Doge

The message is as clear as the analogy. Hope you find a solution. Let us know if we can help in any way!

one will do absolutely nothing for you but make you crave 1000 more

Start with gentle stuff, like just some yoga poses on your living room floor, core strengthening and stuff. Wall pushups. They feel so good! But yeah you will get there. That's great about your food!

Of course you shouldn't! Get rid of any possible source of it from your life. Don't go down that road please!!!!!

I'm naturally an introvert. Adderall at first made me more extroverted in the short term. In the long run once I started abusing I was back to extreme solitude and loneliness. I'd say I'm back to being pretty balanced now in comparison, but still more introverted than I was before adderall. At about my 5 month mark last year, I had a lot of friends scratched off my list, and was very very introverted by default. As for energy, hows your nutrition and exercise going? Exercising is like hitting the gas on the recovery wagon. It speeds it up a lot, and helps make you feel true joy again, even if it's in really small doses at first.

Yeah i tried one of those $300 or less machines. They are terrible. You read the specs and think "hey, still sounds a heck of a lot better than my old machine" but the industry is rigged so that you will always have to spend more if you want a decent experience. The computers that cost < 300 are just so crappy they can't even properly handle the operating system that comes installed on them. Glad you got something you like!

i remember the first time i had one, and it made me superman for a whole day (even after it wore off i was a machine, just a tired one) i remembered thinking "Holy fuck, they get a whole bottle of these things every month? They must have TONNES extra..." i had no idea how it actually works and neither do they. fuck em all, and quit. the ones who are your true friends will understand

i was the same way, bought off dealers and friends for 3 years. my friend charged me his own price, what he was paying, rounded up to the nearest dollar, but the dealer I knew took advantage of me and kept jacking up the price

our chat about full moons interfering with sleep was the first i had ever heard of the topic. i thought you were joking at first actually but then i looked into it and there's actually something to it. in fact i spoke to people at work that day and many of them said they barely got any sleep at all that night

glad to hear you had a better day, you've earned it! there will be more in the future I agree with this 100%

This sounds all too familiar to me. It sounds like you know you need to quit and have decided to do so. What's the plan, and how can we help you? Welcome to the forums! EDIT: Sorry I didn't read your post properly when I woke up this morning. I think most of the users here agree that cold turkey has been the easiest way to quit. Best to clear your schedule for a week and get ready to just hang out in bed with freezer food and snacks to munch on to try to soothe the withdrawals. The first few days are going to suck, but if you go easy on yourself and just escape into netflix land it's bearable. That being said, some people have successfully tapered, and that method has its advantages. Being a binge user myself, tapering was not an option. As soon as you feel up to it, get your body moving again (start with gentle exercise) and try to give your body nutritious foods. You can get through this for sure. Check out the articles on this site, they are great and full of helpful information and encouraging words. Post back lots to let us know how you are doing. We're all in this together!

Wow. Scary articles, it was like going through a trip down memory lane.

almost got 3 performable songs put together! next week I'm going to give them a try at a local watering hole! will post back to let you guys know how it goes!

Tinkering with electronics is incredibly mentally draining. I used to take apart Nintendo Wii's, Playstations, Xbox's etc, and solder in modchips in them for friends and stuff way back in the day. Now I just don't have the energy/focus for it. Maybe you dont want to do it now because you weren't really all that interested in it to begin with, or maybe you were but you just don't have your drive back yet. Time will tell. But if it was really something you were/are passionate about, I'm sure you will get back into in due time!

