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Cool!!!! I didn't doubt you weren't doing well AT ALL!!! But just wanted you to know I was thinking about you and you work & school load. Plus day to day stuff... haha. You mentioned a vacation soon... Is it a "working" vacation or will you get a chance to kick back and RELAX any.

How is your school work going?

Sweetcarolinee I can't remember exactly what thread you posted it on or exactly how you said it. (My memory is awful - not sure if is because of adderall or my age or the combination) ANYWAY... while I am thinking about it before I forget I have been meaning to tell you- that you gave an illustration about being on adderall was like living in a snow globe. And WOW I thought, for myself, that was an excellent way to describe/think/visualize it. again I will have to go find exactly how you said it etc. But just wanted you to know that I really connected and could relate to that and thanks for sharing.

Lucky I am super glad you found a therapist!!! You already sound in better spirits!!! when is your appointment? You knight have said I need to go back and check.

You are ROCKING right along sweetcarlinee!!!! Hip Hip Hooray!!!

Hey lucky I have been thinking about you!!!!! I am so glad you are feeling better!!!! I will for sure check out article later. Just wanted to say hello real quick I will be back on later. again I am thinking about you and sending positive vibes your way!!!!

Oooops my bad I made a mistake in a post I made earlier but I have already corrected in post above but I didn't realize I had unintentionally left out weighting4better and wanted to be sure you knew that I really appreciate you starting this topic!!!!

WOW!!! @weighting4better I LOVE this post!!! Weighting4better and Cassie already your couple of post have motivated me. Unfortunately I don't have any answers but did look up and forward the roomba site to my husband. He too has been understanding... I knew that gaining weight was going to be another one of the negative side effects of quitting. And gosh have I... but I have really tried not to dwell on that or anything else that I can't to which is still much everything. Again great idea about cooking big meals and freezing them. Starting tomorrow I said I was going to start making healthy meals for myself and my family I have a senior that will be going off to college soon and that boy is so skinny. So gosh thank you thank thank you for just those couple of tips. My brain still seems to be in this fog... BUT I do feel like it is getting better. Just here in the past few days. So geez again I still feel kinda guilty of ALWAYS taking advise but not able to really give ANY tips yet. I don't know MAYBE I will be able to do that soon. ok I am not going to focus on that - I am just going to be THANKFUL I SAW YOUR POST this morning!!!

@sweetcaroline- CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! I had no doubt that you wouldn't make it! I am still amazed by the amount of energy you have and you have inspired me by you positive outlook and the way you encourage others!!!! I second your "woot woot"!!!! again congrats!! @luckyducky gosh since the last time we chatted it looks like you have had a rough time, but it seems like you make it through. I can understand at times it is very difficult to keep up with all the kids stuff and your house stuff... etc. plus gosh with your son you have the added pressure of making sure everything stays orderly. Maybe instead of the house being a trigger since you have pretty much have gotten caught up. I am sure that has to also make you feel better to look around and not see the clutter. And i am GLAD you are seeking outside help. Because WOW you have a lot on your plate!!! I hope you are able to find a someone one soon. But in the mean time good for for seeking support where you can find it. On here and at your church. you know you can send me a message anytime you need to vent. (((((HUGS)))) @jaymeyer good for you keep up the good work!

GOSH!!!! THANK YOU guys soooo much!!!!! EVERYTHING each of you said made so much sense and gave me a new way to look at how I am feeling and what I am going through. I started to delete my post yesterday because I felt so silly and I hate complaining especially when I know that my situation could be so much worse. And really oh my gosh not that I would wish this on my worst enemy - but for the first 6 months I was I alone (I had my husband and my 2 sons that were being supportive) but NO ONE that REALLY UNDERSTOOD EXACTLY what I was feeling or thinking. And from the day I found this site I just can't believe it. EVERYONE is so nice, so helpful and supportive. It is truly a Godsent. Today I think I am in a better place thanks to you guys, I am still crying like a baby. But today instead of crying out of frustration I am crying because I don't know, just because I am not alone anymore. Also I do have depression. And my husband, who is a physician, but not a psychiatrist. Has been telling me I need to call my psychiatrist, the same one that I got adderall from, but I did confess to him that I was abusing it and had also found other ways to access it as well. I was so scared to tell him I had not been truthful, he is such a good doctor and so nice, I was afraid he would not see me anymore and we go way back. And I would NEVER feel comfortable seeing ANYONE else therefore my depression and anxiety would not be treated. So I didn't know if I should tell him- then my son was like mom he is a PSYCHIATRIST I promise you this is not the "craziest" thing he has ever heard and he was right. wow I really lost my train of thought there and forget where I was going sorry.... Oh calling my doctor today because he thinks I am having a major depressive episode. Because I had been doing a little better I think. Anyway again I can not thank you guys enough and do feel guilty because I am not being very supportive to any of you right now... But I promise if I can just over this whatever the hell is wrong with me lately I will.

occasional01 - thanks for responding. And I think I feel somewhat better after just venting my frustration. But the thing is I quit like 7 months ago. I should be further along right? Idk when I quit I was taking about 200 mg a day well for about 2-3 weeks then crashing for a week. Idk something crazy like that. And I took adderall for around 15 years but was on that high dose probably for about the last 6 or 7 years. So I don't know if it has anything to do with the amount or how long I had been taken adderall that would make recovering longer. but I do appreciate you taking the time to answer and I welcome any suggestions.

