lunax

Well to clarify I am not looking to get high on Wellbutrin. I have suffered from depression since I was a kid so what I meant by not feeling the effect is that I am still experiencing the same level of depression that I would have without medication.

I started taking wellbutrin a few months ago at a low dose of 100mg/day. I recently had my doctor up my dose to 200mg/day because I really wasn’t feeling the effect of the 100mg. Plus I figured if I increased the dose I would feel less of a need to take adderall again. Anwyay, yesterday I noticed that my eyes looked red and glassy kinda like when I was taking/abusing adderall (same thing happening today). I also felt a little anxious/shaky which I thought was due to the tea I was drinking but in retrospect I think this could also be due to the higher dose of wellbutrin. Has anyone had a similar experience on Wellbutrin? Or has anyone developed an dependency/addiction to Wellbutrin? If so, please share.

I can't offer expert advise on quitting as I have relapsed more times than I can count. But I have "quit" many times and for long periods of time and Cassie is right...there is no such thing as weaning yourself off adderall when you're addicted to it. You can either flush or finish off your supply and take it from there. What I can say is that although I have always felt like shit during the first few weeks of quitting, this feeling is not nearly as bad as the feeling you get after an adderall binge. I haven't taken it in 15 days and I'm already feeling a lot better. I have some energy, enough to get me through a busy work day. I'm sleeping better and starting to appreciate the little things like the feeling of the fall air on my skin. Last night I went to dinner with a friend who I hadn't seen in a while and who doesn't even know I take adderall, and she said "wow you look alive today, something is different about u" and she is absolutely right. Consider getting rid of them and give the quit a try.

I've taken beta blockers once or twice. Last year I received an award which was presented to me at a conference with over 2,000 people...I thought for sure I would pass out on stage while giving my speech. The beta blocker definitely helped calm me down, my heart wasn't racing out of my chest and I was actually able to breathe. My friend also takes them to prevent herself from breaking out in hives when she has to speak in front of others. I would recommend you speak to a doctor about it and make sure you're in good health before taking them.

You're doing great freedom! THANK YOU, for being so positive and motivated in doing this thing...it's contagious! Day 15...I guess I'm 1/2 way through OUR challenge

That was a very inspiring post Liltex. TY

Day 12 I'm feeling good. Wish I could stop eating but otherwise looking fwd to hitting the gym this week. Need to see my doc soon to refill antidepressants which is making me a little anxious. I'm thinking of calling ahead and letting her receptionist know that I will not be refilling my adderal rx because I know if I get a script it won't be good. Just taking it day by day. How r u Freedom?

Day 12 I'm feeling good. Wish I could stop eating but otherwise looking fwd to hitting the gym this week. Need to see my doc soon to refill antidepressants which is making me a little anxious. I'm thinking of calling ahead and letting her receptionist know that I will not be refilling my adderal rx because I know if I get a script it won't be good. Just taking it day by day. How r u Freedom?

I developed really bad OCD when I first began abusing adderall. For example I keep a notebook of things to do and at one point I use to erase and rewrite the same exact things just to make it look neater....to no one other than myself! This kind of stuff doesn't happen when I'm off adderall so maybe now that you're taking a break you can assess whether your OCD is related to your meds.

I havent taken any in 8 days. I am knee deep in wedding planning right now and I'm forcing myself to do it without adderall because I keep thinking about all of the supportive things that people have said to me on here. I am just going to take it day by day but your 30 day challenge idea has been stuck in my head...so thank you.

I like

I recently came out to my fiancé and best friend. Much to my surprise they have been supportive, understanding, and are trying to help me deal with this. Please tell her...It will be freeing for you and a step in the right direction. Keep us posted.

Do u know anyone who has died from an adderall overdose? Do u kniw anyone who Has caused major damage to his/organs What's the most you or someone know has taken? I'm just curious Lunax

Cassie the last thing u said... stuck with me all day! Especially while i slaved over writing my reports which I know damn well will sound like a giant bowl of word salad in the morning. And had little to know interaction with anyone...including my dog. None of that seemed worth the excessive pill popping and solitude I experienced. Life would be so much worse if I ruined this relationship. Of course he's not perfect but for me he very close to it. We are 4 mths from walking down the isle and Lately I've been experiencing a lot of wedding jitters mostly because I worry about being a shitty wife, not being able to reproduce, or turning into a junky mom.

I am abusing but not just for fun. Ive been working on a huge project which I am presenting on Thursday. I'm under a lot of pressure which in turn has led me to take one after the other after the other after the other. I told her about it. She's being gentle and appreciates my honesty. She is concerned but I'm not sure she knows what to do. Perhaps I need to guide her a bit more. I also mentioned it to my therapist during the last 3 seconds of our session and I have a feeling she will be threatening to call the doctor that prescribes to me and tell her to cut me off. (Maybe this is wishful thinking I don't know.) As for my fiance I haven't told him. He just doesn't get it or doesn't want to get it. Like I could turn around and say "remember when i told i was addicted to adderall? Well the doctor says this is normal and I'm fine"...and he would believe it. His father was an alcoholic so maybe its easier for him to pretend that he's not marrying an addict. I'm tired, I'm drained, I'm dehydrated, i want to stop.

I'm so tired of this. It's killing me.

Lets set up a time

Nice!

Thanks Ashley, you just made me feel a little better. Adderall definitely makes me miserable but also satisfies me in many ways. I have such a love hate relationship with it… it’s like an abusive boyfriend that I can’t get away from. This has been the busiest year of my life and it doesn’t seem it will get any easier anytime soon. But on the other hand I don’t want to keep using this as an excuse because for all I know things might be just as hard if not harder next year. It makes me feel really scared and anxious to ask my doctor to stop prescribing but I know it will have to come to this. Thanks for hearing me out.

I stopped taking it for two weeks. I started feeling a little better, even went to the gym which I hadn't done in a while and was really starting to believe that I could do this...I could quit taking adderall. But once I started to fall behind on my list of things to do I panicked and gave in again. Now I'm back to square one...taking more than I should be taking and feeling like complete shit. I have come to terms with the fact that i am addict...now what?

I'll chat with u

Why doesn't anyone use it?

Thank you

Thanks for your responses. I've spent the last few weeks reading through all of the posts on here which has been incredibly helpful and comforting to me. I was afraid to post this because i don't want people to stop talking to me nor do i want to trigger anyone to use. It was a very difficult decision to take it again. In all honesty i can't explain how sad it made me feel to take that first one. The fucked up thing is that just one little pill was enough to awaken this beast inside of me which instantly made me want to start abusing it. i wish I could control this urge because I genuinely have a hard time concentrating and getting motivated. I have a very demanding job and to top it off am planning a wedding and going through the process of buying my first home. I know this sounds like a bunch of fluff but I just can't afford to fall behind on this stuff which is why I started taking it again. I recently told my fiancé and best friend that I was abusing my meds. (This was after i finished off a months supply in two weeks and ended up in the emergency room with kidney pain). I made them both aware of the fact that I am back on adderall now and have asked them to check in with me periodically. I am going to do my best to take my prescribed dose (30mgs per day) and swore to both of them that I would let them know if I start getting out of control. I don't really trust myself to do this but I think that making them aware of my problem has been a step in the right direction.

at the pharmacy picking up a prescription because I am drowning in my work. I have such mixed emotions about this. I've been happier these passed two weeks but I cannot afford to fall behind this way.