Subtracterall

Ah ha. Psychosis and tampons are a bad combo. Even tho I was on a low dose toward the end of my use I'm pretty sure I was having "mild" psychosis because I was very confused and seeing bugs in the corners of my eyes and I had to stop using tampons toward the end because I could not keep track and would lose them monthly. It never occurred to me until now that my adderall use could be the reason I could not keep track of my tampons. Ended up at the doctors having one removed. How awful and embarrassing. I'm using tampons again now in my sober state and I am able to keep track of them much much better. In fact since I quit addy I haven't lost any tampons.

Gosh where do I start? I was so socially awkward all the time that I never did make many friends at work. I never wanted to talk to my co-workers when I was on addy which was all the time. I had "more important" things to do like working. I was this way for so many years. I've been looking back over my scadderall days and things are starting to make sense in a way I had not been able to recognize before. One time in particular I remember a co-worker and I were sort of becoming friends because we both took smoke breaks at the same time at work. She asked me to go to a movie one evening and I said no and never followed up with her to reschedule or anything. Because I didn't need friends you see I had adderall and that's all I needed. How flipping backward! So I got a reputation at work as someone who was anti social and a b!tch and that particular co-worker was very nice but she hated me after that for many, many, many years.. Whenever the girls at work would plan something I was never invited and at the time I was glad but I just thought they didn't like me and I didn't care! Looking back on it is embarrassing.. I also wonder now if being on adderall is the reason I could not find a job for two years in a row. Surly I was a complete tweeted out mess at the interviews. I finally did land another job... and I'm now thinking maybe that was because I was sober at that interview...and probably because I was living in a while new city where no one knew the old adderall me. interesting how perceptions of ourselves on adderall change after we get sober and are able to look back with a clear mind.

Hi Faith. I've been having the exact same frustrations at work since being off addy and I want to commend you for taking control of your recovery and reaching out for help. I wish I had done that but I didn't and I actually messed something up at work when I was first coming off addy and I have yet to fix it but I will ASAP. no one has noticed so far thank goodness. What you did took a lot of courage and I really think it was the right thing to do.please keep us posted on how you are coming along! I have been noticing some improvement in my performance at work and my brain functioning in general these past two days and coincidentally I started taking ginkgo and fish oil late last week. I have to wonder if it is helping my brain function at work. When I first quit I napped in my car over my lunch break every day. I work in IT so our jobs are somewhat similar in that we both have to sit and concentrate for long periods.. I have been thinking of a career change but like you I have a mortgage and bills etc. sorry to ramble. On a side note I am feeling really good physically and hope you are too! It feels good to be off that junk!

One of my parents was recently diagnosed with dementia and Parkinsonism. This parent was adopted so their medical history was always a mystery until a few months ago. It's one of the reasons I am able to stay off addy now so easily. My parent is young (early 70s). Needless to say I 'm very concerned over my parents recent diagnosis for them and for myself as well for obvious reasons. I am trying to come to terms that I will likely come down with both of these myself sometime in the next 30 years and my life will be over. how do I stop this from happening to me? Is it even possible?

Hi iwish, i can relate to what is happening to your weekends. Not because I ran out early but because I was so tired every Saturday and Sunday from being on addy all the work week that if I didn't take a little addy on the weekends I would sleep straight through and miss the whole weekend. I'm clean now and this is no longer a problem for me. I'm awake on weekends naturally and it's flipping awesome. I hope you are doing aright and still thinking about quitting. I've come to a realization that we have two choices. Quit or die. It really is that serious because one cannot take this stuff forever. Old bodies cannot handle addy. So you will eventually have to quit anyway and it will be much easier to do it while you are young.

For people who are in recovery, how long did it take for that morning fatigue feeling to go away? When do you wake up feeling truly rested? I've searched all on this site and can't find a good description of this. I used for approx 12 years 20-40 per day so I know I have a ways to go. Thanks.

Thanks Frank. I'm going to try that and see how far it gets me. Sometimes it's just good to get this stuff off your chest. I really appreciate your response.

