sadderall

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Everything posted by sadderall

  1. Quitting Adderall

    I completely understand how you feel. You need to consider your mental health before working towards a big achievement. I got a prescription for adderall because I took on the pressure of attending a university I wasn't ready to attend. I would always be on adderall in class and so amped up about what I needed to do but wouldn't actually get it done. I would create plans for studying but would never do it - WOW talk about ultimate procrastinator. Now, being three months sober and taking a year long break from school, I can say that I finally understand how important it is to learn your body and mind. Know your learning techniques and learn about time management. I've also learned I am actually introverted versus who I was on adderall. I can now spend a whole day alone in my room and charge up for social interactions and be okay with that. Before I was dealing with the left over energy/anxiety adderall gave me and was drinking too much just to relax. Good luck on your journey Austin777
  2. Self Love

    sleepystupid has got a point. be present. There are small things i notice i have again since quitting. Like my sense of humor and my ability listen to people when having a conversation. good choice of throwing the pills down the drain. seriously. stay strong
  3. I wasn't sure where to post this topic so I posted it in general discussion. Has anyone taken Lexapro while on Adderall? While I was on adderall for a year I believed I was depressed and my doctor put me on Lexapro. Now Im almost hitting two months off adderall and I'm thinking I should get off the Lexapro as well. I'm scared I won't be able to handle it and become extremely emotionally unstable- although I feel like I'm emotionally numb most of the time. Any advice? Thank you all for being here.
  4. Hitting One Month w No Adderall

    Hope you both and the pups stayed safe during Irma. It does have 100% to do with what we put in our body. I've been going back and forth from eating really unhealthy to eating extremely healthy. It's a weird balance, but would be more affective if I were to eat 100% healthy. Last night I binged on sherbet ice cream, otis spunkmeyer muffins, and popsicles. Feeling pretty bad about it right now. I am trying to stop drinking but just filling the void with junk food. Its a struggle. I would recommend looking up "Jillian Michaels Biggest Loser" on youtube if you want to start working out. It's about an hour long but I usually do only 20 minutes of it just to get me sweating and endorphins up. Hope you are doing well on your journey too.
  5. So I'm on one month with no adderall. It's been a struggle. I am hungry all the time, have no motivation, and can see my muscles becoming flimsy. I've been taking L-Tyrosine as recommended as soon as I wake up on an empty stomach- it has been helping. I can see myself gaining weight as a opposed to when I was working out on adderall. It's such a bummer. Though there are some pros to quitting. Time doesn't feel like it's going by as fast. And my mouth isn't as cut up as it use to be. What are so practices that quitters on here have done to help them stay off adderall? To not help them eat all the time? Any book or podcast recommendations? Please help
  6. Hitting One Month w No Adderall

    OH CONGRATSSS!! We're in this together. How did you notice it stopped working? What's sam-e? Good advice on keeping no crappy food in the hous. Do you work out? I notice i've been drinking more actually which isn't good. I also take 10mg of lexapro everyday. You have such a supportive spirit. Thank you so much
  7. Kicked the door

    I can relate. Right now I was looking for my phone for about 20 min. I was looking everywhere and 15 minutes in just fucking yelled at the top of my lungs and punched the wall because I was so frustrated... then started crying. Turns out the phone was in my car. Now I'm in an ashamed/embarrassed/pissed mood. This too shall pass for us
  8. Back On Here Again

    Thanks for the tip! i'll buy them as soon as i can. THANK YOU
  9. Back On Here Again

    over the past few months i've cut my dosage down to 10mm a day. started a new job and stuck to this dosage. luckily they have an espresso machine at my new job. so anytime the adderall would wear off, i'd make a latte and would wake right up again. the past two weeks i've been been pretty stressed due to staying out late/not getting enough sleep/work and have been taking an extra 5mm on top of the 10mm. this added to stress because i told myself i quit that habit taking more than my normal dosage. two days ago i ran out of adderall and decided i will not ask for another refill. might as well not! im pretty much down to 10mm (some days 15mm) and feel like i should go cold turkey before i keep on upping my dosage. Oh goooood i hate this fight with this addiction. i hate adderall. i hate that i've started smoking cigarettes. I've been STRESS EATING like crazy, i know its because im not suppressing my hunger anymore. and on top of that eating so poorly. today i tried working out and got tired so quickly. it depresses me. i don't want to fall into depression again. what are some foods which helped with overall mental clarity and energy? please help. I love this community so much. Thanks for always being here <3
  10. Back On Here Again

