Jon

I like your etsy website, SweetCarolinee. Thanks for sharing it with us. Now, you remind me of the main character in the movie Uptown Girls, who likes to design clothes. It was a sweet movie. You would probably like it. Congratulations on day 47. You definately have fortitude and a lot of creativity!

I pledge to shovel the driveway, steps, deck, a path to the bird feeders and keep the snow off the car in between work shifts. I just ordered a 52" Extender snowbroom to help with the car. It's made for SUV's, but I think it will be great doing my car without having to pull snow back on myself with the shorter broom I have now. Good luck to everyone coping with winter hazzards this year!

Fortitude: strength and endurance in a difficult or painful situation.

You are doing a wonderful job at quitting and making a new life for youself, SweetC. I just realized it, but I love your signature quotes. I'd follow Churchhill and Rumi anywhere.

This is a great thread! There is so much wisdom here and it is all within your reach, nosleep_ox. To pick up where Ashley left off, you never know when you are going to have your Aha moment, but if you keep asking questions like "what's it really like to live life sober?" you will have it sooner rather than later. Sooner means you are curious and involved. You are activly learning about your addiction. Later means you just let the drug run your life until you come crashing into your bottom. I think that's as aweful as it sounds, and it's you life you are talking about, not some character in a movie. For me, my Aha moment came when I found this website and realized that quitting was possible. It was as simple as that. My doctor had me convinced that I could stay on Adderall for the rest of my life, but I knew from experience that it was not working out as easily as he was able to say it. I was quite sick and totally exhausted from using the drug for so long. I was tired of digging. I was ready to quit after I learned the truth on these threads. Hang around, read everything you can here. The most important thing you can do to help yourself in addiction is to take action. That can mean a lot of things; like being open, learning from others, taking suggestions. Don't wait for your bottom. Choose to quit for yourself. You deserve it!

sneekrz, Vyvance, Adderall and Ritalin are all legal forms of speed, so you are in the right forum if you are trying to stay away from perscription speed. All of us quitters are familiar with the weight gain that follows quitting speed. I believe you are right when you suspect that your metabolism has changed. There are lots of things related to metabolism that change after quitting, like hunger changes, sleep habit changes, energy changes. Be encouraged though that with time, effort and encouragement, you can overcome the obstacles, including weight gain, without taking a pill.

1/29 - 23 pushups 1/30 - 46 curls 1/31 - 5 minutes juggling 2/1 - 5.5 mile walk 2/2 - nothing (I started working 2 weeks of the night shift and it's all I can do to survive it. I probably will not be reporting out on activities next week) 2/3 - nothing 2/4 - nothing

FancyGuyCody, Your plan sounds logical, but risky. Adderall is speed. Speed is extremely addictive. The results you have today will require more pills, more dosage. Eventually, you will need X number of pills just to get out of bed and feel "normal" (not enhanced with the drug). We like to say on this site that taking Adderall is unsustainable, even at doctor prescribed dosages, including low dosages. Sooner or later the negative effects will outweigh the positive and then you will be in a tight jam. You will be addicted. All of the great feelings you experience from the drug today, will cost you ten times as much on the back end. We call it the dues you have to pay. They are collected on the back end and they are hard time dues. If you want to go into that kind of debt, know the consequences. We are all here to tell you that it isn't worth it.

Yep, It's just that casual to sentence a person to a 30 year stretch in personal prison. Thanks Cassie.

Nice work Jay. Keep going! LD - I am happy to know you are doing all you can to help yourself. I am certain that your efforts will pay off. Good job!

Welcome to the forums MeAgain. Any lead time you can afford to give yourself will help with the first few weeks of withdrawal. You know the pain of withdrawal already, so use that information in planning your quit. I don't think taking another 6 week high intensity class will be in the cards for you. You may want to time your quit differently. It would be a win/win situation if you could get your husband to be your quit buddy, in fact it may be vital to a successful quit for you. You can get back to yourself again, but honestly you already know the routine; from the bed to the couch. That struggle has to play out over a longer period of time than you are thinking and you have to surrender yourself to the process. Quitting is hard, but you can do it if you want it strongly enough. We are her to help you along the way.