I've built up a career around adderall and I am failing miserably without it. I can't think straight anymore. I can't remember what I did last month, two months ago. Every time I start a task I have to relearn everything I already did before. My brain is damaged. I'm scared. Any similar stories? I've read on here that people change careers after they quit. I don't know how much longer I can pull this off - I mean fooling everyone to think I know what I'm doing when I suck at my job right now. I have no no one to talk to about this. no one knows. I'm freaking out!

Quit-Once, May I please inquire as to how long you have been off addy and how are your legs and feet now? Do you still have muscle twitches in your legs and feet? Do you have any other symptoms in your legs and feet? Do you have any vericose veins in your legs? I am trying to figure out whether my veins in my legs will stop failing since i'm off addy now and have had the damaged leg veins removed. Thank you.

Is there anyone in your life who loves you unconditionally who you feel you can trust with this secret? Have you considered asking that person for help? You sound like you have people who love you and would do anything for you. It's okay to ask for help. I wish I had asked my mom for help years and years ago. She would have paid for rehab but I was too ashamed. Now I'm dealing with long term health consequences and I would not want that for anyone.

I'm not craving adderall during this quit and I've been clean for approx one month. Is it possible for adderall to make your body so physically sick that taking more of it does not seem appealing? My physical body feels better and relaxed now that I am off the adderall. Maybe that's why this concerns me. Did I damage my body so badly with adderall that the thought of taking it again makes me feel sick?

i sure hope not. Have you tried taking Melatonin before bed each night? Maybe worth a try. I started taking it every night before bed after I read this. https://www.lewrockwell.com/2016/12/bill-sardi/lose-weight/

First time I quit because I got pregnant and I stayed clean for two more years after that to breastfeed my child. Stupidly I decided to pick the habit up once again after I weened my two year old. This time I quit because I developed a horrific and painful case of vein disease in my legs. I highly suspect adderall caused early onset of this disease and exasterbated this chronic health issue which I will be dealing with for the rest of my life. At the end of the day my legs and feet are so tired they feel like they will explode. and I've been clean one month.

Hi Faith. Congrats on your decision to quit. I can relate to a lot of what you said. The part about religion - me too exactly! I could have written that myself. I'm at work so I can't write much right now but wanted to chime in and say hi. You're not alone here in Texas. I'm here too. Been clean since January 11. Behind on two projects at work. I have to get up and walk often to keep my circulation going which is making me fall further behind. I calm my anxiety by saying to myself I am only human and I am doing to very best I can and that's all I can do. Be kind to yourself. Hang in there. You can do this.

20-40 mg for 12 years. Last year I had terrible leg cramps at night and ankle and foot swelling during the day which landed me at the doctor’s office. I quit adderall cold turkey and had a bunch of leg vein treatments to remove the broken veins. My legs seemed stable for a while, so I thought I will just use a smaller dose and it will be okay, right. Wrong. Even a small dose makes the pressure in my legs unbearable. My feet have been tingling and hurting so badly. So I went back to the doctor. More broken veins in my legs. This time the treatments will be even more extensive. So I quit. 30 days ago. The withdrawls were minor compared to the depression and fear over dealing with leg vein problems for the rest of my life and possibly becoming disabled. At one point I could barely walk or even sit in a chair. Yet I continued to take it.. I’m 42. Last night in the shower there was so much pressure in my feet I could barely stand up. I just wish I could hear from someone that had this problem or knows someone who did and that they made a full recovery after they quit. All of my blood work was “Normal”. Ultrasound on legs show NO blood clots. Am I going to be okay? Does anyone know anyone who went through this and came out on the other side able to jog again? I started doing palates for one hour every morning before work and it is helping. I am not overweight although I have gained approx. 10 lbs since quitting. I am taking L-tyrosine, horse chestnut, vitamin C, zinc, B12, Vitamin D, Multivitamin.

Yes. I have this. Shea27 it's been a while since you've been here but if you see this please write back and tell us how you are doing. I'm going to have both great saphanous veins closed next week. I've already lost a lot of leg veins. Vein disease runs in my family but I'm only 42 and my mother never had these problems this young so I suspect my sedentary job and no exercise plus adderall caused my veinous disease. My understanding is it's permanent and progressive. I'm very upset and depressed over this and feel like a complete fool. I'm clean now for 30 days. I am ashamed to say how long I took this drug. I will never take it again. I miss it but my legs kill my desire for it. I'm very scared about what I have done to my body.