LILTEX41

Hey, sign up for Smart Recovery and come join the tool time meeting. There are open spots. I think you'll find it helpful right now. It just started and lasts an hour and a half. http://smartrecoveryforum.org/123flashchat.php

I think the issue came out March 2013. You're more than welcome btw! How are you feeling tonight?

Krax, That is such a great point! You never know what life is going to throw at you. I went to work today in such a great mood for once and was so proud of myself for being in such a happy positive place until my boss ripped my before I left. I have been working on not letting it upset me as much tonight as it normally would. I ran my 45 mins and swam 50. I had to work really hard and still working really hard on defending myself and not beating myself down like I normally do when she does this to me. She does this to all of us from time to time, but I tend to take it to personal. Anyhow, these are the types of things we have to learn how to deal with emotionally once we no longer take Adderall to distract ourselves and numb out. But again, if I was telling myself I had to always be happy then I would feel sad about not living up to my standard of being happy 100% of the time plus being upset by what she did to me. So I'd feel really down in the dumps. Instead, I think it's best if we just concentrate on one day at a time and focus on learning how to cope with our emotions when they hit in a productive manner. And now after processing all of this I do feel better! Hey, if anyone is interested there is a live Smart meeting just starting right now called Tool time. These are great meetings if anyone wants to jump in the chat room and attend. http://smartrecoveryforum.org/123flashchat.php

Whooooooooooooooooooooo hooooooooooooo!! You did it!!!! So excited for you!!!

Awe! We are in a circle together in spirit. Rise up and fly on free bird!

OMG, you need to dwell on this! On another note, I had a wonderful 6yr anniversay weekend with my fiancé. He loves the non adderall user in me so much more and so I do honestly. FAST FORWARD this week at work: You go to work tomorrow. You tell yourself, I DO NOT NEED Adderall to function. I will do whatever it takes to make it through this week and by Friday night I am going to feel like a ROCKSTAR because I SURVIVED my first week without Adderall. This will be the hardest week, BUT after I get through it, the next week will be EASIER and EASIER. I am going to be SO FREAKING PROUD of myself for going to work PILL FREE. I am NOW IN RECOVERY. I AM HEALING. I AM COURAGOUS, STRONG, POSITIVE, MOTIVATED, AND DETERMINED to WIN. I WILL OVERCOME THIS WEEK. I WILL SUCCEED. I can't wait to tell my fiancé that I DIDN'T take Adderall all week even though I wanted to. I can't wait to see the look in his eye when I share my accomplishment with him. But most importantly, I can't wait to look in the mirror on Friday night and see an Adderall free lady looking back at me. How awesome will that feel? Keep pushing on. You have made it this far!!!!! Don't give up!!! HUGS!!

Sounds like you are doing great! I wouldn't be too tough on yourself just yet. How about setting small goals for now? Like just pick one goal for the next day before you go to bed at night? Pick something really easy and enjoyable. Like, "I will go see a movie tomorrow." Then over time you can build on that. Each time you do what you set out to do, you'll feel accomplished and grow strength - NATURAL strength and it will help you feel more confident in your ability to carry out a task. I also love "chunking" tasks that feel overwhelming. Do a task for 10 minutes and then do something else. Reward yourself for doing it for 10 minutes. I'm always amazed how much I actually did when I take this approach. I usually end up doing more than I even set out to do because I make the goal small but doable and then feel inspired after I did what I was supposed to do. Anyhow, you're doing great! Keep up the good work!

You can do anything you set your mind to. I WILL break this addiction. I WILL OVERCOME. I WILL WIN this battle. I WILL NEVER GIVE UP. I WILL KEEP MOVING FORWARD. You CAN do this! Your baby needs a healthy RECOVERED enlightened happy pill free mama! You have 2 months to get clean before the baby comes. Set yourself up now while and get grounded in your recovery. Just remember that each day clean is one more day farther away from addiction. That's simply all this is going to take is time. If you go back to it, you'll have to start all over again. That's all you got to do is just let time pass and not take it. I promise you IT WILL GET EASIER. HUGS!

I def think you should plan your quit ahead of time. Plan it when you have time to sleep and have no responsibility. You CAN DO IT!!

Congratulations on 2 months! So happy for you!!

Great job everyone!!!

Awesome! So happy for you.

Per the words from my favorite pastor Joel Osteen: You are exactly where God intended you to be. He doesn't give us anymore than we can handle. You have everything you need. You are doing amazing! Do not speak words of defeat. Even if you think them do not speak them. Speak words of victory and you will overcome. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OCvF3TmohM

That is so AWESOME!!! Wow, what a great inspiration you are. LOVE hearing stories like this. There is a beautiful life drug free. Congratulations!