Whee made it! Have hardly thought of adderall this last month. I certainly set myself back but all my work last year was not in vein. I got it together this time for sure. I feel like as far as my laziness factor goes, I'm definitely barely at the 60 day mark. I hardly get any work done and I'm surprised I haven't been fired from my job. But psychologically, as far as cravings go (this is what I was really afraid of) I haven't had any yet, and as far as happiness, well lately I feel like I'm back where I was right before relapsing (well last few days have been good anyways, mostly because of the beautiful weather we're suddenly having). It's good that I didn't let it go on any longer than I did, it could have led to total destruction. One nice thing about being a loner during recovery, is I have cut out a lot of the people in my life who weren't really good for me. I don't mean bad influences as far as drugs go or anything, but just people that don't reciprocate friendship at all. I've pretty much cut them out of my life and I've made a couple of new friends and gotten quite close with someone who used to be just an acquaintance. Sad that I won't see them much in a few months when I move, but the little things still matter.

Can't wait until you're done the stress so you can start working on your recovery! We'll be here.

wow so you're a couple weeks away from the 5 month point!! that's so awesome! I recall a really rough patch between 4-5 where I almost felt like I was starting to feel worse than a month or so prior. Around the 7th month mark I noticed a huge improvement, and the first time where a week or so went by without even thinking about the drug. There is light at the end of the tunnel man. Just try to remember how amazing you are for quitting. btw, nice avatar.......... *switch to jesse voice* bitch!

When people say it takes years to fully recover, it's important to understand that doesn't mean you're going to feel shitty for that whole time. You're going to notice massive improvements constantly along the way. Hang on to that Sunday, because it's coming back. Next time it might last for 3 days though, then you might have another crappy week again after. But the overall trend is that things are going to be improving for you. Keep posting when you feel shitty. Also, I highly recommend getting a ticker. It's really satisfying to count the days and constantly be reminded of how close you are getting to your next milestone. It gives a tiny little bit of short term validation that our dopamine deprived brains so desperately need.

Can confirm from experience. I think I was rounding in on my tenth month clean when I managed to manipulate my way into getting my hands on some. I did 15 pills in about 12 hours. By the time they were gone I was bawling. I had been doing so well, and was on the road to happiness and threw it all my progress away in an instant. And for nothing. I pulled an all nighter so what? It wasn't even fun or productive or anything. I've actually been reading a lot of your posts Frank, I think you may have started posting here during the time I was away on my relapse and couldn't bring myself to log into this site. I really feel you man. I find your posts inspiring really. You are so honest about where you are at and your dedication to quitting comes through in your words. Whenever you are feeling like you are hating yourself just try to remember how massive of an undertaking it is to get off of two different extremely abusive substances at once. You are a winner right now. Remember that. As for your last sentence, I'm really glad you have kids then, it breaks my heart to hear you talk like that and yet on the other hand I totally understand feeling like my soul is dead inside and there is just no point. One day not too long from now you will find true happiness again, even if it starts off coming just in little small doses.

i feel like a pathetic piece of shit lately too. no wait i am one

At around 5 months I had a horrible weeklong craving that just didn't let up and I was convinced I was never going to be over adderall. Then afterwards, within a couple of months, life was full of bliss in comparison, just for being normal. I still didn't have my productivity back, but the misery had passed for a while. I now look back at on it as the calm after the storm. The worse you feel during this phase, the better its going to feel when the pendulum swings back the other way. You're still working towards equilibrium at this point. Stay strong you are doing great!

phew! amazing! i can't even seem to finish a whole mile lately

Bah, i didn't even notice this thread when I did my analysis of L-Tyrosine. Yeah it gives me headaches too unless I go exercise right away on it. For some reason I had no negative effects from 5-HTP, its my favorite supplement. It really balances me out when I'm feeling shitty, and I have zero compulsion or desire to take it when I'm feeling fine so I am not worried at all about it becoming a habit. I go though about a container (60 capsules) per year or so.

oh god those 3pm naps..... so important

yeah i still feel like that right now but only when im trying to force myself to focus on work. when it comes to doing things I enjoy, the hours still just fly by. but of course it wasn't like this during early recovery. sometimes watching TV was exhausting lol i think the biggest challenge many people face when coming off of adderall is accepting that they've let adderall convince them they had passion for something they actually hate (like whatever job it drove them to take)