quit-once

My resting pulse rate on Adderall and nicotine was consistently 110-120 BPM. After quitting both of those substances it is 50-65 BPM. I was worried that Adderall was wearing out my heart prematurely.

that's exactly how I felt during my last year of the addiction. My cognition began to improve right after quitting. Recovery is a long process.

This was the hardest thing for me to understand about recovery. I thought you had to feel sad and blue to be depressed. I researched the symptoms of depression and realized that anxiety was a common effect of being depressed. Throughout my recovery, I have become depressed a few times per year, usually lasting a week or two, but sometimes only for a few days. I had to do some deep reflecting to realize that this was not merely a symptom of recovery, but something I have experienced my entire life. Fortunately, my depression is mild and it goes away on its own. I have found that L-tyrosine, vitamin D, St Johns Wort and /or fish oil usually help get me out of a slump. I noticed a plateau in my recovery around three years. Drinking excessive alcohol is not helpful for depression and especially anxiety. Depression and lack of motivation (another symptom of depression) is definitely the most common theme of amphetamine recovery.

Good Move! I live in Wyoming....so Welcome to the West!

I used it off and on for the first six years. Then daily for the last three years. Only during the last two years of the addiction did I realize it was causing problems in my life and general health.

Have you been diagnosed with Parkinsons Disease?

Wow. that's really fucked up. Perhaps her problems are deeper than just adderall? I wish you the best.

I assembled an Ikea queen sized bed (without drawers) on Adderall and it took me an afternoon. It was kinda fun. To this day that is my only Ikea experience. And I agree with @Danquit that cleaning was much better while tweaking...like I actually looked forward to cleaning shit. that's not normal.

I took it daily for the first two or three years after quitting. I still take it occasionally, especially when I wake up on the wrong side of the bed and anticipate it will might be a shitty day. It usually helps.

I suggest you read though this thread if you need more reasons to quit..... Speed is really hard on your teeth, BTW.

Welcome to the forum. I'm not sure I can answer your topic question, but I would like to respond to the rest of your post. So, the main reason you quit Adderall over a year ago was because of tolerance. I can assure you that you will be right back here at this decision place in the future because of this issue if you start taking it again. Maybe not for the first few days or weeks, but eventually you will need to consider upping the dose because it quit working for you again. Adderall works for everybody when they first start taking it, then it quits working for you, and finally it starts working against you as you increase the dosages. Then you have to quit. An adderall addiction is simply unsustainable. You can't take this drug for the rest of your life. Since you haven't abused the drug, you haven't experienced the side effects, both mental and physical, that come with the higher dosages. However, you did experience the withdrawals from the physical and mental dependencies of even a reasonably low daily dose of Adderall. Withdrawal severity and general recovery becomes increasingly challenging the longer you have used / abused Adderall. I suggest taking a fish oil supplement to see if it helps with your failing academics, or maybe find another less academic pursuit. Going back on speed just for better academic performance isn't worth it. In fact, going back on adderall for any reason just doesn't make any sense to me. You really don't need this drug in your life, and quitting and recovery just becomes more and more challenging each time you attempt it. I used, then abused this drug for a total of nine years and haven't ever considered going back on it since quitting about seven years ago. I noticed most of my improvement during the first year of recovery, but felt noteworthy gains in my well-being up to year three.

I remember this thread from several years ago: Try using the search feature in the upper right corner of this page - there are about two dozen topics or posts dealing with this issue.

Congratulations for mostly making it through the month without drinking. When I quit for a month last January, I didn't really resume my 2-3 per day drinking habit until summer began. Something about summertime that I enjoy moderate drinking. The problem is that habit continues through the other seasons unless I take a long term break. Last year, I wasn't sure how tough it would be to quit for a month, but now I am actually looking forward to it. Getting drunk is no longer appealing to me, even in a party situation. We need to be careful that the Adderall addiction is not replaced by something else (another substance).