Hello and welcome Anxietyattack321, You say "I hope this time I really quit." I think you are going to need a little more conviction to quitting than that. You are going to have to really want this for yourself, above all other things. I think that is the most important asset in quitting. Write some things out, post them if you want to and get a good idea of just how improtant it is for you to quit now and for all time.

I didn't know his history and the news is from out of left field somewhere. Who would have guessed? It makes addiction look universal.

Epiphany, I can chime in on needing so much sleep since I quit. It is part of the dues we owe. I know it feels terrible to have no energy, but you can create some energy by moving your body. I'm not the best example for this, but it is a proven fact, if you can muster getting started. Nice screen name.

Ruben, Alone you may not have the strength to quit, but in a community where we are all doing the same thing; facing the same challenges, the same fears, having the same doubts, you have the collective power of many people just like you! And don't forget that Adderall lies to you and steals your soul. It gives you false confidence, only to take it back from you. The dues you will owe for the short term benefits are paid on the back end when you quit. The sooner you can get away from it the better off you will be and the less dues you will owe. Invest some time in reading the articles that Mike has written. There is a wealth of information here and a wealth of support if you decide you want to give a shot to finding out who you really are away from Adderall.

Even though I don't post as often as I could in the challanges, you know I'm on your side SweetC. You are doing Great!

I use Zipfizz Energy Shots. It's loaded with B12. I use the premixed "Fruit Punch" flavor liquid. It also comes in powder form, but it's not as effective. I get mine at Costco online. It's on sale every other month. $26 for a case of 24 4 ounce bottles.

Congratulations Justin! It's a big date for you. It must feel like you are flying! Pun intended. I am happy to have shared part of your journey with you. You made a nice comeback from your brief relapse and I believe you are home to stay now. Keep shining the light for us who come behind you.

Congratulations Z!!!! The one word status update is a nice spot to place an 8 month anniversary. I've watched you transform in the last few months. True inspiration! Thank you for your service too.

Don't keep us in suspense too long LD. Please, let us know what your doctor says. I have never heard about it. If it can increase energy, I'm all in.

I'm rooting for you Jay. You have a lot on your plate to be going through this, but when you make it, you will be happy that you persevered.

Ahh, Aviator terminology! So your Check flight (after which you can fly solo) is scheduled for Monday, weather permitting. You have prepared a long time for this and I know you can do it! Go Justin!!!

One way or the other, you will make this deadline, even if it means an extension.

Ashley and Occasional, you gave me the bravery to come clean about a physical condition I had while taking Adderall because it is embarrassing, but it is definitely a part of my story. I walked around for 3 years with pain in my testicles. I thought it was related to Lyme’s disease and the people in that support group said that it was a problem they have heard before. One thing I put together was that when I took a higher dose of Adderall, the pain got worse. When I took less, I got some relief from the pain. I chose to believe that it was Lyme’s disease rather than my secret little pill. I went to four urologists until I came across one saying it was testicular torsion: the testicle becomes twisted in the sac and can't get untwisted. Surgery was required to fix it. I was at the point of tears every day with the pain and I agreed to have the surgery. Talk about scary!!! The end of the story is that the surgery worked 100%. No more pain after a few months of healing. Then shortly after joining this forum, I researched it on the Web and guess what? There are quite a few stories in other forums that link testicular torsion with Adderall. No one else here (men of course)experienced this? Check out this link if you would like to hear other stories on this subject. http://forums.webmd.com/3/add-and-adhd-exchange/forum/601/10 The real kicker is that I continued to use Adderall for another 9 years! May as well edit in all the physical symptoms while I'm here: Frequent urination. It was difficult to start the flow and it was somewhat painful. Sexual dysfunction. I had Raynaud's syndrome (fingers were purple and cold). Clentched jaw especially during sleep. I was just about to get a bit. Creaky joints. My appetite was destroyed. Insomnia. I was having constant injuries due to pressing my body beyond it's natural limits. I was always cut and brusied. Had a penchant for activities that were very risky. This caused injury. Acne. I was skinny; beyond a healthy look. At the end I gained weight and now I am 20 pounds overweight.

Wow, that sounds exciting! Where's my camera? Did you pass everything? Congratulations!