just watching TV for hours. weekends would be wake up, eat, watch TV, nap, wake up, watching TV, go to bed. lol

i started taking Wellbutrin again recently and I think it has helped a ton with the depression , but as you said, the major effect is making me "content with my laziness". but i think i'm okay with that, because depression is a feedback loop nightmare- you're depressed about being depressed about being unmotivated. so at least it breaks you out of that cycle.

the thing is, even taken as prescribed like you have for 20 years, the point of the medication was never to "motivate" you to do things in life, right? adderall is SUPPOSED TO be prescribed to alleviate ADHD in children, which really has nothing to do with motivation. at this point, if you can drag yourself to work and more or less function in society, you don't need adderall (and possibly never needed it?). it's a God damn shame that you were put on this stuff so young, and i don't know what your condition was like at 6 years old, but i'd argue that every negative feeling in your life is now a result of adderall- not any kind of latent ADHD or depression.

that being said, i've never had any success with any specific supplement, but Wellbutrin has helped a lot. it is an atypical anti-depressant, and works a bit more on energy than mood (in theory anyway). it also has far less side-effects than other anti-d's, and there is little to no withdrawal if you decide to come off it. perhaps you can discuss this option with your doctor if the other meds don't help.

[EricP]

18 hours ago, Emmz12 said:

My energy levels start out low but then increase over time. I'm a bartender so most days I don't wake up until noon, get energized by 6 and then go to bed by 2 am... it's more my motivation that's the problem. I don't want to do anything on my days off but just sit on the couch or in bed watching TV. If I have plans with people I go,  and I usually have a good time, but most people are at work during his time. I think I was mentally better off during a time where I had a normal 9 to 5 job. I can get myself out of bed to go to work, but not if I don't have anything to do...

I would say your job must be a challenge in ways due to the hours and not having a normal sleep cycle. Hopefully your room is dark so you can at least fake your body into a normal cycle. I would have low morning modivation also with those hours!

Interesting for me I sometimes have a little morning depression that slows me down however for the most part I am good in the beginning of the day as the day goes on I get more of an afternoon low. I can usually fight thru it and keep going. However on long work days if I put in like 12hrs the next day I am literally beat. Possibly you have the same response except your powering thru 2am and then having a similar crash in the morning...