quit-once

I just learned this lesson myself.

Using alcohol to treat depression is like trying to put out a fire using gasoline. Treating depression with a depressant? I suggest you get a handle on the alcohol issues because you may be simply substituting one addiction for another, and that outcome is never good. "For me I can't be social without adderall or alcohol, and staying away from both has just made me bored with life and anti-social." Please take this statement to your new therapist or an AA meeting . It will be a very good place to begin your new relationships.

This is my formula for a better life too. Diet is critical. I gave up junk food, fast food, sugar, milk, cigs and getting drunk. I grow my own veggies and eat lots of leafy greens. I have been in training with a workout program for the last three months, replacing middle age flab with muscles I didn't know I even had. My current supplement regimen consists of fish oil, L-tyrosine, Lions mane, and infrequently I take chromium picolenate, vitamin C and a B complex. Glad to hear you are doing well, ZK. It just keeps getting better - I am still noticing gains after three years, but I am still waiting for my full return of motivation and confidence.

Adderall gave me incredible patience, while it also caused me to become angry at stupid things. It gave me the ability to suppress the very anger that it caused. Probably not a very emotionally healthy solution.

If you like what you see when you look in the mirror.....YOU'VE WON the battle of self-acceptance!

This is such good advice it deserves to be quoted again. I would have told you the same thing but I didn't have the time to create such a well developed post like Occasional just did. And to add to Cassie's comment - people have to quit for themselves and their own reasons. If she is not ready to quit then your efforts to convince her to quit will be perceived as "nagging".

I learned a word from Cassie that perfectly describes your condition: Anhedonia. Apparently I can't even spell it right but what it means is the inability to experience joy or pleasure from the things in life that should be enjoyable. It is a perfectly normal side effect from quitting. Congrats on getting your life back together so quickly after quitting, and hang in there, the first year is filled with ups and downs and bouts of depression........ and boredom. Have you tried taking L-tyrosine? L-Tyrosine is still my go-to happy pill 3+years after quitting.

Nice! how do you feel?

You are most likely in very good health if your clothes fit well. When I was using, I weighed about the same as I do now, but I had more fat in the wrong places and not much muscle tone. I totally get what you are saying. I just moved into my size 33 Levis, pants that I bought about ten years ago! Never been healthier or more physically fit in my whole life and I am 51 years old.

Quitting is a process as well as an event. You are in the early stages of this process. All of us who have successfully quit have been through it and we are here to support you.

My spark comes and goes. I love it when I can feel that spark and I suddenly get motivated and start doing things. It reminds me a lot of when the speed started kicking in..... but that was a drug- induced spark. My natural sparks don't last as long or come around as reliably as those drug induced sparks. But it is really cool to experience that feeling even a few times per month without Adderall in the mix. At 3+ years, I am beginning to wonder if my motivation and enthusiasm will ever completely return too.

What would Sigmund Freud say about ADD / ADHD? If anything like his views on sexuality, he would likely say that ADD is a human behavior/condition that we all possess and each of us expresses it in different ways with different levels of intensity. I like ZK's description - that it is simply a difference of cognitive ability. I actually convinced myself and my doctor that I had this "disorder" and I needed my "meds" to deal with it. What a crock of shit.

how is it possible to fuck up rice or potatoes?

I totally agree with Occasional. Sounds like you are deep into your own Adderall Hell. If you cannot quit on your own, have you considered rehab? When I quit, I used the self-imposed "threat" of in-patient rehab if my quit didn't stick. If you want to keep your addiction a secret then you better plan your Quit and follow through with it, including dissing your doctor and stashed pills.

When you get the craving to use it again, and you will, just come back here and read your own posts. On June 17, you said you need to cut your ties to your psyche doctor. Have you done that yet? Besides the unsustainability of the addiction itself, are there any other reasons you want to quit?

Keeping a daily calorie/food journal has really helped me to maintain and not gain. I also log my daily activity level on a scale of 0-5. The data I am generating will be useful in the future as I will have established a base- line for body weight maintenance and activity. Keeping a food journal is a hassle, but I have been keeping one current for over six months now...not sure why. It also comes in handy to track my alcohol consumption and all of those empty calories that alcohol provides.

Getting rid of your stashed pills demonstrates a huge commitment to making your Quit work! Energy drinks, coffee, or caffeine pills can come in handy and keep you functional at work during the early stages of your Quit.

That was an interesting article. I can't comment on the parenting aspect but I think the differences of a medical approach to ADD is very interesting. The American approach to just about every medical problem is to throw drugs at it. Side effects? here's another drug for that. And any old doctor can prescribe every drug imaginable. I'm sure we have website members from all over the world - after all, this IS the Internet, right? But why is it that nearly ALL of the regular contributors on this web site are American? Is Adderall addiction a mostly American problem? or, is helping one's self kick their addiction by using a web site a uniquely American way of dealing with this addiction? ZK, do you see a lot of speed use in Canada?

One of the hardest parts of your Quit has already been done - the decision to quit and the commitment to yourself to make it work. Failure is not an option. But if you do fail, do you have a plan B? Have you considered an in-patient rehab program if your quit doesn't stick? Congratulations for choosing to end your addiction and taking the action to make it happen. Good Luck!

Alcohol has a LOT of calories and they are all empty. Seven calories per gram (ml) of ethanol. I never realized how many calories I got from drinking until I started keeping a calorie journal. 4 beers = 600 calories. one mixed drink with one ounce of 80 proof liquor has almost 100 calories from the alcohol alone!

Dealing with changes in body weight is a huge factor in one's recovery. It requires a higher level of self-acceptance. I timed my Quit to minimize rapid weight gain by quitting in the summer when I could be more active. Kicking Adderall and cigs at the same time caused almost 20 lbs. of weight gain by month Ten. I was back to my "using" weight by Month 15. Oddly enough, I now weigh exactly what I weighed when I quit three years ago. I had a lot of belly fat from lack of sleep and poor diet. Now, more lean muscle & clothes fit better. Great topic. I plan to start another discussion thread about the workout program I have embraced this spring: HICT (high intensity circuit training) + (power) yoga + keeping a daily food/calorie journal and a daily activity score.

I think it could mean at least three things: A fan or a member of the baseball team, Somebody who is trying to disassociate themselves from living in the American south or disavow Southern culture Or, as Justin said, someone living north of the Mason Dixon Line. I don't hear the term used very much in the Western US. Somebody who still wants to take a side in the Civil War I think the word has strong cultural connotations

Way to go, Zerokewl! And just like quitting Adderall, kicking the cigs for good requires a commitment of total abstinence, from all forms of the drug.

ZK, how is your quit smoking endeavor going? I usually found that when I tried to quit, I got sick more often, except the last time when I quit for good. I used to think that Adderall and smoking were good for my immune system, but those addictions were just lying to me to justify their continuation.

Justin,Agree 100 %. that was a great quote. I also spent inordinate amounts of time on relatively unimportant tasks, either to get them "perfect" or because I just couldn't let them go. I was always late. Late for work, late for appointments and late responding to deadlines. Normally I am an "on-timer" - I hate being too early just as bad as being late. Adderall made me late for everything, work related or not, and it didn't bother me. It was normal to be late, and whatever made me late was always more important than being on time. Adderall just changed my whole thought processes, and it took a long time for my brain to rewire itself after quitting.