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One Word Status Update


JustinW

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Thanks Justin. My new life is pretty cool its a lot more Springsteen and Beatles and a lot less Kayne and Dubstep. I'm making ends meet as a freelancer running my own business and I'm doing some really great work. Check out this site I've been working on http://goo.gl/0EUEAf . I am doing some of the best work I've done in years, I'm launching new sites working my ass off and loving the struggle. I just get stuck on what once was when I should focus on what could be. I have to remind myself that I am talented even when my stupid form code isn't working. 

:cool:

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ZK,

Working through some of those emotions ia a big part of the recovery process, a necessary part of letting go of the past and embracing your future without addiction.  Might help to make a list of those emotions when they come up, who you were with, what your doing and how you dealt with them.  You tackled a bunch of them in that short post, all the way back to why and how you started using in the first place. 

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Zerokewl,

It's tough running into old using "buddies"/ drug dealers. It represents a whole different life we once lived....a person we no longer know. That's how it was for me. When it happened to me a year ago or so, I HATED that I was jealous she was tweaking (I grew to truly dislike this girl anyway), but at the time it was my natural response of a recovering adderall addict. When I took more time to reflect on the situation, I realized how glad I was I was no longer in that life. I agree that working through these emotions is a huge part of the recovery process. You'll learn a lot about your recovery and yourself. This is a good place to vent for sure!!

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Yeah ZK, that's tough.  Working through those old relationships is pretty complicated and triggery.  

 

I got an accidental text from a former adderall buddy that said, "Hope the alcohol wears off before the adderall kicks in! Happy Friday!"   I was furious.   And made that much clear and asked that the person never text me about adderall again, because I quit and it's a struggle every day.   But to be honest, it was mostly jealousy.   I was extremely jealous of this person's "new" adderall buddy.  And I was SO JEALOUS that I was/am no longer the person who could be partying by night, taking adderall by day.  

 

In the end, I was jealous over NOTHING.  It helps to remember that we are better off now no matter what.  I DO NOT WANT to be filling my body with toxic poisons constantly, alcohol by night adderall by day.   And anyways, this same friend also said she wished she knew me better now that I'm clean.  Because I AM better now.  And so are you ZK, and so are we all.  

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