waronwar

LILTEX, Yes, I visted the website and think it seems like a really good place for support. I'm not sure I get the whole thing though. I wondered if you could start in an anonymous way or if it is a meetings everyday, tell your name kind of thing. Anyway, I like the tools and things they have available. Please share anything else like this if you think it will be helpful... for me I really like homework and tools to help me work through the stuff in my head. Adderall is the only thing that has really gripped me like this. Thanks for sharing!

I took organic chem 1 and 2 evry day one summer. My friend and I ate tons of adderall and I did terrible. We would pull all nighters and I would "study", except I was too tweaked out and nervous and did even worse....I failed the 2nd part and had to retake it. It still didn't stop me from taking adderall. I know for a fact that ,by that point it was definitely not helping me w/ school. In my mind of course, I liked to tell myself it did. I'm in the same boat as you... still trying to fight this demon. I HAVE to quit but I am so scared to let it go... Sigh. The main reason for me is severe chronic fatigue (possible narcolepsy). I am so afraid of living in a bed again, but willing to get a sleep study and do whatever it takes to live a normal life again... even if I have to be sleeping most of it I need this forum more than ever!

Also, are you or were you a user of smart recovery? I'm curious also if you are sober or at least free from whatever your addiction/s were?

Thanks for sharing... I have seen that website and forgot where I had seen it and all of the helpful tools/activities. I am going to work on this asap and visit the site too!

Hmmm... I would have to ask my dentist first. I also heard that very few dentists know the "safe" way to remove them (asyou mentioned). Apparently while removing them the vapors can be harmful to you and whoever is around, unless they are trained. To be trained properly would make you stand out to the Am Dental Association and you can get in trouble... or so I have read/watched. Thanks for your help... I know that's definitely part of my problem b/c I have felt like crap since I was young. Anytime I have a cleaning or anything that stirs that stuff up I feel super sick to my stomach. I am going to get my teeth cleaned on Monday... maybe I will inquire about the price, but as I said it won't be anytime soon. I have to do a sleep study, get allergy shots and so on. I just got married and therefore have insurance again.

Yeah that study is just big Government agencies shaking hands... I have a bachelor degree in dietetics (nutrition) and the ADA (Am Dietetic Assoc) shook hands w/ the FDA, USDA, etc. They are all in things for the money and they try not to create hysteria over things they would be sued like crazy for. It made me sick really... My dentist claims that mercury fillings are fine but I have this feeling it's just something that he made himself believe and does not care to think anymore than that about it. If he did he might have some lawsuits headed his way as well. The reason I have fillings is from when I was a kid and ate tons of candy and sugar. I take really good care of my teeth now to try and keep my whole mouth from being fillings Also, I wear a nightguard at night and haven't had headaches in years since I started wearing it and it is insurance for clenching which I do at night (with or w/out the adderall... Anyway, interesting topic to discuss for sure!

I have a mouth full of them and have a strange autoimmune illness, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, etc. I have read many books about this and I fully believe they are super poisenous. The American Dental Association has so much money backing that they are safe that many dentists will not admit that they are dangerous. I have even seen a few documentaries that had some pretty good info about the proof they are toxic and the fear the Am. Dental Assoc strikes fear in dentists openly claiming they are... Hope that made sense. I totally want to have mine replaced, but I think it will cost a fortune and I am a super anxious dental patient so they would prob. have to put me to sleep. Still, I plan to get it done. It's awesome to hear of how much bette you feel now that yours have been replaced!

I didn't know about it. I logged in last night for first time in a while and thought everyone was going to try Thursdays?

Wow, but sadly not surprising. It's never been more prescribed. I know the perils and I'm still experiencing them. it's big time. Anybody can get a script these days... mysister has some mental illness that came abot in the last ten years and she is an adderall addict along w/ extreme instability... Her doctors continue to prescribe even after they knew she has a serios problem. I have come close to calling the office. It's easy to get, but when medical professionals keep prescribing high doses to know addicts there's somethigng really wrong. I have many health problems and have severe legitimate pain. I have had casts and dental work... It's hard to get pain medicine even when you need them (like after surgery), but adderall is a free for all.

I know I don't know everyone, but I pop in from time to time when I realize the only people that might understand are right here. It's 4am and I got married last week which makes me so happy and so ready to get healthy and do what I can do that will get my head right (freed from the pill habitual). My head feels better and I'm in love, but I still have that old monkey weighing me down. Have you guys trialed any meetings? Are they chat sessions like an old school chat room or what? I am so down to do a metting/ chat whatever. My problem w/ this site is it doesn't let me know what's going on through email or anything and it's hard for me to find where my last chat session was etc. I guess I need to do the intro thing where I tell my story. I've been meaning to but I hate typing, and my story is ten years long... where to begin how to recap it all. I know that's pathetic... oh yeah and I have ADD and a lil dyslexia. But I'm super truthful, non-judgemental , loving, I'm sarcastic and love laughing and being silly I will post soon... I think if I learned the site better I could be more in touch.. I think that telling your story is a first step in saying we want to change and looking at yourself in the mirror so to speak. I know this place is the best for me... That post was so awful and rambled but that's why I hate to type. Look forward to hearing about chat/meetings. Hooray!

So on board! I actually emailed Mike about this and he didn't know it had been down and got it up and running. He said he thinks 5-10 may be the max number to chat but to let him know if we need to bump it up

True.. my fiance is in the militairy and he almost convinced me to join the reserves, but I knew w/ my health issues it wouldn't be a good fit. He told me you just don't tell them about anything and so it goes... as long as you can pass the drug tests. They do give the pilots amphetamines and have for decades.