    You're so right. I can completely stress eat no matter what food it is. I just need to put fruits in veggies in front of my face instead of popsicles and chips. Ooooh congrats on your move to manhattan!
  11. Back On Here Again

    Thank you so much for your support. I've been listening to Peter Brigins videos as I get ready for work. They really help me realize why it's worth quitting. Yesterday all I did was stay in and eat any chance I got but then I realized how I was stress eating and just went outside to take a walk. Cutting gluten has always been something I've wanted to try. I'll look into it. As for sleeping, I've been doing it so much. But I guess it's just my body catching up on sleep i've been missing out on. Thank you so much for you help megan. Stay strong.
  12. Where is everyone from?

    austin, tx
  13. Week 1

    Im 9 days without adderall. Week 1 was good, I was still motivated and happy to have myself back. But now I just feel tired and disconnected. I just want to be in bed all day and sleep. I have been having disassociation with my friends and the people I surround myself with. I get annoyed easily if people are talking about themselves too much or bias. I dont know why? I also just wonder off in conversation frequently and come off as rude. Did anyone else feel this way when quitting?
  14. This is my story..new to the site

    hey iwish, i can relate to you. I remember not having a refill and counting how many days I can spread out what I had for me. Kind of like weening myself off. I've been off adderall for two weeks now and honestly, what has been keeping me going is pushing myself to do things no matter what mood i'm in. So if friends invite me out, I go for it and do it for as long as I could. Or, any task which needs to get done, I do it at my own pace. Remember to be easy on yourself right now. Even if tasks and other things seem impossible to do, just do it at your own pace and get it done. I promise you will feel alot better than just avoiding it because you're not on adderall. Quitting cold turkey can be tough but is the best way. Your body will be fatigued at first but just remember to cope with it by giving it the sleep it desires at first to recover. Accept that your body will never be as energized and alert it was on adderall, and that it's okay. Eventually you will be able to tell what naturally energizes your body and it will feel much better than nasty old adderall with a shit ton of side effects. Hang in there buddy and keep up the good fight.
  15. Hearing Things

    Does anyone get anxiety to the point where they can hear things that arent really there?
  16. im about to come off adderall. what would you consider true hard work? what are some small techniques you do to get through work, the day, etc. just curious
  17. Eight Months!

    They are a godsend! They taste like nothing and are so healthy. I always buy in them in bulk at the grocery store and keep them in a jar in my kitchen. I throw them in my oatmeal, salads, on top of toast with avocado, in cereal, etc. Watch out for flaxseed though, it can make you go to the bathroom.
  18. Checking In

    congrats, flow3! your positivity is shining and helps me look forward to life without adderall.
  19. Eight Months!

    congrats on your eight months mark! Exercising helps sooooo much. And eating healthy too. I've found that superfoods such as chia seeds and flax seeds help a lot with energy and clearing that mental fog.
  20. what do you consider "hard work"?

    Thanks BeHereNow! I'm glad people appreciate my question. Your answer is one which has been motivating me through the past couple of days of coming off adderall. Especially at work. I get through my shifts at my own pace and am aware how my focus gets easily distracted. I would say "hard work" is being true to yourself and asking "did I get shit done today?" because I ask myself that at the end of every day. It does feel great when I can pat myself on the back and honestly say "yes. I did." also, thanks for informing me on the pomodoro technique! It's pretty cool to look into when wanting to improve your productivity. Thanks for signing on to the site. Honestly, it's the only thing keeping me going during these tough times. I check it more than I check my facebook at this point. I understand how being stuck in adderall mentality can get the best of you but just remember to be easy on yourself and take every task and moment as they come and stay mindful. That's what I've been doing. I've been yawning more than ever now at work and fighting myself to get coffee at 7pm (if I have coffee after 3pm I have horrible anxiety at night), but I just tell myself to embrace the comedown because adderall is not the answer anymore. Thanks for you answer again, and thanks for the congratulations!
  21. what do you consider "hard work"?

