Searchingsoul9

Love you! She was angry at me i guess. She has dated many addicts and i guess she has no faith i will change. She says most people need to lose it all before they fix their life. I don't know. I plan to prove her wrong. My dad has been very supportive and helpful, so that's good. I am doing alright otherwise. Day 6, almost day 7. Feels like a blur How are YOU?!

No worries, just was confused. I hate most doctors too, to be honest.

Thanks! The first part of your comment confused me a bit. Were you being sarcastic? I believe that whether or not a doctor prescribes it, anything that you abuse can be considered an addiction. I am an addict. I hate to say it, but it is the truth. Day 5 is going much better. Hope all is well

Ah. I just can't wait to laugh again. And to feel some emotion other than anger/sadness

Thank you<3

Wow, forgot i posted this one. Wish i felt as clear headed as i sounded then right now.

Thank you! I honestly don't know what i would do without this site. I have been binging on Netflix HARDCORE. haha. Sleeping anytime i am not working. Even took a 20 minute nap at work. It's pathetic how tired i am. It wasn't even this bad the last time around. How long did your sleepy cycle last? I was hoping i'd be a bit better by day 7, but now i am not too sure. xox

They were very concerned, still are. Angry, sad, glad i am trying to stop...again. I feel sick.

Insurance reports

So, today is day 4. The past few days have sucked. The one person i told and thought i could count on is not talking to me, due to another situation. A stupid one at that. Yesterday my mom and dad found out i had been using again. Having a big family meeting tomorrow. And i decided to tell my one close friend and now she is mad and "disappointed" in me for being "just another drug addict" Why, now that i chose to stop does this all come out? This just sucks. I feel emotionless. Tired when i need to be awake and wired when i should be sleeping. I am in major brain fog. All i feel is anxiety, anger, and sadness.

Day 3. Horrible. Family found out about my use. Of course, right when i stop. But just drank and was SUPER depressed lastnight. Today, slept most of the day. Was supposed to go out and celebrate Halloween tonight. Too lazy and in this major brain fog.

Day 2 conformation. Feeling lazy. Slept 12 hours. Ate junky food. Want to sleep more, but have work in an hour. GR

Thank you! You guys all helped me so much last time i quit. I just need to be stronger this time and post daily

Thank you! I am excited. So far i don't feel much. Assuming it is still in my system. If it's anything like the last time, i expect to be in a sleep coma the next few days. Told my therapist i had been using and that i am stopping.

Exercise NEEDS to be a priority in my recovery. Great ideas xo

First official day will be October 24, 2013 Since it is now midnight, i guess day one is today!

L O V E Thanks for just making my night. *Dancing*

I like that. I need to take up meditation again. Well, i can't really say i was practicing before...seeing as i only tried it out for a week. It is great, but very difficult. Anyway, I seriously look forward to getting rid of this horrible addiction. It's such hell. As you know Glad to be back

Need ideas for healthier outlets. Things to keep me occupied and entertained when I am not working. Down time is my weakness.

Thank you I know it won't be easy, but it's time to let it go. How are u?

Glad to see a familiar face I wouldn't have posted if i was not ready to give this thing another go I truly have no choice but to stop. I am getting too old for this shit xo

Thank you! I didn't think anyone would have any experience with warts. I have been trying for months to get approved for the dermatologist. Making appointment tomorrow. I am sure that the warts are unrelated, because i had the plantar on the bottom of my foot since i was 12. But i believe the adderall/weed/alcohol binges definitely weakened my immune system...allowing them to spread like mad. Thanks for the tips!

I haven't really thought much about a legit plan. I just KNOW that it needs to stop, now. So i tossed the last like 3 pills i had left and tomorrow will once again be 'day 1' I am SO not looking forward to the sleepfest. I experience it every month when i run out of pills early. It involves me eating a lot of crap, barely making it through work, and sleeping as much as possible. Which still never seems to be enough. I have faith that after a week of detox though that i will get over the fatigue. I appreciate the support so much. I had debated quitting every now and again these past few months, but i was too ashamed to come back on here. Today i knew if i came back that you all would hold me accountable for my actions. And i need that. So thank you

Thank you I have fallen more times than i've gotten back up. I just seem to fall further and get more discouraged. But, i am ready to give it my all this time. 30 day challenge accepted Sounds like a great idea.