Zerokewl

im about 7 months too Robin. Motivation and Focus are still something I struggle with too. I know its improving and I'm getting better. Bu I am no where near my pre-adderall productivity levels. Somedays I feel a lot better, and somedays not so much. The PAWS days are less extreme. I think all you can do is focus on self care food,water,exercise, sleep etc and eventually you will be better than ever. The process of recovery is so much more than just quitting pills, its about finding peace with yourself and dealing with the reasons you abused pills in the first place.

Welcome to the site. Its great to have another Canadian on the site.

blerg

slugish week .... got in a few walks nothing intense. Started doing yoga in my living room which my cat finds amusing.

how big is your lawn?????

Future you just breathed a sigh of relief for avoiding a lot of misery & heartache. ADHD is not a disorder it is a difference in cognitive ability. All this diagnosis really means is you'd make a lousy accountant.

americano

Please just chuck them. Your instincts are dead on.

it comes and goes. It sort of weakens with time and eventually goes away. You are still very early in your quit. Take it easy.

I think this was my first ever post here. Interesting I'm still struggling with same issue, though I've improved some.

I struggle with this every day. On Adderall I would work in big chunks sometimes 24 hrs at a time. I would procrastinate then pump out code in one epic session. Now I have to break projects done in chunks. Doing small pieces, like working on a puzzle. I find the podomo technique (lots of apps available) 15min focus -> 5 min break play with the cat. I try to complete 8 podomos before a long break. Re focusing, learning to work again takes some serious tenacity. You have to stop procrastinating. You can't rely on epic all nighters to get everything done. Other things I found work varying my work environment (coffee shop, library and back to home office). Headphones, green tea & a toothpick are super important to my process. Loose quality green tea (I get mine from a Asian super market) brewed really f'n strong you can get an addy like buzz for about an hour. I do advertising/programming work and I've found since quitting , I've landed more quality clients and done higher quality work that's taken a lot longer than I anticipated. I'm almost 8 months along. When I was in my first month, I was really only capable of working a solid hour a day. At your stage I wouldn't take any big projects on, work on a small pieces. Or work on small pieces that become one big piece. Like a quilt or something. I'm still struggling with not popping a pill every time a deadline comes up. This is the hardest part of being clean is figuring out how to motivate yourself. Anything that gets blood flowing to your brain yoga, exercise, ginko-biobla etc is effective. Caffeine is effective but you can overdo it (less is more). Caffeine stimulates the whole nervous system while Adderall stimulate the brain giving you that lazer like focus. I'm doing some of the best work of my career right now. 2014 will likely the most creative year of my life. Rebuilding my foundation has been a worthwhile process. Being freelance has allowed me the freedom to nap when necessary, and take a day off. I'm keeping it really simple right now.

Gonzo

early to bed

Good plan to involve your doctor in your decision to quit. Cutting off your supply is a difficult decision to make, but worthwhile. Adderall really does make a mess of your brain chemistry. It takes some time to level off. Day by day you get better. For me the first 3-4months was the most difficult. I imagine with a new baby in the house and all that goes with that your time will just zoom by. Just make a note of why you quit and what you hope to accomplish by quitting keep this note in your wallet and refer to it when its shitty. For me getting fired, dumped and completely losing my mind was a rock-bottom moment I don't wish on my worst enemy. Years of being a busy ad executive took their toll and I crashed really hard. I don't think your situation is nearly as extreme as many on this site so your recovery should be easier. I was averaging60-90mgs a day plus 36mg concerta, and I drank& smoked a lot then too. I abused it hard and chased the euphoria something I don't think you do. Now I work slower but the quality of my work is better, I have to really deal with my ADHD (yes this is a real thing). Recovery isn't all bad there are little gifts along the path. Things like reconnecting with a high school buddy , that make life just so fucking amazing. Or when you land a new client because you are can have a real connection with them. When the fog clears and the first rays of light crack through they are glorious. Just keep it real simple for the first little while,

I'm on Zoloft for depression too. 50mg isn't a big dose and Zoloft is relatively safe. I wouldn't recommend going off it just yet. Depression is tricky its not one thing you do, its a combination of things that can alleviate it.

You have to do the hard things. You have to make the call you’re afraid to make. You have to get up earlier than you want to get up. You have to give more than you get in return right away. You have to care more about others than they care about you. You have to fight when you are already injured, bloody, and sore. You have to feel unsure and insecure when playing it safe seems smarter. You have to lead when no one else is following you yet. You have to invest in yourself even though no one else is. You have to look like a fool while you’re looking for answers you don’t have. You have to grind out the details when it’s easier to shrug them off. You have to deliver results when making excuses is an option. You have to search for your own explanations even when you’re told to accept the “facts.†You have to make mistakes and look like an idiot. You have to try and fail and try again. You have to run faster even though you’re out of breath. You have to be kind to people who have been cruel to you. You have to meet deadlines that are unreasonable and deliver results that are unparalleled. You have to be accountable for your actions even when things go wrong. You have to keep moving towards where you want to be no matter what’s in front of you.

PAWS ( Post Acute withdrawal Symptom) . Your brain still wants its candy and is sorting out how to live without it. I've found alcohol can bring on PAWS like a mofo. At 7 months I've found if I'm taking care of myself (sleep, food, exercise) I can avoid a PAWS days.

I think this the perfect time for you to quit. The depression is the worst part of recovery a new baby will flood your mind grapes with all sorts of awesome dopamine. Everyone I've spoken to about getting clean from amphetamines etc, the ones that had the easiest time of it had major life changes (travel, love etc. ). Also if your work suffers some, or you are tired etc. Everybody at the office will assume its the new baby keeping you up at night. Just my two cents but I think you can turn this into a win.

whatever the mind can conceive& believe it can achieve.

http://youtu.be/UmCtWskzmAQ

Depression is part of the withdrawals, it takes some time to level off . Most of us struggle with PAWS days. I'm 7 months along and its definitely improved but it could be better.

slept all day. #$%^&

Fbreeze

dit - do it today