Motivation_Follows_Action

So proud of you! I thought by the title of this post that you'd relapsed. Really happy to hear you're staying strong. Let me know how you do with that cleanse... please continue to be gentle with your body! You've punished it for a really long time...

Are you on medication? Sorry, I keep forgetting. Antidepressants can have that effect...

Thanks so much for sharing, QO. It's funny, you're on here every day helping others, giving wise and insightful commentary, practical suggestions, comical rhetoric etc. It's unusual to hear your own stories and I like it! I think it's really cool when we realize that life is actually easier and more do-able without adderall. I'm finding that myself, too. Lots of little things each day that I avoided like the plague while I was on adderall because I got so confused with the simplest mental tasks. Tomorrow I have a whole ton of financial stuff to take care of that honestly I haven't looked at in over a year. And you know what? Although it's going to take a lot of concentration and mental organization to do it, i'm not anxious, I'm just looking forward to getting it in order and having one more thing crossed off the list.

These are lovely! That reminded me, a group of owls is called a parliament of owls. More cool group names here: http://lyberty.com/encyc/articles/murder.html

Hey there somedaydreamer, how's it going? I think I haven't seen you post for a little while so wanted to check in. And I remembered something about this topic, too. I had horrible nightmares about 6 or 7 weeks in as well. I've never had even one dream about adderall or pills but the nightmares were awful and went on and off for a few weeks. Much better now, only have them about once a week. Nightmares for me always involve some kind of betrayal and emotional trauma, which means I usually wake up crying. It totally freaks my husband out, especially when I start crying in my dream... not fun!

Totally agree - I need to have something to look forward to in life! Whether that's a vacation coming up or (for me) a new job or even hitting a small goal, that's what keeps me going forward. I find when there's nothing to look forward to it is really hard to even get out of bed in the morning.

I honestly think food can be an addiction too. A much more complicated one than amphetamines, actually, because you have to eat to live. I agree with you that sugar is addicting and I am slowly trying to wean myself off it. It's hard though, there isn't as much of an incentive when it's not visibly afftecting your mental or psychological functioning to the same degree as adderall. Man I wish change wasn't so hard!!

This is fantastic, LILTEX - thank you for sharing! I hope this doesn't get lost in the forums, as it's a really helpful tool.... maybe post it in the Announcements section which tends to be a bit less active and less likely to get hidden, what do you think?

Kyle, we have fostered a really caring and supportive community here, free of judgment. Many people who come here do so because they feel like they won't get shot down by trollers or negativity, and they can be truly open about what's going on with them. It's a really special place for that very reason. Let's try to keep it that way.

Not pathetic AT ALL! It took me 3 months to get this far. You're bloody awesome you are!

Not cool, dude.

Patience is not for the impatient, as they say. Try to notice the good days if you can, and ignore the meh ones....

I stumbled across this today. Just posting because I think the topic of weight loss and adderall comes up a lot here and this is the best example I've seen in a long time of someone who's "just like me". And look at her now. So impressive. http://gokaleo.com/about-me/

Welcome to the forums, Korosei. Sounds like you've had a rough go of it and are surrounded also by adderallics which you've been strong not to cave to. Do you have access to adderall now? Have you cut off ties with your doc and asked your friends not to give any to you? Sounds like your resolve is strong now which is good but we all go through cravings at some point or other. You don't want to undo all the good work you've done! Your up/down/up/down is really familiar. When I first quit, after the first few weeks I would go a few days really irritable and depressed and then have one clear day every now and again. I would cling on to those good days as an insight in to what the future would be like, and now the reverse is true! I am still relatively early in my recovery (5 months) and from what I hear things only get better from here, so I'm looking forward to that. Final questions - how much were you on and when you say you were deteriorating day by day, what does that mean? I found being specific about what I hated about being on adderall was an important part of the recovery.

I can't walk properly today - sooo sore! I didn't run too much but did a bunch of squats and lunges... It's gonna take a while for this old gal to get back in to shape, but like everything, consistency is the key...

Never stop posting, celebrating, confirming your success! It's really great to hear about the good times as well as the struggles. Congrats and stay strong!

I can't make it tonight unfortunately but I don't imagine that will stop you... I hope some or all of the rest of you can!

ugh that sounds awful you poor thing! I hope you're not suffering for too long.... Unfort, I don't have any advice to offer for the pain killers stuff. I've never been able to tolerate pain meds myself as they make me really sick, but I do know others who really struggle to get off their addictions to pain meds. A side point: if you're going to be recovering from oral surgery, might this be a good opportunity to quit smoking????

http://www.currentconcerns.ch/index.php?id=1608

You're not crazy but the drug is definitely going to make you that way if it hasn't already. Take a look at the "8 stages of amphetamine abuse" in the Announcements tab, if you haven't already. Actually the reason I asked all those questions in my post is because I could tell from your writing that you are finding it difficult to keep a train of thought in your head and turn it in to a cohesive sentence, then paragraph, not to mention whole story. This too is a symptom of adderall - I found towards the end I couldn't even finish a thought properly before the next one intervened. I couldn't stand being in my own head. And I thought this was normal, something I would have to get used to. I'm here to tell you it is absolutely not normal, and it is not acceptable, and it can be fixed, very simply! You just have to stop taking adderall. I'm not going to tell you it's not hard, but the peace that comes with having control over your mind, mood and actions is well worth the temporary pain and exhaustion you'll feel for the next few weeks. I hope you realize that it's obvious to me (a complete stranger) that something is messing with your ability to articulate yourself. And if I'm recognizing it, then I'm pretty sure everyone else is too. Time to quit, my friend.

I've never heard this before. I like it. I am going to steal it

Aww hang in there lovely lady! You should be celebrating in your head because that's an amazing accomplishment!!! 20 days is awesome, and tomorrow it will be 3 weeks, and then 4 and so on. Please stick with it - we need you around here. I look forward to your posts and I love hearing how you are and what you're thinking and doing. It's so easy to be tempted in to that "quick fix" thinking, isn't it (about the weight loss thing). But you and I know that's not the answer. Adderall is not a diet pill. It's a mind-fucking, life-sapping psychotic pill. At some point you have to be willing to accept the body you have, or go the hard route and work out and diet like everyone else. I suspect you are not overweight, but you like to stand out in the crowd with your svelte body. Maybe just for now stop comparing yourself to others, and how you look on the oustide and focus on how you feel on the inside. Your body is healing, along with your mind. There will be time for diets and what not, but right now the only thing you need to focus on is getting through each day. I'm relying on you... you're such a strong woman and I know you can beat this horrible mental game. Stay strong!

So you have gone through 4,500 mg in less than a month? That must mean you're averaging over 100mg a day? Are you sleeping? Eating? Are you paranoid and delusional? How long have you been abusing your prescriptions? Sorry for all the questions.... I believe you can get through this (we all are trying to!) but it takes nothing but commitment, and it's the hardest thing I've ever done. YOU have to commit to this like your life depends on it. It probably does.

Yes thank you I will remind myself !

... well that conjures up scenes in my head from Trainspotting if ever anything did...