ashley6

I tried Buspar for like a week, and I personally hated it. I just felt really sick on it, so I quit. I can't attest to whether it works or not, since I quit so soon, but I, too, read about people not having a lot of success. My depression and anxiety have been awful. I don't like the idea of being medicated either, but I've tried to do what I know how myself, and it hasn't calmed me down. I started Wellbutrin along with my Lexapro and klonopin two days ago. I hate to be on 3 different medications, but I haven't been functioning in life. For all you newbies on here. I don't want to scare you and think that you'll all suffer from anxiety and depression. I'm 15 months clean, so I'm realizing these are the issues I was using adderall to mask, and it was a horrible decision. How long have you been off of adderall? I really hope you start feeling some relief. I will keep you posted.

Just did 5.5 miles on the treadmill, but I think only about 3.5-4 was running. Rough today. Keep it up you two. I will hit 12 this week!!!

MFA, My dear friend, I'm so glad to hear from you. I was getting really concerned. Thanks for sharing, and I will bet the challenges you're facing will get better in time. I need you to stay around the boards more often....for selfish reasons. You are our voice of reason and wisdom around hard. Hugs!

InRecovery, I just got so sick of being down and lethargic. I KNOW this is why I got hooked on adderall. I decided I needed to be proactive because I've been pretty bad. I sometimes think mental health is something that gets pushed by the wayside for me. Anyway, I started Wellbutrin today along with Lexapro that I'm already on. I don't particularly like being on medication, but I truly believe a lot of the anxiety and depression are genetic. I'll keep you all posted! I'm going to the gym tomorrow. In Recovery, Good job hunting a gym down....true dedication! And Occasional, very impressed with you as well. Keep it up!

I'm sorry you're having a hard day. I remember those days being so frequent when I was quitting. It's completely natural to feel like this, but I know that doesn't ease your pain. I looked at it like this. If I ever went back to adderall, I'd be trying up to clean up a mess that I let adderall create in my life.....with adderall. It isn't logical, so that's when it's really important not to romanticize it. Try your best to focus on the here and now, a day at a time, because these feelings will pass. They will....maybe not immediately, but they will. Stay strong and congratulations on 21 days!

Wow, thanks for sharing this. Quite powerful!

Good job you two!! I I did 5.5 total today. I think I ran 4-4.5 of it. So I'm about 9.5 or 10. I can't imagine running out in this heat! I've been fighting some hard core depression the past couple weeks, and the gym is the last thing I want to do, but it's the best place for me to be! I'm glad we have our club to motivate me.

Ok, spent 7 miles on the treadmill, and I'd say I walked about a mile or mile and a half....sooo 5.5 miles

Congratulations on 24 days. What an accomplishment, especially after 12 years! Keep it up, Jon!!!

Welcome to the forums. It sounds like you've come to the realization that this isn't working for you. You recognize the toll it's taken on your health in all aspects: especially mentally and physically. I never snorted adderall, but I did abuse very high dosages...up to about 120 mgs a day. I quit 15 months ago, and I was in the darkest of places when I quit. I realized something had to change because I was losing my relationships, risking the chance of getting caught buying pills illegally. I was a mess emotionally and looked sickly. It's no way to live, but it's scary trying to even figure out how to live life again without adderall. Let me just tell you there is hope. Do you have a support system in place? Have you ever been treated for your issues with weight? It sounds like you understand everything you've lost by abusing. As horrible as it feels, I do look at it as the gift of desperation. Feeling this way is what can lead you to make strides to change your life and get off of this roller coaster ride. I just want to tell there is hope as hopeless at it feels. Stay close to these forums because they truly can be a lifeline.

Very nice occasional! I've done no running this week yet....ugh. I better hop on it! I'll report back. Great Greg!

It sounds like an episode of PAWS to me. The bad news: it's terrible. The good news: it'll pass, and you'll feel yourself again. You've made some big strides with the routine you've established since you quit. Just know that it'll pass, and it sounds like you're doing great otherwise....read up on PAWS. For some reason for me, when I was/am going through PAWS understanding what I'm experiencing made it more tolerable.

It's interesting that I used to call it addy back then, but now I hate that name for it. It feels like a loving nickname, and it doesn't deserve it

Absolutely. I'm no longer on adderall, but you bring up a good point. I started using it for school work, then chores....then later down the road I'd pop adderall in the bathroom of movie theaters, to wake up, when I was bored, when I was alone, when I was with friends, family....and the list goes on. Then my body started needing high doses just to not feel like crap. Are you wanting to quit? Have you seen the evil flip that happens when adderall turns on you? Please share more and welcome to the forums.

Got 3.5 in tonight. Did like 5.5 but walked 2, so I'm at 9.5 for the week.

I read this article through SMART recovery, which I know LilTex is involved in. I think we knew this stuff already, but it was good, so I thought I'd share. http://blog.smartrecovery.org/2012/12/26/benefits-of-exercise-in-addiction-recovery/

No, still at 6.,I guess I need to go tomorrow. I like my weeks starting on Monday-Sunday, just because of my work schedule. So I will have it done by Sunday! And good job, InRecovery. Occasional, hope everything is ok.

Heather, It'll get better. You've done it before, so you know that. Keep it up!

I think everyone's different, because I wanted to eat everything in sight when I first quit. I think our bodies just react differently and withdrawal varies from person to person. I do remember I hated the feeling of being full, because it was foreign to me on adderall.

Yes, it gets soooo much better after quitting. I did fail a class because I was so anxious (now I believe it was paranoia) because I couldn't function well in public. It got so terrible the last two years, I didn't want to go anywhere. Fast forward to now...it is SO much better. I still get social anxiety here and there, but I'm more confident and comfortable in my own skin, and a lot of that stuff (like trying to get your hair perfect) just fades away. That's my experience anyway. Also, I began to believe those awful fears and anxiety were just a part of me...when it was the adderall exacerbating it. For someone who has social anxiety already, stimulants are a bad deal....this is my opinion. Hope it helps!

Ok so you played with fire, and unfortunately shown yourself that it will be an option for you if you have a doctor willing to prescribe. Good for you for flushing the rest. I don't believe I couldn't stopped with a Rx in hand. I had dealers, so it made it even more complicated. If you're truly ready to quit, of course there's always unsure feelings of fear and what if's, but it sounds like you are ready to be done. When I told my doctor I should not be prescribed, I was crying a lot. I will never forget the look on his face. I was scared out of my mind, but my dance couldn't go on with adderall anymore. I'm only telling you my experience because I know if I could do it, I couldn't imagine my life without adderall, than I know you can too. It might not be a relief immediately, but in time, it will. You can do this.

That's crazy. We need you here! And both times I've seen "Greg" I thought we had a newbie for our club. Ha. Good work, InRecovery. My body hates me right now, but it's worth it! Now to get to planks or push ups and sit-ups this week.

Findingfreedom, Living in that cycle is just plain exhausting. I would say a lot of what you're thinking and feeling is the adderall making you feel that way. I was such a negative downer when using, but I thought I needed it to be happy...oh the irony. Whole you're abusing, the adderall is controlling you, not you controlling the adderall. Quitting, as hard and scary as it may be, is the only way to find freedom again....you're in adderall's hands right now, but you don't have to be. Hang in there!

Just got done running 6 miles at the gym!

My opinion is having a doctor willing to prescribe you is risky. That's why a lot of us got ourselves cut off from our doctors in one way or another. I just say set yourself up for success as much as possible....and that would be a step in the right direction.