Falcon it's a tough world and I can tell you I definitely get the blues.... they are the worst. I also have seasonal depression pretty bad and have most of my life. Hang in there and remember emotions/feelings are like waves... they come and they go. They are a natural part of life and we are supposed to feel things. Many of us just have to learn to cope with the bad feelings by feeling and working through them instead of numbing out. You are not alone. Stay strong... the sun will come out soon and it will get better

What kind of doctor? I have seen so many that just don't care or are clueless. It is a serious condition so they should give you information on the situation... This is not something that usually just pops up and goes away, although many things can flare it up yes. They should be informed enough to inform you and give you a little more information. It doesn't rule my life or anything... I have much worse issues than that One time an eye dr told me his dad lost a finger or 2 from it, which I didn't need to hear by the way, I knew it was no joke. When absesses or sores form on fingers they can get infected and that's when real problems or frostbite can occur. I always think when I'm older this will be more serious, but I'm an idiot b/c I always pick the cuticles around my nails and I should def not be doing that... along w/ many other things LOL. I don't have anyone treating me anymore but do have dcotors prescribe low mg norvasc and it works for a flare up. Just inform yourself about it... drs on't seem to care about me so I have to take matters into my own hands most of the time

Trust me I know the double edge sword thing with this drug. It's a real mess! Take care keep me posted. I am slowly learning to use the forums a lil better so sorry for the slow replies My hands are ice cold as we speak take care. you are definitely not alone.... now I know i am not either :)

Gosh I suck at replying on here b/c I couldn't figure out how to find my posts and wasn't getting notifications. I am kinda getting the hang of it now. You guys are awesome! Thanks for asking about my wedding... I don't want an actual wedding, but we will celebrate this summer. I live w/ my fiance and have for 3 years... we have been engaged for about a year and a half. Right now we are trying to get married asap b/c I need health insurance. Mine ran out at end of December and I have never been w/out it. My fiance is taking grad classes along w his full time job so no time for anything other than the legal binding til this summer. I am not stressing it and that is why i never wanted a wedding... not my kind of thing- being center of attention and stressing out, etc. I will do things my way and we celebrate w family and friends hopefully this summer

Crap i missed out on this! vegas convention! awesome! I am trying to learn how to use the forums... slowly getting the hang of it

That is a great movie! it talks about things like the really poor, hard working people in 3rd world countries that are completely happy w/ their lives. It makes you realize how spoiled we are and ungrateful at times.

I feel a quick connection to everyone and yes, Falcon you are the man! You are so real... it's beautiful. You are strong and caring and you just get it. You can help us all. I wonder if theres a way to have video meetings or group chats scheduled... could be great for us all. no idea where everyone is located. My profile is not working so I cannot edit my info or add a pic but have contacted our dear admin

I get constipated even when I step down my dose which is weird b/c I have IBS and never have a problem going. so this has been new to me. It's science though. Opiate addicts have diarhea when quitting and stimulant addicts have constipation. While using both have the opposite effects. It's just the human body trying to adjust to the chaos we have created for it

SOOO true. I would look in pockets, drawers, everywhere...and over the ten years or so i have only found lost pills maybe twice. moral of the story- i took every pill and there were very few that had a chance to slip away. So proud of you. That flushing had to be an empowering feeling! Love this site!!!

I know for me when I finally am able to really quit quit it will have to be cold turkey.

I am trying to log in more... Since I was little my hands and feet would swell and they are always cold and red. Yeah people always notice and I hate my hands. Drugs, alcohol, weed all flare this up in different ways. My parents and I had asked doctors about it my whole life and they were all just like duhhh... clueless. I started seeing a rheumatologist about 10 years ago for other auto-immune fatigue, pain issues and finally was diagnosed with raynauds syndrome. It's kind of rare, but yeah you can lose fingers. Aghhh. I can't think about it! She prescribed me a blood pressure drug (Norvasc) in the lowest dose. I only take this if a finger goes numb or something. Other than that just try to do what you can. I can't say you have the same thing as me, but every drug made it flare. Sometimes they even get burning red and swell. I, too, think adderall messed me up w/ weed. I am such a paranoid spazz on it. If I have had some drinks then it's cool. Basically I partake here and there but I can relate to exactly what you are saying about weed. Look I wish I posted in here more. I have struggled for almost a decade w/ this adderall crap. It's a double edged sword b/c I lived in my bed due to my fatigue before. I ended 2012 badly... like took a ton trying to say goodbye kind of thing. I'm about to get married and I really am sooo sick of it so have been using only my prescribed dose, have had a better focused head since new years.... except i screwed up today and took a little extra. damn. that's why i logged in to. to stay strong!

Searchingsoul, I don't post a whole lot but I have Raynauds syndrome and my hands are always freezing and red or purple. If that circulation thing continues see a rheumatologist. It's nothing to joke about and although rare, there are things they can do to help you. I haven't quit taking addies completely but take a manageable dose to get out of bed b/c I have severe chronic fatigue. I have been through the taking a ton though, and it's a roller coaster for sure. Best of luck!

Thank you... great idea. I am tired of the same old life... years of the same up and down routine. Caught up in the vicious cycle. This year IS different. I am getting married in a few weeks. I am so ready to leave the pills behind... I want a baby more than anything. I will be posting on here more b/c I will def. need support. I have been on meds for almost ten years and have had health issues as long as I can remember w/ severe fatigue ruling my life (pre-adderall). I used to practically live in my bed, which made me depressed but I always felt awful and still do a lot of the time. I have only unnaturally forced my way through w/ pharmaceuticals all this time, esp. adderall. Happy New year everyone. Hope to post very soon