As I was reading some of your posts last week, I grew concerned that the depression and perceived lack of progress was getting you down. The posts I remember reading were in response to other people's needs and struggles. From what I know of you- just from reading your posts on this forum, you seem like a genuine, intelligent, and unselfish person and you have provided a lot of help to our newer members over the last two years. I certainly don't think any less of you for fucking up and falling off the horse. Let's dig in to the reasons for this relapse, no matter how painful it may be. I remember reading that the depression was getting the best of you last week. It happens this time of the year. Your dad has been on your ass lately regarding work and school. There is pressure to go back to school but you might not be ready to go back yet. The job working with the public isn't satisfying you. These are just the things that I gathered from your recent posts. What else has been causing you to believe that going back on speed will give you relief or improve your life? From what I understand, the psychosis can return with a vengeance if you return to the dosages that sent you there in the first place. That should terrify you. Did you ever have any physical health problems during the later stages of your addiction? They will come back as well if you did. How long do you plan to continue this relapse, and what kind of a plan do you have to quit again? Do you have any local resources who can help you? It can get pretty lonely and uncomfortable without some local support - like a counselor or a support group who understands your struggles. Were there any lessons or tools you learned during your stint in Rehab that can help you now? Would another rehab program benefit you now? The fact that you had the courage come here and tell us about this relapse speaks volumes about your sincerity and desire to quit for good, no matter how many times it takes you to finally kick this horrid addiction. You can do this.

Hey Bluemoon- Great to hear from you and that you are doing well. There were indeed quit a few of you who quit around that time three years ago. I am especially glad to hear that Nash is doing well. If you can, post a pic of him here or send it to me in a PM, you know how I feel about GSD's. Mine is almost ten years old with arthritis, but otherwise still doing OK. Thanks for the update!

You're right, and that is a big problem. Until you 100% believe that your life will be better without adderall, it will be impossible to quit. Too late to stop? Do you plan on taking it to your grave? You're doing some good soul searching now....I hope you can find the strength to beat this addiction. It's killing you (in your own words). It sounds like you really need to quit, and that quitting is not just something you should do, but something you have to do in order to move on with your life.

That's a huge step in the right direction, congratulations. Was your DWI for Adderall or was it alcohol-related? I'm glad you were able to beat it.

I did a Dry January and it was almost life changing, although I didn't give up the weed. It changed my relationship with alcohol. I feel like doing it again this year, but not until Jan, which is technically next year. Good luck!

It is posts like yours that keep me from ever considering going back. I haven't read even ONE relapse post where someone said they were glad they relapsed, or went back to responsible usage.

That was an very well-written post and you laid out your case for using adderall very effectively. At this point in your addiction, it appears that adderall is doing good things in your life. Not once did I read about an unhealthy side effect, or any lasting damage that this drug has done to your life or your lifestyle. It appears that your biggest concern is your obsession with the drug and how it has helped you become the social person you want to be. So, my initial response and observation, is that you are just not ready to quit. You desire the quit because it is something you think that you should do, but not because it is something you really need to do at this point. Please tell me if I read it wrong. Your screen name: wired, tired and unhired suggests that you may be unhappy with the status quo. I'm not saying you need to experience a rock bottom or have bad things happen in your life in order to make the quit stick. But you have to want or need that Quit worse than most other things in your life. Especially, more than that social person you become every time you take another pill. When you do quit, I hope that some of the lessons you have learned from or while on adderall can follow you through your life beyond this drug. Why do you want to quit adderall? How will your life be better without it?

You already answered this question with the title of your own post. If you can't bring yourself to tell the Dr you are hopelessly addicted, make something up, like an awful side effect or possible allergy to adderall.

Thanks for the information, @Cheeri0 I don't even know what a reddit is, let alone a subreddit. And thank you @Mike for keeping this website going. CAPTCHA?? I don't even want to know about that one

Here's a link to the eight stages of Adderall addiction: What stage have you progressed to at this point?

This is hardly worth creating a new thread over, but I have been anticipating this moment since quitting 7 years ago. Yesterday, while searching through a drawer (the same dresser drawer I used to store pills in), I found a blue football lurking under some junk in the bottom corner. I could write an essay about the cascade of thoughts it created, ranging from 'just put it back and forget about it" to "save it for my friend who still uses" and also "fuck it, just take it now - it's only 10 mg". All within a minute. Then I remembered all of the times I have posted on here what I would do if I ever found a wayward pill: flush the fucker ASAP. So I threw it in the toilet, took a photo of the blue blob in the bowl (I have no idea why), and sent it to Hell. I guess my point for posting this is to stress how important it is to have a plan of response if you ever find it, or are offered Adderall or other stimulants. What would you do if you found a wayward pill?

Brain fog is normal. The pulsating temples might last for a while. I've never heard of that, but I had several tremors ant twitches before and after quitting. The twitches in my lower extremities lasted for years, and my tongue thrashed around my mouth for many months after quitting. Please don't let the brain fog or pulsations discourage you or cause anxiety. It will get much better the longer you are off this shit. And the doctor who said you should just go back on it...... is not somebody I would go back to.