    I am doing so. Thanks for the wise words Frank B. I'm sorry you're in a bad relationship, I understand how it can be a setback at times. But at least you are aware of it. You said how it's been a year now that you've been sober. Somehow, that calms me because my crazy brain wants to fast forward through this recovery period so I can be back to normal. I guess no one ever reaches normal again and the beauty of recovery is accepting that. When I was walking dogs today sober- not on adderall, I kept on finding myself sighing because I was tired or irritated because I wasn't energized enough to handle them (they were big dogs). I reminded myself to just breathe and embrace those tough times because I'm going to face them regardless. I laid on my couch when I got home and received a text about an tv audition I had applied for yesterday (while on adderall) saying they wanted to see me in about 45 minutes. I got dressed quick went and auditioned. Not on adderall, extremely nervous but kept my cool. It actually went really well and I'm actually really proud of myself. I had natural energy flowing through me after the whole thing. It's nice to know what truly energizes a persons body and in this case it could have just been, being in front of a camera, working on set or with production. None of my friends truly understand what I'm facing. I can not thank this website enough for being here at this time.
  22. man, this website

    Wow invisibleyellow, your post touched me. I will look into meth side effects which Im sure won't be hard to find. Congrats for being off it for 9 months. You seem to have a good understanding and perspective about quitting. I'm am scared to relapse. I feel like taking adderall has affected me greatly. I don't just call myself "sadderall" for nothing. I am also taking lexapro to deal with the anxiety and depression adderall gives me. Which is why I just need to stop taking it. It's bad side-effects outweighs the good for me. I would love to be off of both of them eventually. Last night I was looking up videos on youtube talking about existentialism. I did feel a little better. I'm in a weird place in life and I think adderall has gotten me here. This website honestly has gotten me through the past couple of days. Thank you so much for being here.
  23. man, this website

    has gotten me through the past month. the community here is one the most honest and genuine ive see on the internet. I did my time just looking through the website for a couple of days and finally decided to make an account bc I too, have a voice. support is the best thing to give and receive. I've been taking adderall for a year and a half. I was prescribed 40 mg a day. I took it mainly because I started university and never felt academically competent enough to other students. I was taking it and staying up all night doing home work. which was absurd. I was delusional to the fact that I was completely unorganized. I thought the adderall would fix everything. it was a big part of why my relationship with family members and some friends were ruined. always tweaked out and not being able to be mindful of my thoughts and expression. I decided to take a break from school for mental health reasons bc of adderall and I am coming to terms with how I never had a problem with school. I was just dependent on the adderall way too much. I realized I wanted to lower my dose and eventually quit when I had no other choice but to. got my prescription late, didn't have adderall for almost two weeks. usually I would ask my friend to spot me some but I decided to stay away. luckily I had the time to recover from not taking it. I noticed my body so fatigued- but I got deeper sleep. my social skills weren't as excellent- but I was mindful of deep conversations. I wasn't as focused and tasks were hard to finish- but my mind wasn't racing and I didn't feel anxious. I went to my psychiatrist yesterday and told him i want to cut my dose in half. so that being 20mg a day. I then decided to start slow. yesterday I took 10mg for the first time in two weeks. I got so much done within the first 3 hrs. I had energy and my mind was focused- but my mouth was dry and I felt my head hurt a bit. I took the other 10mg about 3hrs later- I shouldn't have. it was pointless. I didn't need it and it wasn't worth it. all night I was restless. i went out with a friend and I was coming off rude. my face stiff, my thoughts were a thousand places at once. I couldn't focus on one point, I was talking so much and interrupting. until I had to apologize to my friend "I'm sorry, I started taking adderall again and my mind is everywhere. so my emotions are x10 right now." he chuckled and said I was being fine. was I? or was I just being obsessive about it? I don't know. it's the next day afternoon and I still feel the 20mg in my system. I tried to take a nap (which had been really easy to do those two sober weeks) and I could not. I stayed in bed lying there on my phone. does anyone know how long adderall stays in someone's system? just asking for scale. what I'm getting at is- I am in a place where the side effects are driving me to be a different person. I liked who I was for those two weeks. I was myself- content, funny, and witty. but not taking adderall anymore scares me. I feel like I'll fall into endless fatigue and depression) Any advise on my situation? thx you all so much for being here
  24. what do you consider "hard work"?

    I work retail and do creative work - photography. Unfortunately I am in the midst of trying to find full-time job which seems even more difficult now that I won't have the energy. Or maybe, it's a good thing since I will offer employers my true self (non-adderall.) My photography skills can pay well if I just put in the effort and creative drive. I dropped out of photography school and feel completely depressed about it. I guess thats why I put off the effort into pursuing it anymore. I should stop that. I also walk dogs for extra cash which is helpful while coming off adderall because it gets me out and about and moving. Only thing is, it's so easy to put off being active and walking dogs.
  25. man, this website

    thank you invisibleyellow. your support is much appreciated. I only have 10mg left and am probably just going to take 5mg tomorrow and another 5mg the next day. I have a couple of creative projects coming up and I think this will be one of my first challenges off adderall. I hate being tired or yawning. I know its going to happen. Any advice of preventing it?