AlwaysAwesome

I totally agree with your timeline so far. I am nearly at 18 months clean and it is pretty darn accurate for me, too. Sparks of life...yes.

Yay! Great job. You have been an inspiration to me in my quit. I feel the same way about the Adderall now. The only time I think about it is when I am on this site, doling out my brand of advice.

I will be honest. My husband was questioning my decision to quit for just this reason. It is hard to deal with a wife who sleeps all the time...for months. HOWEVER, he is happier now that I am not a mind numbed robot working him in to my crazy Adderall schedule. Oh, and not screaming at him on a regular basis...that makes it easier for him to show me he loves me which helps me show him I love him . On a pretty regular basis...with enthusiasm...which, I am sure all can agree, was often lacking on the Adderall. I had more important shit to do and it was a bother. I was constantly thinking "I could be rewriting work procedures or modifying Excel spreadsheets, damn it". LOL, I do not miss it at all!

It gets better, flow. Just hang in there. Soon you will look at the calendar and see that you didn't even notice the 1 year clean mark go by...

Well, there you go. Motivation via prescription. AND you have a quit date to plan for. I am super excited for you. ...let me count this up. It will be a slow and constant withdrawal for 56 days and then the real thing for a few weeks. I wonder if the taper truly helps with the psychological part of it? The physical withdrawal doesn't last as long as psychological withdrawal, in my experience. I still don't understand dragging out the misery, but I hope it works for you and is as painless as possible. We will be rooting for you!

It is the main reason I was able to make it stick this time. Thank God for this site and all of the great people who share their struggles so openly. It helps to know you are not alone in this.

It gets better, really! Hang in there. You are doing so great!

3 months? I can't remember exactly. Can you believe that?!?!? See...it does get better. I know that at the 10 month mark I was starting to get some motivation back. But, after the 3rd month, the weight gain was dragging me down psychologically. I couldn't look at myself and the 40 pounds I gained in the 4 months after I quit. But, I have taken off 20 of them and I am happily working on the rest. I feel great. I sleep great. I am happier, nicer, and just better. So...at this point I can't remember how long exactly I felt like a nasty slug. Isn't that encouraging?!?!

It doesn't sound lame at all. I got there, too. I wanted to be me again.

Maybe...it is a sign that you should just quit cold turkey. Maybe...you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. Just a thought. Of course, I will support you no matter what method you choose!

I was working full time. Two kids and a husband who needed a fulltime mom/wife, too. I was junk for a while, and the house was a genuine wreck. But, the kids liked me more. My husband liked me more and wasn't afraid of me for the first time in several years. I had been taking 30 mg instant release twice daily for almost 6 years. I never took more than my prescribed dose, but I was an addict all the same. I was a mess. I just know that I have tried tapering before and this is the only quit that has stuck. I can't taper. I just can't. I am not saying it can't be done, but it is so torturous, with no end in sight, that I would always cave and go back to the pills.

Unfortunately, he has to want to quit to be successful. I wish you all the best.

So true.

Niacin will cause massive hot flashes and flushing.

If you really think about, does a messy house make you a bad person? Give yourself a break and let go of the impossible expectations you have set for yourself because Adderall once made it possible. You will never be the person you are on Adderall when you aren't on Adderall. So, stop trying to be. It is not so bad to be a normal person. There is too much pressure on super heroes.

Adderall caused me to grind and clench my teeth. Clenching your teeth causes jaw issues. Jaw issues can cause headaches. Awful headaches.

Same here. They all knew, but were afraid to approach me about it. I was a bit...volatile.

Well said, IMSTAS! BTW, 30's are not old... But, it is harder the older you get.

When you escape the hold that this drug has on you, there is a peace that can not be measured. Please, don't give up on quitting. If now is not the right time, then plan a time to make the change. Give yourself the time to be a lazy slug, eat junk food, and just heal your mind and body. Don't think that this has to be forever. It can't be like this forever. It is too unhealthy and utterly traumatic to your body and mind. I don't miss seeing things that aren't there... Good luck and stay close to this site. We are all here for you when you decide to give it a go again.

You are feeling withdrawal from a mood altering substance. It is NORMAL. "You" will come back with time. Until then, don't be too hard on yourself. This is the hardest thing you will ever do and you are worth it! You will never be that person on Adderall without being on Adderall. You have to set new goals and expectations. Change your way of thinking. It is okay to not enjoy doing mundane tasks. Guess what? Normal, non Adderall people don't enjoy boring, mundane tasks. It is hard to go from being superhuman to being a normal schlub. But, it is so great when you accept it. Hang in there! You are in the hardest phase of your quit right now, but this too shall pass. Remember how hard it is when you think you want to go back to the pills.

Tell your doctor. Cut off the supply. Tell everyone that you know. You need some external accountability. You can't do this alone, hiding in the shadows. Good luck, and you can do this.

You are not alone. We are all here for you! Everyone on this forum has been where you are. Our "how I started using" stories and dosages may have been different, but the rest is eerily similar. We are all kindred spirits. Slightly damaged and sometimes struggling...but strong spirits. You can do this. You just have to stop letting Adderall have power over you. It is really hard, but it can be done. Good luck and welcome!

There are many people on this forum who quit cold turkey. Saying it can't be done is inaccurate and misleading. Great job tapering, and I am glad that it worked for you.

You can do this! Tear up the scripts and let it go. Get plenty of snacks, take a long weekend (a week would be better) and just veg out. You can quit, you just have to stop. Tell your doc, tell you boyfriend, tell everyone. They already know that you have a problem...trust me, they do. It takes a long time. After a year, I finally felt some motivation. The weight is coming off slowly. It can be done. Now, go ROCK this!!

I have never had any luck with tapering. The only successful quits I have experienced have been cold turkey. Cigarettes and Adderall...I just stopped. That is what worked for me. Why drag out the misery? I hope it works for you, but I am not sure it is worth the pain. I say, just quit. Good luck!