I LOVE THIS!!! SO PERFECT. I am so happy tonight. Pills went in the dumpster this morning. Ran 4 miles and biked 50 mins. What kind of bike do you have?

Hey! Read this article from Dr. Mercola's website called NON-DRUG TREATMENT FOR ADD/ADHD! I think it will help!!! I am on day 4 of my detox from aspartame (diet pepsi/artificial sweetners) along with taking magnesium, calcium, fish oil, and adding essential fats back to my diet. I think this is the CURE. http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2001/01/07/lendon-smith.aspx By the way, how was your bike ride? I am doing that today! No more celexa today. I'm going to chuck that bottle on my way to work and just deal with the consequences of withdrawal. Can't wait to be drug free again!

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2013/07/20/drugging-children.aspx Weaning off celexa I started two weeks ago....terrible idea. I hate all anti-d's and NEVER taking them again!

congratulations!!!! Knew you could do it!

LOVE IT! It's about time they do a study like this!

I remember still not having an appetite for the first 7 days in detox. I could eat, but it was minimal. Food just wasn't that appealing yet...YET. lol It's probably just the Adderall still in your system. Don't worry, you'll be fine soon. Yes, go running! Just do it for 5 or 10 mins if you can. Tell yourself you can run 5 and walk 5 run 5 walk 5. Even if you only do 10 mins you'll have met your goal and get those natural endorphins going again. Good job on 10 days!

So glad to hear you are feeling better and that you made an appointment with a new doctor. I think it is really important to have someone you like and feel comfortable with. I know what you mean about the exercise! Sometimes it is so hard to get motivated, but the amazing rush I get from after I do it is always way better and picks up my spirits when I get done. 1) There is that sense of accomplishment and pride that you just did something good for yourself, and 2) You get an amazing rush of natural endorphins which is better than any high. I love yoga too! It's so calming and puts me in my happy place. Anyhow, you GOT this girl! Just remember that each day the Adderall gets out of your system, you are HEALING and getting STRONGER. Hugs right back to you!

Finding Freedom, One more thing to mention. I was just in a Smart Recovery meeting and they brought up the following analogy which I thought was cool. Quitting an addiction is somewhat like breaking into a pair of really comfortable penny loafers. It's uncomfortable in the beginning for like the first 3 days. You could just choose not to wear them and avoid the discomfort, but then you'd be missing out on a great pair of awesome shoes in the long run. Override short term discomfort to achieve long term pleasure.

Awe, that is so great! See your friends saw they're real friend this weekend. So happy for you!

Evie, I did what you are doing for the first 9 months of my sobriety. Well, not exactly, but my mom and people around me kept asking if I had told my doctor I was addicted to Adderall and I kept getting pissed off that they were asking me. But really, I knew why I didn't make the call. I knew that maybe, just maybe, I could have that option still open in case I needed it. I relapsed on alcohol/pot after 9 months sobriety and I was such a mess I started contemplating calling the doctor to get my prescription refilled. Luckily, when that happened it dawned on me that I'd just been to detox 9 months prior and that I could not afford to go back on Adderall again. That was the last day I drank up until now. I called the doctor's office the next day and told them. This weekend I went back to a different doctor to get back on celexa. You know what the first thing she asked me? She says, "so you are allergic to Amphetamine tablets?" It was CRAZY, but thank GOD that was in there, because I would've been so tempted had it not. I just remember feeling so much relief after I called the doc because I knew that I was finally done for GOOD. NO GOING BACK. By the way, why are you feeling so hateful of yourself today? What's wrong?

Cat, Have you discussed all of this with your doctor? Why don't they put you bipolar medication? There has to be an anti-depressant that is safe. Do NOT give up!!! Do you hear me?? DO NOT GIVE UP!!! The Adderall is screwing you up! You don't even have it out of your system yet. They should not have you on Adderall if you have bipolar as Adderall makes the highs/lows SO MUCH WORSE. I'm pretty sure I have slight bipolar. I was diagnosed with it when I overdosed on Adderall and went to detox. However, it was mainly from overdosing that sent me into that state, but they put me on lamictal, celexa, and Seroquel. Some serious shit, but ya know what? It tranquilized me enough for the first few months that I was kinda like a happy little lamb. I was so totally out of it really, but I think I needed to be that way at that time. Please call your doctor and schedule an appointment. Send me a message if you need someone to talk to. It will be so much better down the road, but the first thing you have to do IS STOP LOSING HOPE. There is a BEAUTIFUL LIFE out there waiting for you, but you have to be gentle and kind to yourself and do the best thing for you. I PROMISE you it will get better. Get that crap out of your system and you will be on the road to RECOVERY. ((((HUGS))))