WOW!!! Thanks for sharing your story I just had to say I thought it was really ironic that I have had that quote from Winston Churchhill on my iPhone to add to my signture for over a week now but didn't know how but justin, from this forum explained it to me a few days ago and I finally got around to it this morning. Anyway... Again that is quite an amazing story you have... I now feel kinda silly for posting about my little pity party I was throwing for myself earlier just because I was not able to get much accomplished/lack of motivation/extreme fatigue I even started to go deleted my post after reading your story because I kinda have a different perspective now. I am very sorry for your loss. But I wish you and your beautiful fiancé the very best of wishes!!! Also when re-reading your story I also noticed that the other quote I had saved on my iPhone was A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step- by LaoTzu and you said something very similar to that quote as well. I just think that is weird. A good weird but weird. Lol Because out of all the quotes I could have picked idk...I almost want to send you a picture or something from my yellow pad on my iPhone that has the date I put in there. Lol.

So it is Wednesday again.... How is it going?

I think I will try the Pomodoro Technique that you guys have mentioned. Idk I am feeling very frustrated and am getting so upset it doesn't seem like I am making ANY progress. IDK I CAN'T even write a post about it because idk it's like I am stuck. Sorry I don't mean to be such a downer but I am so bummed out right now! Sweetcarolinee good for you that's GREAT you have almost made your 30 day challenge!!!! I am so impressed that you ran 5 miles!!!!! I will be honest there are days where I have a hard time getting out of bed, without adderall. Much less getting much done. I still think about adderall ALOT!!! Not tempted to use... But it seems to always be in the back of my mind.... If I had adderall I could knock this out. Idk ok enough of my pity party - sorry!!!! It has just been one of those days where I wonder if I will ever be "normal" again.

Good for you lucky!!!! I don't really beat myself up about it because at this point it wouldn't do myself or the boys any good. I mean I WAS THERE physically. I NEVER missed a football game, soccer game, a school function, home everyday when they got home from school, etc. but I WASN't REALLY THERE because my mind was going a thousand miles a hour with all these random ideas of things I thought I HAD to do. When really none of those things were really that important. But I couldn't see that, at the time. And my boys or my husband or not resentful or angry with me either, they are being very supportive and glad that I finally recognized myself that I had a problem.

Congrats sweetcarolinee!!!! you seem to be rockin right along!!!!! You got this!!!!!

Lucky I am very proud and I know you are proud of yourself for not giving into temptation. Idk what advice others would give. But I know for myself. I CAN NOT have access to it! Or I could and would easily justify using. There would ALWAYS be a project that needed to be finished... a deadline I had to meet... Housework that had to be done... the list is never ending.. You said you can be VERY PERSUASIVE and can always talk a friend of yours into giving it to you....maybe you can still use being very persuasive BUT...... this time use it ahead of time to convince her NOT to give into you when you having a bad day. Does she know that you are trying to quit? To me it just seems like you are making it more difficult on yourself by keeping such a easy and convenient way to get your hands on it. I know for myself again the temptation would be to GREAT!!! And my mind would ALWAYS JUSTIFY IT!!! and I also know I would never be able to stop at taking just a few either.. I realize everyone is different. I just want to help encourage you to quit if that's what you want to do... Sounds like you had a good day... anytime I get to go to target that's a good day. lol

You said you had been taking adderall for 5 years- how much were you taking?

Sweet Caroline - you got this!!!! Lucky- glad you feel better! Hope you have a great day with the kiddos!!

sorry to hear that... Hope you feel better soon!!!

I will FOR SURE have to check it out!!!! Desperate for any suggestions or ideas at this point. Lol Thanks for the sharing!

zerokewl I never thought about it like that but that make sense... cool!

Ahhhhh that makes sense and seems to be exactly what I am experiencing.

Good Luck Jay!!!! It sounds to me like you are determined to meet this new baby of yours adderall free and I BELIEVE you can do it!!! Even though my 2 sons are much much older (17 and 19) they are the reason I quit and have been able to remain off adderall for the past 7 months. And I also knew the only way for me to quit would be "cold turkey". When I decided to quit I told my sons even before I told my husband and I gave them my remaining two scripts and we ripped them up together. There was a time, where I would have NEVER EVER IMAGINED ripping up 2 unused scripts. And even though I have experienced extreme fatigue, lack of motivation, weight gain, etc. I have ALSO had the experience of laughing and connecting and just being "present" not only physically but mentally with my 2 sons. My husband and both my sons say they can hardly remember me laughing the way I do now. Again I am cheering for you!!!!!

I was wondering what PAWS was I had saw were several people had mentioned it before but I wasn't sure and had been meaning to looking it up. WHICH I think I still will because it sounds like something I might be experiencing by like I said I don't know much about it.